The correct way to ask out a girl?

[stevo89]

Okay well I know I'm not a guy who really asks girls out all that often (but that'll change soon) so I just wanted to ask everyone on here if you think what I came up with is any good:

 

"Hey [girl's name], I just wanted to tell you that I really like you and I was wondering if you'd like to go out sometime?"

 

Do you guys think thats a good way to go about asking out a girl, because to the best of my knowledge I know that just plain "Will you go out with me?" doesn't usually work too well.. If you think the line I have isn't too good, then tell me what you think would be better. Thanks.

[ToxiC SweateR]

Hi.

 

The way I asked my girlfriend out first, was "Hey you want to go out to [ place ] this weekend?"

 

Just be real calm and smooth about it.

[xxatti]

Hmm... straight, to the point. That might work when you're 14, but as you get older your gonna have to come up with some more creative stuff.

[stevo89]

Okay well, school for me gets out on June 17th. Since summer is coming up, do you guys have any ideas on what kinds of places would be nice for a first date? I'm in southern California around the Orange County / Los Angeles area if that helps at all..

[Mun]

Try inviting her to do something you would both enjoy, movies, local hang-out, or ask her what she would like to do. Be direct when you ask her : would you like to go out sometime- is kinda vague. Ask her for Saturday or Friday.

 

Have fun!

[stevo89]

Oh okay. Well how about, "Hey [girl's name], I just wanted to tell you that I really like you and I was wondering if you would like to go out to [whatever place/activity] sometime next week?"(and the sentence properly adjusted to whatever activity and such). I don't want to give an exact day right away because she can say she's busy that day and reject me right then. So I'll wait for her to respond to the original question, then I can suggest a day and if she's busy that day then I can ask her what day she is free.

 

So now what I really need to think of is an activity that both myself and a girl would enjoy.. There's the local Knott's theme park (FUN! I have an annual pass, and I'd obviously pay for her admission), Soak City water park (gotta pass for that too), cosmic bowling, roller skating rink (ice too; all indoors here in cali tho), mini golf, Chuck E Cheese's, surfing at the beach, band concert, and lastly and certainly least...the common boring movie.

[Kitz]

Wow! I wish the place that I lived had lots of fun stuff like that... here, you can either go watch a movie or hug a tree or ride busses around. Whoo.

 

If the girl you know is a bit insecure about her body, I wouldn't suggest going to the Soak City water park straight up (though that sounds really fun -- i'm jealous!). I think the Knott's theme park would be really good for a first date, but really, anywhere that the both of you can laugh together and have a good time.

[psipro]

...the common boring movie.

 

I wouldn't say that, movies make good dates when you are starting out because the movie fills much of the conversation time. It can be difficult to keep conversation going during a date, and it is important. On the first date I feel it tends to be harder because your don't know her as well as you will when you are on your later dates.

 

I you may want to consider going with a few friends (that you are both friends with), and if you don't have any friends in common go with a few of her friends. This will help make her more comfortable. As your relationship develops just start going with less and less friends until its just you to (This process can really take no time at all and help to make her more comfortable).

 

I agree with Kitz about the water park, and would also say the same for surfing just make sure you can laugh at yourself when you fall off

 

And to your list I would like to add, Ice Skating. Me and my G/F just went, she didn't wanna go really but I convinced her to come and we had a great time (I was the one who kept falling down 8) )

 

Let us know how it goes!

[stevo89]

Oh I see what you mean. I thought that it wouldn't be a good idea to go to a movie because you DON'T get to talk much..but whatever. Since school is ending soon, I don't think I'm actually going to ask out any girls straight up right now. But rather, I'll get some girls phone numbers so I can just uhh hang out with them over the summer then gradually after I get to know them with that then I could ask them out. Don't you agree that it would probably be a better idea for me to just get their phone numbers first for the summer before asking any girl out?

[furyferit]

if a girl likes you it doesnt matter how you ask her out she is going to say yes. i mean what if a girl really likes you and you dont ask her out right she is not going to like you all the suden.

[etdoghawk7]

hey steve, my bffe just got asked out yesterday, and the guy said, " Hey mel, (my bffe) wanna go out with me?" she said sure, and they worked out the details lata. my other best friend, also the person i like is the person who asked mel out's best friend and he kinda forced the kid to ask mel out, but it worked and now everyone's happy

[1Adam12]

it depends on the girl or guy I think..there isn't just One way to ask someone out..I think that is

[mahlina]

Okay, this is what I realize. When a guy asked me if we can go out, sometimes, I'm too pessimistic, and turn down the date. I found that whenever a guy was 'assertive', that's when I least likely turn down a date. I don't know why, but that's just the case.

 

Assertive: "Hey, let's go grab a bite and catch a movie."

Response: "Okay, sure."

Not as Assertive: "Do you think....?" "Do you think...?" " Do you think we can go out sometime?"

Response: "Maybe."

 

Assertiveness shows confidence. I think that if a guy approaches a date more assertively, that's how he will more likely win a date. However, if he's too pushy, the girl will think, "Gosh, he's overly confident. What's his problem?" Meaning, if a girl already says, "I can't. I'm busy," then try not to push it. Guys who are more relaxed, but kinda assertive about the approach, just seem more respectful, confident, and relaxed. Verses a guy who's too pushy, might seem a little too forward (hence the cockyness, which is a turnoff). It makes the situation too unconfortable.

 

Keep a relaxed Joe kinda attitude, but kinda asserive attitude, and I think that girls will dig that. We like charisma. I didn't personally like it when a guy got pushy or emotional (upset) about dates. It just showed a lack of 'immaturity' on his part. Usually, girls don't like drama in the beginning of the 'just getting' to know part of the relationship. It's more of a turnoff. We like the relationship to be 'fun' in the beginning, rather than too 'serious.' We like to reserve the seriousness for later, when we're both exclusive, 'boyfriend and girlfriend.'

 

I'm sure that you'll do well. You seem pretty cautious by the whole approach, and I'm sure that women will dig that! It shows respect on your part. High 5 to ya! =;

[stevo89]

Ohh I see what you mean by being assertive and stuff...

[psipro]

Being assertive as mahlina pointed out dose make a big difference, so dose doing it in person!

[Dreng3333]

Alright man, this is how I see it:

 

1. It helps to know a little bit about her. Not much, but enough so that you can have a rough draft of a first date. The more athletic ones might enjoy surfing or the water park. For the averagly athletic girl the roller or ice skating rinks. And everyone enjoys a movie or theme park. Do your homework. Also be open to ideas from her, as long as you have a plan to fall back on.

 

2. Always be assertive and confident, as previously stated. Your basic plan sounded good. Have an adaptable schedule. Know what you want to say, but let the conversation flow.

 

3. Smile. Remember this is all about having fun. Project an image of a fun guy. Just be calm and collected. It'll go fine, just be yourself........................only better, just kidding.

 

 

 

Good Luck.

[bite_me]

"Hey [girl's name], I just wanted to tell you that I really like you and I was wondering if you'd like to go out sometime?"

.

 

change it to :

 

"Hey [girl's name], I just wanted to tell you that I know you really like me,..... oh and by the way............ we're going out on {day} "

[psipro]

"Hey [girl's name], I just wanted to tell you that I really like you and I was wondering if you'd like to go out sometime?"

"Hey [girl's name], I just wanted to tell you that I know you really like me,..... oh and by the way............ we're going out on {day} "

 

Personally i dont like either, but i think the first one is better, if you come up to somone you know likes you and say that you like her it will make her feel better. If you tell her that you know she likes you it could embarrass her and she may not think you feel anything for her.

[Spruitt123]

in my opinion anything works.

[psipro]

With all dew respect, asking out for a date gets harder as you get older Spruitt123

[Aceshighdrummer]

i just ask them out if i like them and they flirt with me always be on the look out for clues i am a ear younger then u and ive asked out 150 girls or around ther and gone out with maby 30 lol

[Eh Im Canadian]

Just out of curiosity, why does it get harder to ask someone out as you get older? Sure the things you like to do may change, but don't you get more experience? Plus, when you get a little older, girls asking you out becomes more common. Sadly, not too much more common, but hey, it is still pretty cool. Well, I could just be full of it, but I know I've seen women ask men out when they are say 20, yet I have never seen a 14 year old get asked out by a girl.

 

Okay, that didn't have much to do with your question, but my advice is basically what everybody has already said. Do it in person, be assertive, don't wuss out at the last minute, and finally DON'T forget about the date. While it might seem like it is really funny/stupid, that kind of funny/stupid doesn't impress girls very much. Ok, well no matter how you do it, if she likes you, she'll say yes. Good Luck.

[some_other_dude]

On a related topic, there is a girl I REALLY like, but have only become really infatuated with recently, right after school got out. I have her number only because we have a school directory with everyones number, but have never asked her for it, and have never shown too much interest. I would describe my current relationship with her as a casual aquantance.

 

I was thinking that I should call her up out of the blue and say, "Hey _______, would you like to go to _________ with me?" Would that have any risk of her not understanding that I want to be more than friends? Should I add an, "I really like you..." somewhere? PLEASE give me some advise!

[Santa]

I have never seen a 14 year old get asked out by a girl.

When i was around that age, me and my friends didn't have much interest in girls, and it was usually the girls that asked us (me mostly) out. However, after reading posts by like 12 year old boys wanting to ask out girls on here, I can see that perhaps in Canada or something its different, to what it was like for me. When I was 12 girls were smelly.

 

some_other_dude - I know its easy for me to say this, but what have you got to loose? Even if she says no, you will feel better, because you have done it, and you have no regets.

[johnnyboy8888]

i am friends with the girl i want to ask out already and i really like her but if she says no to a date are friendship will be hurt and maybe aukward how do i ask her out