He gave me his number, BUT.....

[jazzbarrett]

So I have this financial advisor at my bank and have seen him for the past 3 weekends solely for business stuff. Our first conversation was awesome. As he processed my accounts, we talked about school, work, family and pretty much everything else. I was really struck by how instantly we clicked. The second weekend, I ran in to him while doing other bank business and he was still really friendly, but seemed somewhat nervous. The third weekend, I had a set appointment with him and he called me Friday to remind me about the appointment. We ended up playing phone tag to confirm my appointment, but I was really surprised that he kept calling me back, especially since I had already given him the info in the voicemail. I have considered that maybe this guy is just really good at his job and not necessarily interested me.

 

When we met for the appointment, he was running late with a previous person, but he came out to tell me he would be right out and apologized. When we finally had our appointment, he kept apologizing and I told him I didn't mind and that I was hoping he would've taken longer because I was dreading a meeting I had after the appointment. He told me that we could definitely take our time. He then started to ask me what I did the previous night (Friday) and week. We caught up with some chat and, like our first meeting, our conversation was awesome.

 

When I told him a friend of mine was getting photos done, he asked if she needed a photographer and immediately started to ruffle through his wallet and started giving me business cards. He gave me two for his friends and then he gave me his, but he just said, "and here's my card." He never went on about what he did (which he went to at length with the other photographers' cards). So I am worried that he gave me his number just for a job and not because he is interested in me.

 

What do you guys think? I know he couldn't have asked me for my number because he was at work and that would've been unprofessional, but isn't there some rule that a guy isn't really interested unless he asks for your number?

[abitbroken]

Well...

 

if you talked about family ...he didn't mention a wife or girlfriend did he?

 

Also..he didn't go on about what he did when he handed you his card because you already know what he does. And he wont ask for your number because he already has it professionally. So the normal rule doesn't apply

 

After you give your friends the information on the photographer, you follow up with him. You tell him that your friend really appreciated it and they ended up calling his friend. It won't be awkward if he isn't interested in you to call and say that. But if he is, you are calling him in a context which makes it not about banking. If he sees clients all day and you mostly would be leaving a message while he is seeing someone - all the better because then it would be up to him to call back. Also, if your friend ends up hiring the person, down the road, you could always say that you are very appreciative and ask if you can thank him by taking him to lunch or dinner.

 

The other thing you can do is be in the neighborhood and drop off coffee for him and coworkers.

 

I would say be more direct, but in this situation, I would be more keen on giving him the "green light" to give him an opening to show interest or ask you out versus being blunt and direct because there may be rules about dating clients.

 

You will be able to find out soon enough if he is interested without fumbling things up.