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Damn...did that really just happen?


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It feels like I was smacked over the head with a shovel and now I am slowly coming around to realise the girl I loved is gone along with everything else that came with that life.

 

As I look back at the past 3 months of termoil and beyond I realise that I lost something very dear to me, something I worked hard to achieve, something I wish I could have kept alive, but whether I like it or not it is all in the arms of another man. How long that will last, I don't know? I cant help being curious though.

 

Is there a future for me? Well of course but how long that future lasts is unknown. Do I want another partner? Today the answer is no. I just want to be sedated so that I no longer yearn for love or feel the pain of lost love.

 

Through-out my years of arrogant self-pity I always thought the one thing I'd make is a good boyfriend. It turns out all my friends do better at relationships than me too.

 

At this moment I feel sorry for myself. Who knows how I will feel in a moments time. No real thread to this post.

 

Anyone else feel like they just woke up to find they had lost everything? Feeling like you've been hit by a truck? What a shock?

 

DazB

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Do I want another partner? Today the answer is no.

 

DazB

 

You have to give yourself time with this. Today the answer is no, in a month or two the answer will be maybe, and further down the line from that it will be definitely yes. Remember that your breakup is still fresh, and you still have your ex up on that pedestal, plus you are being nostalgic and only remembering the good things about her the relationship, in time she will be knocked off that pedestal and you will realize that things weren't as perfect in the relationship as them seem now. Try making a list of all of the negative things about her and the relationship and refer to it when getting nostalgic. Hang in there.

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You have to give yourself time with this. Today the answer is no, in a month or two the answer will be maybe, and further down the line from that it will be definitely yes. Remember that your breakup is still fresh, and you still have your ex up on that pedestal, plus you are being nostalgic and only remembering the good things about her the relationship, in time she will be knocked off that pedestal and you will realize that things weren't as perfect in the relationship as them seem now. Try making a list of all of the negative things about her and the relationship and refer to it when getting nostalgic. Hang in there.

 

Thanks mate,

 

It's funny you mention this actually. For the first time in month I have started remembering things that annoyed me about my ex. Reasons I had for being unhappy in the relationship and right now I seem to be struggling between having these thoughts and then feeling bad because 'she was really such a lovely person'.

 

I mean, she was and still is such a lovely person but that doesn't mean she didn't have her bad points.

 

I think I am almost at a point of letting go and there is a sadness to it. It is as if I don't want to let go of my reason to be sad, strange, and in my down mood I couldn't see myself with anyone else for some time but the magic of it is, I may actually be learning to be happy within myself meaning I don't need a partner anymore to be happy.

 

Thanks again for your kind words, puts a nice positive note to the end of my long tiring day

 

DazB

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