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I look attractive, but don´t know how to flirt. Could you give me advice on it?


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Hi all,


as I wrote in the title, I don´t know how to flirt. Usually it is easy to gain a bit of attention from guys for me, but when it comes to acting in an easygoing flirty way, which will not be too heavy and allow me to back off, if necessary, I feel clueless. I think I can hold an interesting conversation, but that´s about it.

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Well let the boys flirt with you. Play hard to get. Dont approve them straight away. Dont look as if you are waiting for them. That will create attraction in them.

Also when you dont know somebody and want that person to come to you. Just look at him and then look away as if you are watching him like a thief. Also if you make eye contact then smile. That will provoke him to talk to you. Then if he asks you to buy a drink or so, try to make the conversation long like asking him why does he want to buy you a drink, if he says you are pretty then tell him that , you have heard it so many times, he should try something else. And keep the conversation teasing. But also dont become rude. Dance with him and then later in the night you know what to do ??


Do you want to know anything else............?

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Thank you! But I ment to ask, how to flirt, if the conversation is going on already (for exampel about movies, hobbies and so on).


How can I flirt with someone I already know, but to whom I would like to express, that I may be interested in him in a romantical way? And in the same time avoid being too forward, in case he is not interested (which is quit probable and I would just like to make sure)?

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Best way to do it I find is to allude to sexual things every now and then. It kicks their brain down one certain path which should hopefully push them into flirting with you some more. Its not something you can write out as it is entirely dependent on the context of the conversation.

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@Smiling Kitty


If you want to give hints, occasionally touch him like clean some dust from his collars or get a fly away from him, Hold his hands a little longer when you shake hands. Also show more interest in what he says. If he is not dumb, he will understand your feelings. If he is a play boy he will flirt with you without seeking your approval. If he is shy, he will blush.

Give him signals that you want to explore him more, like ask him whats his plans are for weekends. When you go out with him, do not bring in your or his friends with you. You too should be alone. Lets suppose you both are watching a movie in a theater, then if the guy is mature he can put his hand over your hand. Do not resist at that time. Keep watching the movie.


Finally the killer thing that you can do to know the other person's interest

watch a movie with him alone. If he puts his hand over your hands definitely he is interested. If he does not do that then you should make the move. Place your hand over his hand and then remove. If he responds positively like he touches you back after sometime, he is interested. Dont try this with someone in whom you are only interested and has not made your mind to move into a relationship.

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Ooo, that's a toughie. I know some guys may be taken aback by it and wouldn't know how to respond the first few times (until they get comfortable around you) while others would jump into flirting without actually having any interest in getting with you.


That's the double edged sword of flirtation; some do it all the time because its fun and boosts people's egos, others do it only when they are attracted to someone, and some just don't do it at all and prefer you just blurt out your intentions instead. I'm sorry I can't give a clearer answer than that.


How about posting an example of one of your flirtations and we can see how it went?

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I think (from a guy point of view) a good long stare is the one.

Just long enough for it to be a little uncomfortable but not creepy.


One of those stares that screams out that you're thinking something very intense.

Then pretent to catch yourself doing it and look away and a little shy after.


I just hooked myself thinking about it!!!


Try it out in the mirror.

Be ready to think it looks silly when you do it but trust me, people see you in a different way than you see yourself.


Failing that,

You could always be blunt?

Just say, "you know what? I think I like you, I'm not sure yet, but I think I do"

Guys will be flattered just as much as girls and find it hard to not feel this way when told that someone likes them.

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Thank you, Joshi! Everything you have written, makes sense.


Unfortunately I think, that I am too much of a coward to really go for the move in the cinema. We were there couple of days ago and our shoulder were touching often and for quite a long time. How much (or little) could I read into that? (It is not unusual to get a hug or kiss from a friend when saying goodbye or hello around here.)

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BlueMilk: This is what I have done:

We discussed one very good movie with couple of hot scenes in it (I started the conversation about it).

I looked into his eyes a lot, while we talked (but that´s completely normal, isn´t it? And I do it everytime I talk with someone).

And I put on a lip balm once (and he really watched my lips at that time).


Danny: Thank you for the compliment, but it is not my picture, unfortunately


I have to try the mirror thing, it seems interesting and could work.

To be blunt seems to me to be too radical solution for the situation, but if I get really desperate, I will think about doing something like that.

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@Smiling Katty


Ok i understand your problem now. Your problem is not 'how to flirt' but your problem is how to get rid of shyness. You are probably very young below 18 i guess and you also seem to be a virgin. Ok first i tell u the truth about touching your shoulders, the guy who touched shoulders with you is very much aware about that. He definitely enjoyed that. But he also seems to be a shy guy like me. He does not know how to make the next move. He is not sure whether you like him or not. He is also afraid that he could lose your friendship. Its a typical case of both of you being shy.

Having said that, i think you should first understand him more, dont concentrate on flirting straight away, see if you actually like him or not. If you like him then keep seeing him, dont worry about flirting and all, let him be more comfortable and then things will happen naturally. Just keep the patience and keep touching him..........


This posting and replying on forums is a bit slow, i think you should contact me on my yahoo messenger....if you want the id i can give you........i am not that much shy you see !! Lolz

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