heartovermind Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 OK so my bf was living with me on an off but now has offically moved out an in with his friend its been a few weeks now anyway last night i mentioned him taken me there as i havent seen his new place yet an dont really know where it is and he said he wouldnt be taking me there at all because it is his friends place an he is just staying there, which isnt really tru because he is paying the rent ect and half the time he is there alone anyway as his friend works away. I just thought it would be nice to check out his new place an go there sometime instead of him always coming to me. Do u think this sounds suss him not wanting me to go there ?? Link to comment
He2Him Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 So you guys are dating, and you were living together and now he has moved out and to top it he doesn't want to take you to his new place for whatever [insert a fake/white lie reason here]. Isn't that kind of opposite of idea behind two people being together? Link to comment
elcie Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 Yes, the fact that your BF seems to be concealing a part of his life - where he lives - is of concern. Your own doubts should tell you; your inner voice is usually right! Link to comment
heartovermind Posted June 22, 2011 Author Share Posted June 22, 2011 well he moved out because we moved in together to quickly, yes i wasnt happy about him moving out but cant force him to want something he wasnt ready for, anyway he said he needed his own space to have a breather, its complicated i have a four year old daughter also an he finds it hard to deal with her also not being use to kids an things so he needs his quite time he rekons. which i think is very selfish considering him living else where is not what i want at all, but i still see him 3 nights a week which im quite happy with for the moment, id just love to be included in his new lil life if you know what i mean ?? Link to comment
f1r3f1y3 Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 Some do find it difficult to "take on" someone elses child as obviously he becomes a father figure by living there, to at least a small extent. How old is he and how long were you living together? Maybe he was finding the adjustment difficult. Impossible to know if he is hiding something/someone based on what you've said, we'd just be guessing like you are. What is for sure is that he has taken a big step back from the relationship. Moving in then back out is not great for your daughter. You deserve.. you need.. to know where you stand in his mind. Is he checking out gradually? Link to comment
heartovermind Posted June 22, 2011 Author Share Posted June 22, 2011 we were living together for maybe 3 -4 months on and off had alot of arguments to do with a friend of his and his weird friendship with her, i dont know if he is checking out gradually hes always saying how much he loves me an he just financed me new laptop on the weekend, and keeps talking bout the future like the holiday we plan to take overseas next year an things, im thinking he just wanted to improve our relationship again by moving out. I have a few issues with over analyzing things so dont really know if im over analyzing him not taking me to his new place or not lol Link to comment
whatsthedeal Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 omg.. your relationship is not progressing its getting worse... And usually when your gut is telling you something its true. Link to comment
banal Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 Generally when people keep their lives separate, and insist on doing so when asked not to, it's because they're concealing something. Link to comment
iBroken Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 Is this friend he is living with the female friend? Link to comment
f1r3f1y3 Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 I don't think you are over-analyzing this. 3-4 months living together then he moves to a place you can't see is strange. If you can't get anywhere talking, why don't you push the fact you want to see his place? If he is really just living with a mate, why would he resist so much? Link to comment
Chicklet Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 well he moved out because we moved in together to quickly, yes i wasnt happy about him moving out but cant force him to want something he wasnt ready for, anyway he said he needed his own space to have a breather, its complicated i have a four year old daughter also an he finds it hard to deal with her also not being use to kids an things so he needs his quite time he rekons. which i think is very selfish considering him living else where is not what i want at all, but i still see him 3 nights a week which im quite happy with for the moment, id just love to be included in his new lil life if you know what i mean ?? He doesn't love you and he wants to be rid of you. That's what I think. When someone loves someone, they don't move out. They stay, because that's what a relationship is....learning and growing, not taking a step back for a breather. He'll hurt you, it's only a matter of time. Sorry to be so blunt, but it pains me to see someone so misguided and manipulated and that's what he's doing to you. He just needs to man up. Link to comment
heartovermind Posted June 23, 2011 Author Share Posted June 23, 2011 @ chicklet, if he wanted to be rid of me wouldnt he just end it?? Maybe he just doesn want the sort of relationship i want i have no idea whats going on im so confused, Last night he came over unexpectedly and i mentioned seeing his new place again, it was the same response as before, it isnt really his place so he cant really have ppl there an i have my own place so its easier for him to just come here, I told him that i think he is hiding something and he said he has nothing to hide an that the reason he has given is the real reason i cant go there, and when he has his own place i can come over whenever i want too. Its soo fustrating, i am completely open an honest with him and really do expect the same in return, i have been trying to give him the benifit of the doubt but he has lied so many times before about silly little things its hard. an yes this is the female bestfriend that he is living with Link to comment
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