Six months ...

[Timefornc]

Six months, a third of the relationship. Not really heard from her since the second month. Blocked from everything I believe.

 

I pushed lots. And now, honestly, truthfully just want to be friends. I can't see her ever speaking to me again. Its very sad, if anything I thought she would be wanting to be friends.

 

I'm doing everything I'm supposed to. Good most days, but still missing something and I know it's her. I think I used up all my contact cards and now all I can do is hope one day she will reach out to me.

 

I read posts here saying they disappear forever. I don't want an apology or an explanation anymore, just a clean slate of being friends.

 

I think I may have burnt my bridges though. No questions from me, as I know the answer will be forget about it.

[askltk]

Six months, a third of the relationship. Not really heard from her since the second month. Blocked from everything I believe.

 

I pushed lots. And now, honestly, truthfully just want to be friends. I can't see her ever speaking to me again. Its very sad, if anything I thought she would be wanting to be friends.

 

I'm doing everything I'm supposed to. Good most days, but still missing something and I know it's her. I think I used up all my contact cards and now all I can do is hope one day she will reach out to me.

 

I read posts here saying they disappear forever. I don't want an apology or an explanation anymore, just a clean slate of being friends.

 

I think I may have burnt my bridges though. No questions from me, as I know the answer will be forget about it.

 

I see your Six months - and raise you to 10! Ha

 

Honestly, there's no point hoping to hear from her, if it happens, it happens. No benefit to you waiting around.

 

Disappearing may make you feel like your giving up, but fact is all your doing is giving her what she wanted - and that's for you no to be in her life. With you gone, she can understand the ramifications of her decision to BU - and then miss you etc... It's rubbish, but it's better than hanging around.

 

Seriously, its much better having NC than having LC - trust me on that.

[zaza34]

I know this feeling when you realize you have done everything you could (bad or good) and you just want to clear things, to just leave things in a nice way, but they refuse even to look into your eyes again... Well, I asked him once to just meet and have a talk after the BU but he said no, so I am not asking him anymore I realized that I am alone in this from now on, so I need to close things alone... And maybe you should do the same... It s not easy... It would be much more easier if they would at least consider having a decent conversation, but if they can t do this, just accept it...

[Timefornc]

It's the single thing left in my head. We were good together, she fell out of love, I accept that now. But it beggars belief that a friendship couldn't come out of it.

[Timefornc]

I see your Six months - and raise you to 10! Ha

 

Honestly, there's no point hoping to hear from her, if it happens, it happens. No benefit to you waiting around.

 

Disappearing may make you feel like your giving up, but fact is all your doing is giving her what she wanted - and that's for you no to be in her life. With you gone, she can understand the ramifications of her decision to BU - and then miss you etc... It's rubbish, but it's better than hanging around.

 

Seriously, its much better having NC than having LC - trust me on that.

 

I don't think she misses me as regardless of what I have said or done if she missed me she would have made a tiny effort. The problem is finally accepting she wants to completely forget everything as opposed to salvaging a friendship. Woosh, like nothing happened. The notion of never knowing someone I cared about in general seems ridiculous to me

[ngu11]

It's the single thing left in my head. We were good together, she fell out of love, I accept that now. But it beggars belief that a friendship couldn't come out of it.

 

Friendships rarely come out of a BU... I actually became quite good friends with an ex (we were only together a few months) but it was because i didn't really have strong feelings for her. Even x amount of years on, I still get this weird kind of possessive feeling when we hang out...as if she owes me something. The strange things is that I have no interest in her and never looked back...just good mates to this day. Go figure!

[Timefornc]

I'm good friends with a previous ex, that's all good. Never really think anything of it. And the recent one was friends with hers. So I assumed, considering she made the break that it would have been easy to have a friendship. We have a big geographical distance, so other than catching up there is a massive unlikely chance we will hang out.

[luvsomeone333]

i think you should leaver her alone, cause i know its very hard for me when im trying to move on and then all the sudden they come back saying sorry. i cannot fully forgive my ex just yet but you need to realise time will heal and you should give her some space. She s trying to move on and doesnt need you to hang over like a bad smell. My ex left me for his ex gf and it really got to me. It took months to recover. But now im stronger than ever. Dont think she hates you, just give her sometime to think. obviously your still hung up about her...otherwise you wouldnt have been so desperate for her friendship. I know i want to one day come back to him but for now i need some breathing space and to reflect on my live and become strong enough to not let anyone hurt me. i loved my ex and he broke my heart and its very hard when you have to face that pain and to face the person who broke your heart. so i think my best advise is to leave it alone for a while if she messages you back then it means she is ready to talk to you and strong enough to face you cause i know im scared to face my ex cause i dont want to ever feel hurt again....

[Timefornc]

I was dumped. I feel over it, wouldn't want her back. A Opportunity to be friends is all that I offer. I dont see what the Fuss is in giving it a shot. I'm not apologizing for anything

[mhowe]

Time and time again on these boards you see people looking to "just" have the opportunity to be friends. That only works if both people want it. And it can't happen if one still has strong feelings. She doesn't want to give friendship a shot....accept that and let go.

[Timefornc]

Time and time again on these boards you see people looking to "just" have the opportunity to be friends. That only works if both people want it. And it can't happen if one still has strong feelings. She doesn't want to give friendship a shot....accept that and let go.

 

I guess it's different when everything works out for you

[mhowe]

If you're implying that it is different because I am in reconciliation, it isn't. I accepted his decision to walk away. I later accepted his decision to try again. I did not call, text, email or "try to be friends". Because, honestly, right after the break up, I was not capable of being "just friends". And he didn't move on to anyone else, nor did I.

 

A relationship, be it intimate or just friends, takes two people. She doesn't want that. You need to accept that.

[indesign]

focus on the fact the you should move on to the next best thing. whatever that may be.

[Tanzi]

I think it is pretty obvious that you really want to be more than "just friends". The mere fact that you want to be friends is a clear indication that you are by no means ready to be friends. What you really mean is you have resigned yourself to being friends and you would rather have that than nothing at all.

 

Tell me honestly ... how would you feel if, as friends do, she told you about some boy she had just started seeing? Can you honestly say you could handle that? If you had her as a friend of fb could you honestly say it wouldn't bother you to see pictures of her and her new guy together? Are you really ready for friendship?

 

Do yourself a huge, huge favour ... stay well away.

[Timefornc]

If you're implying that it is different because I am in reconciliation, it isn't. I accepted his decision to walk away. I later accepted his decision to try again. I did not call, text, email or "try to be friends". Because, honestly, right after the break up, I was not capable of being "just friends". And he didn't move on to anyone else, nor did I.

 

A relationship, be it intimate or just friends, takes two people. She doesn't want that. You need to accept that.

 

I wasnt implying anything. Everybody deals with things differently. The fact is I would be quite happy being friends, because I don't want her back and think we could be friends.

[ngu11]

I wasnt implying anything. Everybody deals with things differently. The fact is I would be quite happy being friends, because I don't want her back and think we could be friends.

 

Look deep within yourself mate...do you REALLY think that you can be just friends, if she proposed that? Could you handle her talking about a new guy that she can't stop thinking about...how much in love with him she is.How he makes her happier than any other guy has ever done? If you can do that then you're a better man than most! Being friends with your ex gives you a front row seat on her new happiness! Did you see what i wrote about an old ex of mine that i didn't even have feelings for? A level has been crossed and it's pretty much impossible to write it off. Get it out of you mind my friend...it will do more harm than good.

[Timefornc]

Look deep within yourself mate...do you REALLY think that you can be just friends, if she proposed that? Could you handle her talking about a new guy that she can't stop thinking about...how much in love with him she is.How he makes her happier than any other guy has ever done? If you can do that then you're a better man than most! Being friends with your ex gives you a front row seat on her new happiness! Did you see what i wrote about an old ex of mine that i didn't even have feelings for? A level has been crossed and it's pretty much impossible to write it off. Get it out of you mind my friend...it will do more harm than good.

 

Cheers mate, I like your posts. And to be fair really liked mhowes too. Very inspirational. I get what your saying and if she had a new guy then fine. Didn't jump immediately like I exPected her too an single as far as I know. But now long enough has gone for me to be happy if she has found someone. She meant a lot, so I ain't playing no games to get her back.

[luvsomeone333]

Then if u trully love her u should respect her decision. Sometimes u have to let them go in order for them to come back ..

[luvsomeone333]

Btw I ve always been the dumpee n not once did I ever break the NC rule cause I see that the Dumper made the choice so its up to them to come back u shouldn't even be stressing about this ...

 

Can I ask u what happen?