whats going on?!

[fallen_darkness]

I've been seeing my boyfriend for over a year now! He's lovely, he's my best friend and things are good!

Except for the main problem...we never have sex!

 

At the start we were "at it" every night, and it was really good, but the past few months it became less and less, to the point now it could just be once every 2weeks!

 

i spoke to him about this and he just said he was stressed and when I "bring it up" it puts him off even more, he said being made guilty about the amount of sex we have is a turn off!

 

I really do care for him, so i dont want to see our relationship end because of this! But it makes me feel so unwanted, im actually scared at times to try to "have some fun!" because i dont want to be turned down anymore!

 

I just dont understand, when we do have sex...its realllly good! so i just dont see why he wouldnt want it more!

 

I know i couldnt expect us to have sex everynight forever, but after 1year, i didnt think it would be like this!!

 

does anyone have any ideas? am i expecting to much??

[jenna-is-here]

Errr, somewhat of a red flag. Has anything changed? Has he gained weight? Have you? Did he lose his job? Does he have more stress than usual that you can see?

 

I have had some experience with this in the past but first I want to see if anything changed?

[fallen_darkness]

Well, he's had the same job for a quite a while, hes a teacher, and generally around this time of the year it is stressful with exams, but its all calmed down now and its still just as bad!

And yeah, we both gained some weight, probably affected him worse, but it went on wayyy back, and it never stopped anything then!

I guess that could be a factor, but all spontanious love making has ended too, its such a shame, i know that if we were to have sex it would be on a friday/saturday night just before sleep! theres no romance in it!

There's an age gap too, he's 10 years older than me, he's currently 30! I think, maybe its just my age and im expecting crazy amount of love making, but i know plenty of people 30+ just reading this sight that are having sex 2 times a day so i just dont know whats up!

i've tried putting on some sexy underwear for him, but i just dont think he even notices anymore.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Is he attentive to you outside of the bedroom? Does he still do special things for you? Do you cuddle and kiss each other? In other words has he generally lost interest in the relationship? Contrary to popular belief, not all relationships are all sex all the time. Real life does get in the way and some people just have other things that they are interested in besides constantly having sex. There is more to a relationship than just sex. Many times reduction of sex has nothing to do with how a person feels about their partner, it is just that they don't feel the need to be at it like rabbits...they feel the relationship is solid and that sex is not the only thing keeping it together. If he is stressed and getting over stress he may be fine with sex once every two weeks. There is nothing wrong or abnormal about that...that is just what he is fine with right now but it may have nothing to do with his attraction to you...just that he doesn't need sex as frequently as you do.