I just want him back

[cosmokohn55]

I know time is the best thing after a break up.. but I am so lost .. its been a month in 3 days since the break up. He says I can call him. Which I don't . If I do its about our phone bill or apartment bills that we share. I do threw in that I miss talking to him. He says he knows , or I do too. I hate this .. why can't he just call me or text me and say I want you back baby . I'm sorry ... I love you and miss you. I know this is a far dream that probably won't come true. but its just a hope that I have... we had a wonderful relationship .. until I went back to school , and I realized that I had a miscarriage .. due to bleeding and a ton of pain. We didn't know I was pregnant . I think that this had something to do with the breakup because he said he needs to get his life together before getting back together. He were to be with anyone it would be me ... he just got so scared.. I love him with my entire soul.... I can hear in his voice how he is excited to hear my voice even though were not together...but is it a good idea to go no contact.. also his sister and her bf are coming to visit me ... which is good , but its weird cuz its his sister,but we are very good friends ... we all us to hangout all the time.. since we are only a year apart...

[heartbrokeangel]

Calm down, stay cool! Don't compromise yourself by taking the risk of saying something that you might regret. If what he says is true than let him take his time. The pregnancy probably came as a shock so let it cool down for the meantime.

[greywolf]

Keep yourself busy. The less you think about him and have other things in your life to occupy your time, the faster you'll get over him. I know you want him back, and it's ok to want that, but you can't put your life on hold waiting for them to come back either.

[cosmokohn55]

Thank you so.. much .. I need to calm down and stay cool , that's right. .I started apologizing for being to needy and calling to much when we were together.. he said that I apologize to much and that it was fine.. its nothing to apologize for.. but I told him I was sorry anyway and truly mean it now because I said the same thing immediately after the break up ..This was on the phone yesterday.. I called him ..When we were together I would keep him on the phone for about a hour easily.. so yesturday.. I made it a five minute conversation... we talked about the phone.. our pet gerbil dying .. and I said I miss talking to him, he said he knows.. I told him his sister wants to come visit me.. he seamed to sound like he was happy to hear my voice.. and than I apologized for the neediness I was in our relationship .. he said you already apologized before for this.. I said I really mean it now.. really mean it.. I know it won't change anything but I want you to know.. I am sorry. He said okay.. And than I told him .. Your probably busy.. and he was like uh uh ..I said I am going to let you go. Five miutes I was so proud of myself.. a small victory for myself to show him I changed .. He told me that I could call him later and he'll talk to me later.. I just said yeah bye ..

I know that if he wants to talk to me he will call me.. he knows my number.. but do you think that this shows him a little that I have changed.. btw ..in his voice was pleasant and like when we first started dating.. very excited to talk

[cosmokohn55]

BTW... We are 20 going to be 21 ( my boyfriend ) and I am 21 going to be 22 next month.. we are way to young to have kids ..He has sisters that had children real young and it was very hard for them and their relationships with the fathers.. he always told me that he wouldn't want that to be us. I totally agreed. We both agreed that if we ever did get pregnant we would have an abortion.. but we both didn't have that kind of money either.. so I think when I called him and told him what had happened .. it changed him.. it scared him.. when I came to visit he was happy to see me .. but cold at the same time.. we were both afraid to have sex.. un till we could get some condoms, ( i had gotten in late and the stores were closed.) We never did have sex on my visit .even though we had gotten condoms. we were both scared and we couldn't talk about it. but we did have oral sex and hand job sex .. i guess you can call it. I finally tried to make him talk about it .. and that was the beginning of the famous spring break up ... which is the back ground before these current posts...

[cosmokohn55]

okay .. Ill check it out.. I wasn't sure if the book really works but I'll try it.. thanks again.

[scu22h]

I hear the same things from my ex. He broke up withme two months ago, but still says I can call him anytime, Loves me, and misses me. I caved in and we saw eachother two days ago. I know how you feel, it conflicting when they say all these things but your not together. I guess I'm just letting the time pass and working on myself. I don't know how that book will work? Let me know how it goes...