No contact rule

[chikatita]

Many of you have probably read my previous post..Just to recap:

 

I met a guy15 years younger, he lives two hours away. We used to spend weekends together. The three months we were together was something I have never experienced..We seemed to be totaly inlove. We cried when Sundays came and have to say goodbye. He was very posessive and so was I. Both of us telling each other that we have never loved like this. I am an ex model and he could not tell me enough how attractive I am (I never got that from my ex husband)..

After three months this young guy decided to end it..He just wanted to be friends. I could not understand it.He seemed to change overnight..We kept in touch daily by skype and text..At times he gave me hope that we are getting back together and just as quickly he would lift me up he would drop me again..I would sit in tears on skype with him just staring.. He stil got jealous if he thought I was talking to somebody else..It has been very confusing..

Then he told me he has found somebody and I must not text him anymor because he did not want her to know...a few days later he said it was not true..he confused me completely.. I do however know he has been going out at odd times..turning his phone off and when he gets home in the early hours of the morning he wants me on skype..sometimes I sit on skype with him from 2am to 4am!.. I love him and can not take this anymore..especially knowing that he might be seeing somebody else..I decided to start the NO CONTACT RULE last night....

He texted me at 2:30 requesting I come on skype but I ignored his text..He texted me about six times telling me if I care about him I would come on or am I sleeping..My heart was racing out of control while I ignored these text messages as I wanted so much to see him on skype..Then he called my house phone and I ignored that too....

Will the NO CONTACT RULE make him realise what he has done? will he miss me more?..will it chase him away?

I miss him and I am finding it very hard to cope..

[Sparkly Eyes]

he doesn't seem to be stable at all. I too believe that you should ignore him, not only that, but you should forget him too. He is playing you and I'm not sure if he will ever truly commit to you. Sounds you are a beautiful woman, you can find better men.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

I agree he is playing you. The guy does indeed sound unstable and you are better off cutting him out of your life for good.

[livelarge]

I totally understand NC and sometimes even not telling the person that you are going NC. But was there a reason you couldn't tell him you were not talking to him anymore?Honestly, if somebody I talked to all the time just disappeared, I would freak out a bit.

 

Second, it's impossible to say what NC will do to him. But you know what it will do to you. Do it for yourself, not to change his behavior.

[chikatita]

I appreciate all your posts and advice..I need your help to get through this because I have nobody in Canada who I can turn to. All my family and friends are overseas.I rely totaly on my internet friends..I am finding this extremely difficult to do because I honestly and truly love him! PLEASE keep posting...

[thankyou]

Maybe what i'm thinking from reading the post is out of nowhere- but from what i'm thinking, is there a possibility he's not over you but broke up with you just becasue he didnt know if he could settle with someone 15 years older? Maybe because of parents approval or just because he didnt think it would end well/that he could have a serious relationship for too long because of the age difference?

 

I dont know, that's just what it seems to me. Possibly that is why he's acting like this, he doesnt want to let go- and frankly, doesn't know HOW. He still wants you in his life and is still in love with you, but can't handle letting you go, though he's decided to. Either way, it's not fair to you. Because that's a feeling that will not change. NC is a good idea, if you feel you're ready. Staying attatched definitely wont do you any good- it will only hurt more every move he makes that is not favorable to you.

 

Good luck with No Contact, and i really do with you the best. Go out and meet people! You sound beautiful and smart and you can find someone your own age or younger as well who appreciates you just as much but for a permanent period of time! Wish you the best.

[chikatita]

You are all such wonderful people..giving such good advice from your hearts and every bit of it helps..I got through one night.. now to get through today but I am breaking down alrady..I have cried and my stomach is cramping up... Now I know what they mean when they say that love hurts!