ferna3069 Posted April 20, 2011 Share Posted April 20, 2011 we have been broken up for a month and twenty dayd already. she got mad when i told her that i couldnt be her friends. and got mad when i deleted her of facebook.she was the one who did the breaking up. i know she was trying to use me to feel better. but i cant stop thinking about her. im on day 21 and its hitting me hard today. i havent been able to cry much. and today right now as i type this im crying. i cant help it. before the break up she told me she would not be where she is right now if it wasnt for me. i helped her threw the worst times.she told told me i was the best thing that ever happened to her. but i know that if it was true. if she really loved me she would not of broken up with me. she told me her reason was because she was not happy with herself. because she was scared of the world. well she was abused as a kid. so i understood. but then her friend told me that my ex said that it was because i was not always nice. then she told me some of the things that only my ex knew. i did no contact because i dont want to be selfish and be there with her wanting to be with her.i told her wait a month. im not going to call but i dont know what im going to do if she calls.i love her and im not angry that she broke up with me. im angry that she talked about me. telling every one i was so bad. then she had the nerve to get mad at me when i told her im getting out of her life.i dont get why she could not tell me what i did wrong. she never opened her mouth. there was things that i did not even know hurt her feelings Link to comment
boyblue Posted April 20, 2011 Share Posted April 20, 2011 I think the best piece of advice I have heard is watch what they do not what they say. All this wanting to be with you crap is just that: Crap! My ex was the same all this stuff we get on great really like you etc blah blah wanted to keep seeing me but anytime we actually talked or I tried to initiate a date etc, this was kind of near the end btw, it was all these excuses, lets go slow be friends etc, nothing to talk about, sorry busy tonight. Silence as well no answers just lame lame excuses and twisting everything so it was my fault. Not saying I was perfect but at least I tried to talk things through, she on the other hand did not want to listen and flaked out anytime we should have tried to talk and resolve things. In short it is best to cut you losses and walk. BB Link to comment
ChellyV Posted April 20, 2011 Share Posted April 20, 2011 ferna3069 how long have you guys been together? if you think that she just broke up with you out of impulse, give her time to get her act together and then initiate one final conversation. i know this might not be a popular suggestion here, but it seems like you two just hit a bump that would have been fixed with 2 heads together. but remember to be prepared after that conversation. and also try to refrain from doing anything drastic after an anger attack. once you guys talk, and she makes it clear that she wants out, start NC and start healing. start looking beyond this girl. its a loooong and painful process but i know, like all of us here, hope that everything will be ok for you. hope is all we have. however, if right now you are sure that you want to move on, just treat this day as one of those days and part of the healing process. keep posting if it will help. we will all get there (healed, restored) and man, i can't wait!!! Link to comment
ferna3069 Posted April 20, 2011 Author Share Posted April 20, 2011 we where together for two years and four months. if you go back to the post of what you would of done. i posted more info Link to comment
ferna3069 Posted April 20, 2011 Author Share Posted April 20, 2011 here is the thread Link to comment
ferna3069 Posted April 21, 2011 Author Share Posted April 21, 2011 man the pain is coming back. i want to call her so bad. i feel like im loosing control. i know she isnt coming back so i see no point to it. how do i stop loving her ?i have this terrible feeling of loss. i dont think its a good idea to call her. she probably is out enjoying life. and im here in pain. i stayed strong for 21 days. i dont want to break contact . maybe i should just leave to the gym.the only thing is the gym is a two mile walk. which wehen im by myself my mind takes me to her. i need some support Link to comment
cdalton17 Posted April 21, 2011 Share Posted April 21, 2011 Goto the gym and focus on the task at hand, Focus on the now, not the past or the future, This is what I do, It is hard, Show that inner strenght, You obviously have it, I cant go more than 4-5 days with out contacting my ex, Been almost 3 months post break up, I made it a week on time. Yhat was it, so you have it in you. I focus on the now, Or atleast try, otherwise I would be contacting her everyday like I did the first two weeks of breakup so it does help me, I can go a week now, I am on day one again And I am going to try for atleast 2 weeks, one day at a time, and then when my two weeks are up I will try for another two, Link to comment
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