most common advice during a breakup is to lean on friends, however....

[justaglimmer]

what if you don't really have those close friends? I'm in the midst of a breakup right now and I know the breakup is for the best, but it hurts so bad. I was one of those people who lost contact with friends in order to put all my focus into him. Luckily I do have a supportive family, especially my mother, but there's something different about having friends to go out with and get your mind off things. I haven't talked to my best friend in a month, and I feel like if I just randomly call her up or any other of my friends from the past, they'll think I only want their friendship when I'm single. I never wanted to lose touch with any of my friends, it just kinda naturally happened when I was giving all my attention to him and not going out anymore to avoid a fight. Now I'm home everyday for christmas break (i'm in college) and its the holidays and I'm heartbroken and feel like I have no life I'm more of an introvert, and I live in a small town where there's really nothing going on here. Just venting here, anyone else ever felt this way?

[ButIAmAlone]

Absolutely. I'm in the same position right now. I think you've taken a healthy step just by posting here. I've not been a member long, but I've noticed a wonderfully supportive group of people here. There's something to be said about misery loving company. There's comfort in knowing your not the only one. Someone else out there knows what you're going through, at least on a certain level. Try reconnecting with your friends. Be sure to apologize for allowing the relationship to isolate you and try not to let that happen again. If you find yourself in a relationship that promotes isolation, then you know it's unhealthy and you need to cut your losses before you get in too deep. Cyber HUGZZZ for you! Peace, Love & Happiness

[guynextdoor]

Sometimes you get ingulf in a relationship you forget your friends. In a midst of breaking up when your friends are not around you got yourself. Probably the best time in investing yourself, your alone time. Pick up a good book. Remember that movie you wanted to watch but forget to rent? Here is your opportunity. Keep your mind busy.

[peaceOfmind78]

Sometimes you get ingulf in a relationship you forget your friends. In a midst of breaking up when your friends are not around you got yourself. Probably the best time in investing yourself, your alone time. Pick up a good book. Remember that movie you wanted to watch but forget to rent? Here is your opportunity. Keep your mind busy.

 

Excellent advice guy! I'm about to read Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger. I also just finished picking up things off the floor in my room. Oh, look-- i got carpet!

[AloneAgain19]

Call your friends they will feel bad for your loss. Thats what my ex did, cept shes being a * * * * * about it, now I quit facebook lol.

 

Use this forum and get a journal, thats what im using along with friends...

 

 

And if you edit your post and say your cars broken so your stuck at home & your name starts with M, we should probably not talk on this forum lol

[justaglimmer]

thanks everyone for sharing your input, getting a good book really is great advice. peaceofmind78, totally know what you mean about picking up around the house, my bedroom just screams "going through horrible breaking, why bother?" lol. Aloneagain19, quitting facebook is actually a step in the right direction in my opinion! I deleted mine awhile back and there's no way in hell I'm making a new one just to be reminded of what he's up to and who he's communicating with. By the way, no my car isn't broken and my name doesn't start with an M (???) lol

[justaglimmer]

Ugh.. I'm SO PISSED.

 

This is why its so hard for me to let go. I've read up on all sorts of books and websites on how to get a grip on things after a breakup, but all I get is "you'll never make it without your friends" and "IMMEDIATELY call your friends and let it all out, this is essential".. blah blah blah

 

Well I guess I'll just never heal if all this is true because I don't have those sorts of friendships anymore. I lost my friends when I got in this relationship. I've reached out to my best friend and sent her a text about my breakup and she doesn't really have much to say and has not even asked if I'm okay. She has her own life and is used to life without me now.

 

And furthermore, my current schedule doesn't really allow me to make new friends, just the way it is at the moment. I'm not terribly close with my siblings, they are older than me and have their own lives. My mother is great but I just can't vent to her in the way I'd vent to a friend. Plus I don't like to see her all worried about me.

 

So really, who else is going through this? I'm tired of reading up in websites and books that tell me I'll never make it without friends. It pisses me off.

 

Thanks for letting me vent!