please help.?

[jessss]

okay so..

in september when i started school, there was a new boy. he moved from the school crosstown and he had a reputation of being a druggie. he did drugs, but i thought he was really cute. my friend told him about my feelings, and he started txting me. i asked him about drugs, and he said if he ever got the chance to be with me that he would quit. we talked till two in the morning one weekend and i knew i really liked him. i had never had a serious relationship before. before i knew iit, we were dating. things moved slow for the first few months, but about 2 months into our relationship we kissed. we hung out a lot until my parents decided they didnt like him. we had to sneak around them, but we cared and loved eachother so much that it didnt even matter.

 

in february, we ran into problems. things were getting lifeless, and i asked to take a break for a week and see where things would end up. he took it badly, but he agreed. in the amount of time we were not together, my friend dragged me to the movies and i ended up being harrased by a guy who kissed me. i have never told my boyfriend and do not plan on it. we got back together after the break, and things were smooth. the only thing that was different was that he was changing. he began to get SO JEALOUS when i would talk to guy friends/ other guys. i didnt see any problems other than that. about a month ago, our relationship was horrible. he was jealous over every guy who even lookeed at me. im not saying the problems were all his fault, but i didnt see what i was doing wrong and how i could stop it. two days before the initial break up, he was hanging out with his friend and he started to talk about breaking up. his friend, whom i knew was trying to get him to break up with me, said that i should be worried. the next day, we almost broke up. we kissed the day before we broke up, and i could feel that he wasnt kissing me the same way anymore. i would like everyone to know that at this point, we had already gone to third base. i had never planned on going that far with any guy, but i thought that he was special. that he would stay a part of my life far longer than he did. the day we broke up, he did it over a text message. we dated 7 months. the worst part? he broke up with me for another girl. this girl wasnt just anybody, she was the only girl who i didnt approve of him talking to during our relationship. he started talking to her for his friend's sake because his friend liked her, and soon they hit it off (BEHIND MY BACK). he didnt care about my feelings because 2 days after he broke up with me, he hooked up with the other girl. they hook up every weekend now and he wants to date her. but she doesnt want to date him because she is popular and he isnt. he calls me a "skank" and tells everyone i cheated on him..and i definitely would not do that to him. I LOVE HIM!

 

so pretty much, even after all of this horrible stuff, i want to get back with him. i attempted talking to him in person but he blames everything on me! he even defriended me on facebook. i want him back so bad, or i atleast want the pain to go away!!! please give me advice!

[abitbroken]

okay so..

in september when i started school, there was a new boy. he moved from the school crosstown and he had a reputation of being a druggie. he did drugs, but i thought he was really cute. my friend told him about my feelings, and he started txting me. i asked him about drugs, and he said if he ever got the chance to be with me that he would quit.

 

No one can change "just like that" for someone else. People are who they are. Sure, there are people who honestly decide to make changes in their life, but it is a long, soul searching process with plenty of backslides. I think he was being very manipulative to make you feel being with you is powerful enough for him to quit. So you probably were willing to throw out all your cautions about him taking drugs.

 

I think you really need to pay attention the next time you are attracted to someone and gain some discernment You can think a guy is cute, but it doesn't mean you have to be with him. If they are someone that you wouldn't normally associate with because they are involved with things that are dangerous or that you don't approve of or would allow in your life, it may take willpower, but say no.

 

The best thing you can do is to never contact him again and do not answer calls and texts from him. Do things that make you feel confident and valued, like pursuing a hobby, hanging out with friends, etc etc.