not sure if i did the right thing....

[babe23]

Sorry if this is long!!!

 

Hi I was with my ex for 10 years on and off.We had been living together

on and off up until Oct of 2009. Her mom passed away that same month after are break up. I love this woman with all my heart.Her mom and I had

a very good tight relationship. She was like my own mom.

 

We started speaking with each other again but than we get into a fight and we don't speak to one another.This has been going since she left.

Here we are again I did the no contact for 3 weeks now and she started emailing to see how I was doing.After the fourth email I decided to call her

and we had a great conversation She wanted us to go away for the weekend and I was all for it at first. The plan was we would leave today.

Here is where are started second guessing myself and changed my mind because every time we do something like this my heart is all into than we get back and I don't hear from her. She talks about us getting back together and than she is not sure if it is the right thing to do. I tried calling her last night to cancel and she never called back so I decided to email her this morning.

Here is what I said.

 

Hey xxxx

 

I know I would of enjoyed going away for the weekend with you considering it would have been 11 years for you and I if we were still together.

 

 

I started thinking what you had said to me not that long ago. You want to move forward with your life concentrating only on the kids and yourself right now and that you want self respect for yourself which I really understand believe it or not. Listening to you yesterday how happy you are with going to the gym and how good you are starting to look

makes me feel good that your are getting happy with yourself and how you look.

 

You will and always have been beautiful to me in my eyes. Sorry I had to let you know that. I know that I said this before deep down I always saw our relationship work between us but you didn't. I have to respect that for you and you deserve to be happy. The last thing I want is to fight with you we were a family at one time no matter that kids were not mine they were raised by you and I at a very young age which deep down I feel like they were my own.

 

You have made the decision to move forward on your own because that is what is best for you. Life is moving fast at our age and I want to enjoy every minute and I want to be happy with every out come that comes to me day to day.

 

You have finished this chapter of your life with you and I of being together and you have decided to take a different path to find love and happiness which I completely understand but for me I will stay on coarse with the same path that I have been on all these years for every bump I have hit and for every bump that I will hit has made and will make me grow because happiness and love is always ahead for me. I am like you it is nice to grow,to love, be romantic and cuddle with someone which

we both deserve. I had to reread the email from you and remind myself the words that came from your heart is that you truly

want to live your life without me. It's ok I understand and respect your feelings.

 

I know this weekend is going to be rough for me with your mom not being here but I can just imagine how rough it will be for you.

 

xxxxx

 

Now I m not sure that maybe I should of gone away with her because when we do go away we always have fun togther but I want to move

forward with my life.

 

What would have you done??

[OccultFigurine]

I think you did the right thing. With the history you have I can see how tempting it is for you to hang out and go away together, but you've identified that it's preventing you both moving on. Good for you.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

I think you did the right thing. What is the point of going away with someone you want to have a relationship with but who doesn't want a relationship with you. She made her choice and now you have to back away for your own sense of self.

[babe23]

Thank you!!!! Weird she was on my mind all weekend.I don't know how I stayed

strong and not called her to change my mind.

[j.love]

you did the right thing....it seems like the best thing for the two of you is to move forward in your own lives

 

and congrats on not calling her!