Restraining order?

[shygrl]

Anybody know how that affects a person's life? Is there any way to convince a judge to prevent it? I havent even been served but I was threatened

[BriarRose]

I don't know how they work. What happened?

[Brittney2008]

If you are a risk to the other person then they are entitled to one..A judge won't grant a restraining order based on nothing.

 

More details would be helpful but I believe you can go to the restraining order hearing and plead your case to the judge? Tell him you won't bother this person anymore.

[shygrl]

The guy gave me herpes and I went a little overboard I told him I would stop, hopefully that's enough for him. I deleted every way I could contact him

[shygrl]

Yes. I'm terrified. I didn't mean to push the subject but basically I was asking him if he has anything else incurrable that he knowingly infected me with. I told I'm I didn't mean to be so intense and that I was just scared

[shygrl]

So basically I better pray he doesn't go through with it

[3boys]

He probably just threatened you to get you to stop bothering him.

[shygrl]

I really hope so. I don't think he wants people knowing he has herpes (we used to go to the same school and it would spread like wildfire)

[avman]

If you are served with a restraining order you are entitled to a hearing to present your side of the story. Yet I must tell you that the burden of proof for granting a restraining order is extraordinarily low. Because it's technically not a criminal conviction, judges tend to grant these if there's even a hint that the person may present a problem.

 

and I went a little overboard

 

What do you mean by this?

[shygrl]

Overboard= texts/email asking him if he has HIV.

[shygrl]

I hate to be rash but if I get a record, I'd prob have to resort to suicide.

[avman]

I hate to be rash but if I get a record, I'd prob have to resort to suicide.

 

Don't you think that is a bit rash?

[shygrl]

Criminal record= no jobs=life on the streets= death anyway

[shygrl]

How long till I kno if he did it or not?

[avman]

Criminal record= no jobs=life on the streets= death anyway

 

Untrue. Plus a restraining order does not give you a criminal record. It is a civil matter.

 

You would find out if he filed it because you would be served with papers from the court notifying you of a hearing date.

[shygrl]

Ok he threatened me 4 days ago and I haven't recieved any papers/ phone calls. What are my chances? Somebody who is serious would file right away right?

 

Oh are you saying it doesn't affect employment?

[avman]

Oh are you saying it doesn't affect employment?

 

Well I didn't say that. Some employers check for things like this if you would have contact with children or some type of social service. Other employers only care about a criminal history and in that case a restraining order wouldn't show.

 

I don't know what the chances are he will actually file. If you leave him totally alone then the chances are better he won't do anything. But if you contact him again, the chances rise dramatically that he may feel threatened.

[shygrl]

Ok thanks for the help! I've never been so scared in my life! I have deleted him and don't plan on any more contact

[Sunny1607307996]

Did you get tested for HIV? You really should if that's a concern.

[Jetta]

Contact the court house and find out if a restraining order has been filed.

 

So sorry to hear about the disease.

[shygrl]

No insurance and I can't afford it otherwise that's why I was so intense

i'm referring to the testing and treatment.

[shygrl]

Thanks jetta. I really hit rock bottom. I'm dealing with so many things right now, Im barely holding on.

[shygrl]

Well the order doesn't go into effect until I've Bern served. Then i contest it in court about 2 wks later. Shouldn't I just avoid being served?

[Fudgie]

I think deleting all contact and leaving him alone is a GOOD move. that's all you can do right now.

[lostnscared]

Honestly I don't blame you. If someone gave me an STD such as Herpes I'd go apes**** on them. I would harass them, tell everyone about it, AND tell anyone I know who is dating them. Simply because they FAILED to inform me. I also would be curious about what other things they may have given me. Herpes is one of those STDS that can be painful and pretty awful and it isn't something that I would take lightly, so your actions as crazy as they may be are warranted. and he's a jerk to think that you shouldn't be upset.

 

For now cease contact. But if you know anyone dating this man then please inform them because I doubt he will.

 

Good luck.