Divine Intervention or Continued Torture....

[PrincessBOT]

History:

 

I ran into my ex. Before he contacted me a few months ago we hadn't had any contact or run in to each other for 2.5 years. Now a few months after he contacts me and a month after I decide to go back to no contact fully confident that we'd never run into each other, at least not in the near future, after all we never had since the day we broke up 3 years ago, we run into each other.

 

My friend calls it divine intervention, I can't tell if it's that or torture. I ask myself if this is torture or some kind of pay back, did I actually ever do anything to so bad to be in a position to be tortured this way. I just want to be healed and over it forever and I thought finding comfort in making his existence go away I would be safe.

 

One thing I am sure of is that it was not coincidence, too many things had to line up for me to be in a place I have never been in before, in a town I don't go places in and for him to be there at the same time. Even more, I didn't see him when I walked in, apparently I walked by him, but afterwards I figure from where he was sitting there is a strong possibility he saw me come in. Before I got to my destination in the place I saw a familiar face though, it was his cousin. We gave each other that I know you look, then realized who each other was at the same time. We laughed and hugged and talked for a minutes, then I walked to my destination.

 

A minute later his cousin came back over to me and asked me when was the last time I saw my ex and smiled, I said well and hesitated to answer and he cut in and said, he is over there. I thought someone was going to jump out with a camera, because this had to be right off a t.v. script. I'd never been here and was only here because my Global Positioning System listed it as the closest one where I was at the time. His cousin told me to go over and say Hi. But I was not going to do that, When my ex and I were speaking after the initial meet up he made it clear that he didn't want to meet up again. When were suppose to I later found out from a friend that he said he forgot, the friend encouraged him to still meet up and he said it's best to leave things in the past. So I was not about to go invade his space just because we happened to be in the same place at the same time. So I walked out.

 

I had to return to pick up my item that was ready and I'll be darn if I didn't run into him at the door as he was leaving. He said hi and I said hi, he said something else I returned the small banter, then told him to take care and walked away. His cousin who was watching us was obviously disappointed, I guess he like me have a optimistic, romantic heart unlike my cold ex. His cousin was like what you are leaving, why, then he turned to me as I was walking by him and said did you speak to him I said yes I said Hi. His cousin had given me his number and told me to make sure I call him because his mother has been asking for me (after 3 years she still does), the cousin, not the ex, . I told his cousin I will. But I don't know if I will. I've run into several of his family members and I miss them so much I really took to his family and they to me. I always take their number but I don't call because it I didn't want to hear about my ex's life without me through them, which is why I had to end my relationship with the family when he ended it. It wasn't easy because some kept calling. His cousin that day even said I didn't want to have anything to do with him, I told him it's more complicated than that, but I do miss them.

 

Running into the ex somehow had an amazing additional healing affect, he was alone at a place where people usually go with people. I was just running in to pick up something, but he'd rather be there alone and go through life alone than with me. From what I'd heard from a friend that ran into him, speaking with him a couple of months ago and his cousin's enthusiasm for us, he is single and/or mingling. If he'd rather do that than be with me than I definitely don't hold out some fantasy of wanting to be with someone who'd rather be that way than share his life with me. So unlike when I cut contact and still had feeling of wanting him when I told him take care and walked away there were no more feelings of wanting him. After two days, those feelings still are not there, which has been the longest they have not been since he contacted me a few months ago. I also feel like I will call his cousin and go visit because I miss them and they miss me and I can handle whatever about the ex because I don't care about him anymore.

[uncomfynumb]

I saw my ex at the grocery store on what would have been our one year anniversary. I surely thought it was a sign after the fact but I was shaking so hard that I just got out of there as fast as I could. He never saw me.

 

I have a habit of thinking too many things have significant meaning behind them when they don't. Just a coincidence that was. And if it wasn't, I surely changed the outcome of fate by leaving.

[PrincessBOT]

I saw my ex at the grocery store on what would have been our one year anniversary. I surely thought it was a sign after the fact but I was shaking so hard that I just got out of there as fast as I could. He never saw me.

 

I have a habit of thinking too many things have significant meaning behind them when they don't. Just a coincidence that was. And if it wasn't, I surely changed the outcome of fate by leaving.

 

I know what you mean and I do think it has significant meaning. The problem is you don't know what. Maybe the significance is that you found that you have the strength to leave the store because the relationship ended for a reason and you've now put yourself and your emotional well being first by not subjecting yourself to being in your exes presence, even by chance.

 

In other words maybe you changed your fate for the better. Of course it could be the other way, but running to my ex the way I did has reinforced for me that if God intends something to be it will happen. We just don't know His reasoning for making things happen, which is why we have to go with what our heart and gut feeling is telling us because it's there for a reason.

[Convict7]

You can't wander around thinking everything has some bigger meaning. Even if some things are a big coincidence. Yes you don't normally shop there, maybe he doesn't either, but you just happened to be there the moment the other was there. It's coincidence. If you tell yourself the universe brought you together then you're not acting for yourself. Chances are that you saw another cute guy while out shopping, maybe the universe put him in that store and you made the mistake of not introducing yourself. See where this leads?

 

Eventually after 2 years you were bound to be in the right place at the right time. We have the free will to decide what we want. No one is encouraging people to go to certain stores to bring you back together. You saw him, evaluate your feelings. Nothing left? Then it was nice to see him. If you wanted him back you own a phone and you could make it happen. Same goes for him.

 

If you really wanted someone would you really need some sort of sign to make you go for them?

[regular joe]

I hadn't seen my ex in months. Now I run into her three times over the past three weeks, twice just this week alone. Yesterday, I actually got a good look at her face and she mine. Something that hasn't happened in almost a year. I too keep wondering is a coincidence or it is fate that we should be together. For example I plans to go to dinner with a friend of mine yesterday. We had a scheduled time, then she calls me and ask me come over a little bit earlier to hang a mirror for her. If that didn't happen, would I have run into the ex? I keep wondering if and when I will get my Hollywood ending.

[PrincessBOT]

Wow, thanks for the snap out of slap, lol As I was reading I was like YEAH! that's right YEAH!, A lot of what you said makes sense, however the timing of the way things happened just are too much to be coincidence. Too much had to line up for this to happen when it happened. I even walked past him without seeing him and would have never known. However, I really appreciate your point of view because that is the way my ex thinks and I am pretty sure that is what he thought about the situation. Which is why I totally agree with the bold part of your comment and also the reason why I said hello briefly and told him take care. Although he can't call me when he feel like anymore because I changed my number. He didn't want a relationship and I didn't want the offer of friendship, then he can't just drop back in my life when he feels like.

 

 

My thinking if I didn't say anything to that guy in the store scenario you mentioned would be because it was not meant to be. If it was then I would have been a position to say something and felt deep down inside of me compelled to say something.

 

FYI- It was not a shopping place where we were

[uncomfynumb]

I am a hopeless romantic and a very spiritual person. I'll probably continue to look for deeper meanings, for significance. It's much a much more poetic existence to me. And I don't it hurts or holds me back in the least. It just makes everything more beautiful in a real world full of heartache.

[uncomfynumb]

Oh and to add, I did actually try to call my ex that 'fateful' day. But because I deleted his number and could not remember it after trying several combinations, I did not get through.

 

Cheers to taking action that prevents further actions and reactions!