I miss my Bro-mance

[MrBrightside15]

I need some good advice. I'm doing incredibly well in all aspects of life right now - I just graduated from college last spring and ended up getting a great job right away - I'm a high school English teacher. That's been going incredibly well, my students and coworkers have really taken a liking to me, and I'm really liking what I'm doing. I'm living on my own now in a very nice apartment, and I have a great family that supports everything I do. As I said, I'm doing well in life right now, that is except for the social aspect...

 

I'm very lonely. Mostly it is still stemming from a very bad breakup I had with my girlfriend last spring. We were together since high school and living together, and after it ended I was pretty lost. I didn't really know how to operate alone after being with her for so long. Luckily, I had some great friends to help me through it. One friend in particular, I'll call him Peter, was invaluable. We were good friends before the break up, but after that he really became my best friend. We worked out together almost every day, went on road trips together, and hung out every weekend. We were two single guys just having a great time. He ended up getting a new job this June where he started working nights. It changed things a bit, we couldn't see each other quite as much, be we still made it work. We planned a road trip for early August together to see a friend of ours, something we had done before. Towards the middle of summer, our schedules were making it really hard for Peter and I to see each other a lot. At the end of July, I texted him to go to a movie we both wanted to see, and didn't hear from him. A few days later I tried again, and he texted back that he was out of town, but would be back Monday. Monday night I texted him to work out, and never heard from him. I actually haven't heard from him since. When August came I tried getting a hold of him to see if we were still going on our road trip, but he didn't respond. I lost my best friend, and we didn't even have a fight or anything! This guy does have major commitment issues with girls and is a big loner. One time, I can even recall him talking about how sick he was of seeing another friend of his and how he was going to stay away from him for awhile. I never thought that would be me.

 

Now I really miss the guy. I got through the summer fine because I had a lot of friends home from college for the summer, but now school's started again and they're gone. I do have friends here, but all of them are either married or are living with their girlfriends, no joke, and I really hate being the third wheel. When I do hang out with them, it's usually just watching tv or something boring like that. It's not fun. I've been spending way too many Friday and Saturday nights by myself because no one contacts me to do anything. It's been about a month of this and I'm starting to get depressed. I really want to be friends with Peter again, but not sure what to do. What should I do?

[meoww]

aww well I feel for you. Sometimes breaking up with friends is really tough. But I think the same advice you hear in romantic relationships applies: the ball's in his court to establish contact with you. You don't have much control over this. You might make a new friend who is even more of a match--so get on that.

 

There are many ways you can meet people, so I suggest taking a good look at your hobbies and interests and find a way to make them work for you socially speaking.

[buddha55]

I would just state your feelings plainly and clearly! "hey man! been a while since i heard from you. i miss seeing you/i miss our bromance. hit me up!" or however you talk to him... but just say you miss him! sounds like you had a solid friendship, shouldn't be too weird I wouldn't think.