Grieving for a lost parent & Getting into a new relationship

[thecatspajamas]

The summer before I went to University my dad passed away unexpectedly and tragically (he somehow contracted an incredibly rare disease, which no doctors could detect, and for 8 months lived with it unknowingly until he became brain dead the second night he stayed at the hospital). A month later when I went to University in September, I met an older (4 years) guy and we eventually started dating 8 months later. My first relationship ever. It was a period of my life where I was unstable... I guess in shock. The shock of it all, losing my dad and going into an entirely new life stage of University made it feel like life wasn't real. And being with this new guy- my first love, first relationship, first everything- kind of numbed the pain. It was as though, shortly after experiencing the worst experience of my life, I was now experiencing one of the best. It definitely didn't cancel out my grievances or pain, though. Initially it was more of a distraction, something to make me feel..well, anything. Now, 2 and a half years later we are still dating. Though he never met my dad or knew me prior to his death, somehow it just feels right.

 

Of course while I was first hanging out with him I wondered if it was inappropriate to do so. But I realize now I was just doing something, anything to numb and distract from the pain. Luckily it has worked out though.