What should I do..?

[-LostSoul-]

Alright.. I'm going to sound like an idiot and all, But I'm really addicted to the internet and chatting. The internet can be a good place.. But I feel so alone, It seems like all my online friends no longer care, and we sort of have drifted away. It's gotten to the point where I'll stay online and just cry for no reason, Because I don't really know what's bothering me, Other then feeling that people don't like me. I've resulted to writing poetry and letting my feelings out, but this wasn't enough.. I've been cutting myself for a year now, anywhere, and when I do cut, It's because of someone I know online and getting hurt and just feeling alone.. Should I leave online and chatting? I know if I do, I'll get more depressed, because people online are all I know all I really care about. My offline life is so much worse, But I do know by staying online it hurts so bad.. So what should I do?

[kuhl282000]

Hello

 

You know you are always welcome here. Great place to meet caring people. A lot of people come here that are hurting. We all help each other here. You are important to the community. I have a online life, but I also have another life. Sometimes the reality is not always what I want it to be at the time. But is the real life that I live daily. My life have gotten much better over the past year. But that is because I have worked at it. No hurting yourself, that is never the answer. Life is for the living. Take it slow until you find your path. You may not feel you are on it at present. But trust me it will come in time.

 

Warm Regards

 

Kuhl

 

8)

[Daniel_Edwin]

I used to spend all of my time on the internet chatting. I'd get up, get online, get offline, go to bed. Or I'd just leave my chat programs on in case someone wanted to talk to me. My buddy lists expanded from five or six people to two hundred, and I always had a bunch of people to talk to. Real life sucked in a major way, but it didn't matter, because I still had my friends. Then they kinda started to drift away, and I got incredibly depressed. It seemed like I knew everything about everyone, and I coul fix all of their problems.

 

Eventually my parents started to restrict the time I spent on the computer, and it didn't really matter anymore because my online friends weren't talking to me that much anyway. In real life, life still sucked, and I was more depressed than ever.

 

Finally, I just gave up on helping people. I didn't care anymore. People could all just die, it wasn't my problem, my life was crap anyway. I started talking to the few friends that I had left, the ones that I hadn't completely brushed aside in exchange for my online friends. I started explaining how hollow, how empty my life really was, and they really helped me. They showed me that sometimes the computer just isn't the same. It just isn't, it can't be, it won't be, it never has been, I just thought it was.

 

Like Kuhl said, life is something that you work at. Consider all of the time that you spend online, why don't you go help someone? Tutor someone at your school, volunteer at a homeless shelter, a food pantry, something for others. I've found that the BEST way to make your real life better is to make LIFE better. Not yours, but those around you. If those around you are doing well, then you will be doing well.

 

One thing that is not much talked about regarding internet chatting, is the falcity that it is. If I talk to you for a few hours online, we can establish a bond that seems quite strong. If we talk online for a few weeks, it seems like we've known each other forever. However, the human brain is making a leap that is not fair. There is something in human sight, and human touch, that cannot be replaced by a computer, and instead of adapting for that lack, the human brain instead accelerates the trust/safety part of a relationship. Thats because it ONLY has one of the sensory inputs that it usually gets to meet people with, so things are different in a lot of ways.

 

If you don't believe me, try creating a new screen name and hitting up one of your friends in real life. Chat with them for a few hours, and if your smart about it, you will be able to find out WAY MORE about them then you should in a few hours. Its because the brain develops a false sense of connection and security with people.

 

I don't want to say that your internet friends are unimportant -- because they are important -- but keep them in perspective.

 

You have to work on your real life, to make your internet life worth having.

 

And Kuhl is right, physically hurting yourself will not solve any problems. It may cause very damaging habits, but it won't solve your problems.

 

What you NEED to focus on is WHY you feel the need to cut yourself? Why your life is so bad that you feel a need to stay away from it?

 

If you can solve those problems, everything else will fall in place.

 

I believe that you will figure it out in time, just keep working at it.

 

 

Warm Regards,

 

Daniel

[-trapped-soul-]

I had one person who encouraged me to kill myself and even said that no one wanted me around anyway, do you have msn messenger at all cause I have it and I am on there alot quite recently and would absolutely love to talk to someone, if you have msn I will add you and we can talk....take care hun I do on what it feels like and it aint fun either keep your chin up and hopefully I can talk to you sometime...

 

take care xxx

[-trapped-soul-]

If you would like link removed go to link removed and click messenger towards the top of the home page....click downolload and wait...my email address is either email removed OR email removed feel free to add me xxx

[-LostSoul-]

Thanks Kuhl, Daniel, and -trapped-soul- for responding back.. I'm going to try to do more things after school, But when I do try I just end up wanting to be online more, It's as if I need it real bad, I don't know how to explain it.. Oh and -trapped-soul- I added you to my msn Thanks for your replies again.. It means a lot