A female with questionable intentions...

[Shidoshi]

Hello, I'm pretty new to these boards and after reading and discussing various issues, I feel it necessary to ask you guys/gals what your opinion is of my situation. I'm 25 and attending college to get a better job, naturally. I have had numerous classes with a 24 y/o girl who I find to be cute and intelligent. I'm a relatively shy person so I didn't make my feelings for her known, I pretty much just ignored her, though most times not intentionally.

 

One day I figured I would try and make eye contact with her and simply say hello, but I started to notice that everytime I would try she would turn away or look in another direction, which I interpreted as being a possible attraction she had towards me, so I just played it cool, never paying too much attention to it. Then one day, out-of-the-blue she playfully sticks her hand out in front of me as I'm walking by her and says "Whats the password?" I was pretty shocked at this and kinda gave a lame reply, but nothing embarrasing really. After this incident I was gaining the confidence I needed to start talking to her and eventually ask her out.

 

The next time I saw her I got kinda shy again, but I kept telling myself that all I had to do was say hello. Of course she was still purposefully not making eye contact with me so I figured she was just as shy as I was. Finally, I made sure I ran into her in the hallway and asked her what her name was, she told me, then I said "Ok, I just wanted to make eye contact with you." She replied with an enthusiastic "OK".

 

I started to feel really good about things because I seemed to be more in control of the situation, and the next class we had I was bold enough to sit right beside her. Things didn't exactly start off the way I planned though, some guy that knew her comes up to me and says "Hey pretty boy, can I sit here?" He was joking and everything but I didn't come back with anything witty so I felt kinda dumb, but I was still optomistic about things.

 

She didn't immediately start talking to me, but slowly began to warm up to me and chat a little. In my mind this was good, she was even a little playful, so I thought ok, I'll ask her out next class. Then comes the next class, as usual I go sit by her and ask her how she did on her assignment. We talk a little, she's being friendly and everything, then she starts talking about her boyfriend. At this point I'm thinking to myself, "why would she have done all that stuff to get my attention, then kinda spring up the fact that she has a boyfriend?" Mind you, she is still being playful and engaging, but prior to this we never said ONE WORD to each other. After hearing about the boyfriend I didn't even sit next to her again, and she was still initiating playful contact.

 

I can't explain every single thing she did to get my attention, but she was giving me some major signals, and I picked up on them only to find out she has a boyfriend? Was I too late? I mean really, she would even do things like wait for me to pass by her leaving the room and follow me so I could hold the door open for her so she could say "thank you" in her sweet little voice, trust me, she was doing it purposefully. Anyway, I'll stop venting here, but I would like to know what anyone thinks about this, thanks.

[ang3l2004]

Mabe she was trying to make u a bit jealous because she knew you had something for her by the way u acted if not mabe she was just being a flirty friend and was trying to open u up a bit since b4 u were so quiet who knows best thing for you to do is talk to her and mabe ask her out sometime as friends and go from there then you can really see whats going on pm me anytime u need to talk Goodluck!

[Amy_32588]

I say, she may be pretty but forget her. This is the kinda girl that likes to play games. You can be open to going out with her if she wants you but try for other girls... Girls that won't play games. Then again, she could have not relized you were flirting with her and non-intentially led you on. But I wouldn't worry about it. You're young and in your prime. Find other (prettier) girls!

[Shidoshi]

You both make some good points, thanks for responding! Funny thing is, I have a friend who fell for a girl who was doing some pretty heavy flirting, such as rubbing his arms and letting him touch her ass, and I warned him not to let this keep happening until he knew for sure she was interested in dating him. Well he asks her over the phone if she would like to become more than friends (this girl would also call him constantly), and as I predicted, she said she "didn't want to ruin the friendship." I kinda had a feeling that she would do this based upon things that my friend has told me, and also seeing her in action once before myself, and here I am falling for the same crap!