Is my friend being messed around?

[Almost Real]

I Really need some advice guys. My best friend has been very disappointed in love these past 2 years. He keeps falling for people who don't love him back and this caused him terrible depression.

About 3 months ago he met a girl online and has kept up contact over the phone a lot. he says that they are very much in love and that she is his girlfriend. Anyway after several failed attemts to meet each other he invited her to come stay with him for a month. The problem is that she didn't book the ticket until the day before she was set to arrive and so lost out on the flight. Now she has 'lost' her passport. I'm worried is she stringing him along? Shes only 17 so maybe shes nervous about travelling but if they really love each other as much as he says would that be an issue? I dont want to see him get hurt again. Is it really possible to love somone over the net/phone or is he setting himself up for failure?

[Tinkerbell]

Personally, I don't believe that it is possible to love someone whom you've never even met in person. So if it were my friend who was claiming to be in love with someone they'd never encountered in person, I'd give them a serious reality check and tell them that they should wait and see what happens in person before they come to such a drastic conclusion.

Now the second question is whether or not she's "playing" him. This whole losing the flight and the passport sounds a bit fishy to me, perhaps her parents never wanted her to go in the first place and she's been lying from the beginning? I suppose he ought to give her the benefit of the doubt, but keep his guard up at the same time to prevent himself from getting hurt.

[Almost Real]

The strange thin is (he says) her parents don't mind at all and are encouraging her to come. She certainly has nothing to fear fromy my friend or his familly but I would'nt have expeted that reaction from my own parents, they would've hit the roof!

[hurtbylove]

Yeah, if my daughter asked for a plane ticket to see some guy for a month away from home, I would pretty much go ballistic.

 

It does sound kind of suspicious about the whole ticket/passport thing.

 

I agree that while talking is very important to a relationship, you have to be able to interact with that person in person as well.

[Francis]

The fact that she lost the flight is possible, the fact that she lost the flight and later her passport is 100% fishy. I can't believe either that her parents will allow her to visit a stranger in another city for a month.

 

Tell your friend to be very careful, this person is obviously not straight forward. I would say he is setting himself up for failure.

[trypanosoma]

It's difficult to determine whether your best friend is being set up for failure without knowing either one. I used to believe that one cannot fall in love with someone else over the internet. But everyone's different, and I know that there are actually people here who have had experienced or are experiencing online love; a close friend of mine actually married her online boyfriend of two years (she met him at the age of 16), and they've been together for 5 years now.

Your friend has only known this girl for three months, so the girl is probably still hesitant about meeting him in person, not knowing how or what to tell him. That can explain why she "lost" her flight and the passport, and why there were many failed attempts to meet in person. ~Tinkerbell~ was right, your best friend shouldn't come up to such a drastic conclusion and should keep his guard up, because a successful online relationship requires trust and open communication.

And as for her parents encouraging her to leave for a month, that is fishy, especially coming from parents of a 17 y/o! It takes two people to make a relationship work, short- or long-distane, so if she continues to make excuses on why they cannot meet without being honest, then he should think twice about wanting to stay in a relationship with her. He is setting himself up for failure if she continues to make fishy comments such as the ones posted. Wishing your best friend luck!