Am I gay? How the hell do I know?!

[xsidx]

I'm so confused... I'm a girl and I find other girls way more attractive than guys. Everytime I'm watching something on TV I always think I'd rather be kissing the girl than the guy. Guys just gross me out sometimes for stupid reasons like body hair and they smell worse. But then it's not like I get "turned on" by girls either. When I think of actually having sex w/a girl, I think it's disgusting... but I kinda think it's disgusting to have sex with a guy too. It's like I have no sexual feelings at all which is a totally different topic I'm getting into. I'm just totally screwed up; I have no idea what to do. I also get obsessed with different girls a lot and don't know what that could mean. I've never had any dreams about having sex with a girl though or any fantasies. I really need help and someone to talk to about this. All my thoughts are mixed up and I can't figure anything out. PLEASE HELP!

[xxatti]

How old are you?

 

You're probably going to say what does that matter, but I say that if you're 35 and have been fantasizing about kissing girls all your life then you might be gay, or bi. But if you 14 and fantasizing you might just be confused.

[QTpie87]

yeah thats what i think too, i was wondering a while ago, not long ago either.

i might go gay though, not bi, just totally gay, im tired of being confused about guyslol

[wellswomyn]

xsidx,

 

For me, being gay has to do with more than just sexual attraction. I knew I was gay as a young teen, way before I had any real sexual desire. I just always felt more comfortable with women, and can relate to them on a much deeper level. I have had many close friendships with guys, but it's just not the same for me. I have always known that I would eventually end up with a woman, even though I did 'experiment' with guys in high school.

 

My Point: Don't worry about what you may or may not be, just take time to explore yourself. When the time is right, you will just know.

 

btw, I have never regretted the fact that I'm a lesbian. I have had some really great relationships, and mind blowing sex, and am still close friends with several of my ex girlfriends. Not to say that homophobia and gay bashing doesn't suck, but for me it has been worth the struggle to get to where I am now in life.

 

Take care,

kim

[fairyfemale]

xsidx, i used to be a bit grossed out by guys too (body hair, smell etc.etc. sounds so familiar!). .. but i guess that was because they are just different then us girls!!! But i'm 21 now and always fall in love with guys and am attracted to men.... so you can still go both ways i guess!

[Cadence308]

I think that age would have something to do with the way you are feeling.

 

When you say that you have obsessions with women sometimes, are they women friends? Do you think that these obsessions could also be crushes? Do you think that you could ever have sex or do you see yourself kissing or being physically intimate with these girls you are obesessed about? Do you just want to cuddle with them and be close to them? Do you keep thinking that wherever you go you keep meeting these wonderful women and why can't you meet any guys that are this great? If you are answering yes to a lot of these questions you are probably a lesbian. However, if you still say yes to these same questions, only about men, then you are probably bi-sexual. Keep in mind that levels of attraction fall sort of on a scale.

 

I recently discovered I'm bi, but I'm still sorting things out and in many ways I feel aversions to men, also. For me, I just haven't been able to connect in an intimate, emotional way with men like I can with women and for me to be in a sexual relationship it is necessary for me to be there emotionally, as well. So, for me, it's not just about the sex, but connecting on a deeper level.

[Cadence308]

I think that age would have something to do with the way you are feeling.

 

When you say that you have obsessions with women sometimes, are they women friends? Do you think that these obsessions could also be crushes? Do you think that you could ever have sex or do you see yourself kissing or being physically intimate with these girls you are obesessed about? Do you just want to cuddle with them and be close to them? Do you keep thinking that wherever you go you keep meeting these wonderful women and why can't you meet any guys that are this great? If you are answering yes to a lot of these questions you are probably a lesbian. However, if you still say yes to these same questions, only about men, then you are probably bi-sexual. Keep in mind that levels of attraction fall sort of on a scale.

 

I recently discovered I'm bi, but I'm still sorting things out and in many ways I feel aversions to men, also. For me, I just haven't been able to connect in an intimate, emotional way with men like I can with women and for me to be in a sexual relationship it is necessary for me to be there emotionally, as well. So, for me, it's not just about the sex, but connecting on a deeper level.