ex boyfriends...another guy..umm guilty

[Sexychiick16]

i dont feel right but then i feel perfectly ok with this..theres a guy i know from school n he is really cute n he wants to do things with me n i agrred..

 

but why do i feel guilty cuz i have two exes who i date quite often but im trying to move on to something new n more fun..am i being crazy>

[hurtbylove]

Um, I hope you aren't stringing along two of your ex-boyfriends and trying to look for someone new.

 

As long as you make it clear to your exes that they won't get beyond the friend level, it's ok I guess. But it's really still not advisible.

 

It's really not fair to those two guys that are trying to get you back and you are thinking of pursuing someone else.

 

But as long as you make clear your position on EVERYTHING, I guess it's ok

[Sexychiick16]

hey i knwo what u mean b/c i guess i have been sourta draggin them along..like both of my exes wanted to take me to the movies

but i didnt think they liked me that way still..

 

umm i dont know what to do please help me lol i need this problem sourted out..

[hurtbylove]

Well, do you still have feelings for them? I think it's best to cut off contact with your exes, at least for now. If they never really got a chance to see life without you, it's not really being fair to them.

 

You hold all the cards in your hands and no one can decide what to do for you.

 

I don't know how seriously they feel about you still but it's not fair to anyone at this point I think. The longer it drags on, the more it will hurt later.

 

You will have to stand firm by your decision about what to do.

[Sexychiick16]

i know what u mean dude its not that easy tho..one of my exes is one of my best friends n the other he just keeps me smileing n makes me feel good..the dude that ive been thinkin bout doing things with ..i think hes the mistake b/c i think he will leave me once he gets what he wants...

 

do u think i might be afraid of change or something like that...

 

I dont know what to do..i talk to that guy for like 2 hours on the phone then went to bed n dreamt about my ex...thats so weird to me..since before i went to sleep the other guy was on my mind..

 

wow neways thank u sooo much..if u or neone else can help me ide appriciate it

[TrueHeart]

Sounds to me like you DO still have feelings for your X--err, one of your X's. You feel so strongly to them and they to you because you are comfortable with eachother. With this new guy, if you think he's just taking you for a ride in order to take advantage of you, and THATS your first instinct-- its probably true... and you should LISTEN to yourself.

 

Do you love this new guy? Do you love your X? As hard as it sounds, you NEED to make a decision. Does this new guy KNOW you hang out with your X's? I'll be he doesn't.. Guys don't like competition like that, and even though its friends-only-- you'll totally come out looking like a player. I agree with all the previous posts, you need to make sure that you tell TELL your X's that they're friends only, and you ENJOY their friendships...

 

Its a tough call in any situation.. but honestly, if you have more fun with your X's, I say ditch the new guy who you truly believe is out to take advantage of you.... but then, once you're left with your X's, and you determine you have feelings for ONE of them, you need to make a decision... and stick to it.. Best of luck! Hope this helps

[Sexychiick16]

heyy! i know dude its hard for me..my most recent ex had a girlfriend for a while but she played him n he beat up the guy she played him with n i guess he broke it off with her..he called me telin me all bout it..kind of weird but maybe he likes me...

 

My other ex who todl me he loves me hasnt called ever since he wanted a kiss n i told him no..so i unno i want to call him qand work it out but cant find the words to say whats really on my mind...

[TrueHeart]

Perhaps you need a few days or a week to figure your feelings out.. Just make sure that you don't jump to conclusions. I cannot stress the importance of HONESTY.. Lying gets everyone in trouble.. I learned that HARD lesson the HARD way!!!

 

Rather hurt someone with the TRUTH than KILL them with a lie... Just remember that...

[Sexychiick16]

i know what ur sayin...Im wiling to take my chances telling the truth..thanks for all the helpful advice..but i still have no clue how to pick up my phone n call my ex who i truly care for n want to be more than friends with..N me n the other guy sourtof well im avoiding him so we stopped talking..

 

theres more to this story but its just a lil to complicated to explain..just know that i cant call my ex boyfriend who i do love b/c im scared of being shot down..ill get killed with the truth..ide sure hope he would feel the same wayy but what if hes not feeling the same wayy what then??

[TrueHeart]

Honestly hon, its a chance you're going to have to take. Make your phone call very innocent.. Perhaps something along the lines of, "hey, there's a new movie that came out, have you seen it?"-- or make the phone call very VERY casual simply saying " Hey I thought I'd give you a call to see how you're doing. I'd like to hang out sometime, if you had a spare moment.."

 

You want to portray FRIENDSHIP accross to him. What will get you shot down is if you sound like a desperate fool trying to get him back... You want to show him your happy and ever-smiling, be the FUN person you were when he first met and fell in love with you.. Let him remember on his own your friendship..

 

If he can't see that, or doesn't want it -- I mean after you extend your hand in FRIENDSHIP-- then I'm afraid that you will just have to accept that he's moved on and doesn't want your friendship...

 

BUT---!!! You have to take the risk... Just hope for the best, but expect the worst and you won't be disappointed. If you love him, if you care for him, atleast make the call... If he says yes, you can work from your friendship again-- if he says no, then it just might be the closure you need to move on yourself... You CAN do it!!!