Marriage or More Dating Experience?

[preciousgirl82]

Did your parents want you to be a doctor or lawyer or just marry one? That might be interesting to think about as far as what their values are in comparison to yours. (If they wanted you to be a doctor or lawyer I might have other issues with that - you should be what you want to be - but wanting your child to aspire to higher education makes sense - wanting her to aspire to be a doctor's wife - not as laudable in my humble opinion).

 

My parents always pushed for me to be highly educated and take care of myself (NOT depend on a man). Im not a doctor but i think ive made them proud. Im working on my 2nd masters and im only 28. My mother just always wanted me to marry well so i can have even more than what she has. I personally dont care about monetary things to that extent because id rather be poor and happy, than rich and miserable. I honestly think a lot of what she says is selfish and has to do with her own disappointments and regrets.

[Batya33]

My parents always pushed for me to be highly educated and take care of myself (NOT depend on a man). Im not a doctor but i think ive made them proud. Im working on my 2nd masters and im only 28. My mother just always wanted me to marry well so i can have even more than what she has. I personally dont care about monetary things to that extent because id rather be poor and happy, than rich and miserable. I honestly think a lot of what she says is selfish and has to do with her own disappointments and regrets.

 

Well I'm glad they also had career related aspirations for you too. No need to be a doctor - be what you want to be and congrats on the degrees! Yes, you are right, poor and happy is better than rich and miserable but I think the in between "financially stable" is important and also important to marital happiness, especially if you want a child. JMHO!

[Night Pumpkin]

It should be the ideal for people to marry their first boyfriend / girlfriend, and the less dating experience, the better. I have ordered an engagement ring and plan to marry my first girlfriend this year, and I am her first too. Everything is really happy.

[Batya33]

It should be the ideal for people to marry their first boyfriend / girlfriend, and the less dating experience, the better. I have ordered an engagement ring and plan to marry my first girlfriend this year, and I am her first too. Everything is really happy.

 

Oh, I strongly disagree - there are so many divorces that occur in the 20s because people haven't become who they are yet, etc. I also don't think you can or should generalize about what is good for other people - some people need to find themselves through their relationships with other people, others don't, others have a lot of fun meeting and dating different people and would feel stifled or regretful if they settled down too young, etc. I also think those people who recognize that other people are individuals and avoid generalizing tend to be better in romantic relationships, especially where the two people have a lot of life experiences ahead of them.

 

Congratulations on your upcoming marriage.