New guy....

[ladyjane83]

So I have recently been trying the online thing. I have been out with one guy so far (4 dates) that didnt work out. But have been emailing another guy who seems very nice and lives very nearby. Have been emailing for about 3 weeks, a message back and forth every couple of days. Sometimes a longer gap between messages, but the emails are always nice and chatty. Anyway on Sunday he emailed and at the end said, well we could send emails back and forth for ages and not get anywhere, so we could catch up one night if you like?" I replied, chatty email responding to his and at the end said that yea it would be nice to catch up etc. I also asked him if he had done it before as Im quite new to the online thing. He replied a nice lighthearted email saying yeah he had been out with 2 girls from online before and said how he thinks its a thing that lots of people are doing these days, so I responded and said that yeah its a poplular thing blah blah blah and asked him how his weekend had been. But know not heard from him..and its been 4 days. This isnt that unusual as there a sometimes gaps like this between our emails, but would have thought that now a meet up has been mentioned he would be keen to set it up? I dont know. I know that I'm now eager to arrange it now that it has been mentioned. We havent swapped numbers yet so am thinking that maybe I could emails him something like "here's my number, let me know when you fancy that catch up just to prompt it...or should I just wait for him to email me again? x

[Puddincup]

I'd send him the email. What you wrote sounds good to me.

[ladyjane83]

Is it a bit to over eager though?...considering I sent the last email? I dont know. I know he has been online so wondering why he hasnt sent a message. But maybe he has reasons. It was him who mentioned meeting up in the first place! x

[Puddincup]

If he has been the one to always initiate the emails, maybe it would make him happy to get an email from you. The worst that can happen is that he decides he doesn't want to go out with you. I don't think you sending the email is going to make such a difference either way. I mean he either wants to go out with you or he doesn't. Send him your number and see if he calls. If he doesn't, remember it is his loss!

[ladyjane83]

yeah I suppose, he was the one who mentioned meeting up so I doubt that I could have changed his mind about me in one email! I think he is just a bit more laid back than me...where Im now eager to know where and when we are going to meet, maybe he is more chilled about it.

Im moving house this weekend and he knows that so I could just email something like "As I'm moving this weekend I might be offline for a while, so heres my number if you want to sort out that catch up"

Even if I'm not offline (i might be, not sure yet)...thats a good excuse to be giving him my number isnt it?! x

[oldenoughtoknow]

You emailed last, it's his turn. I'd wait another day or two. Then send him a quick email that says something like "Haven't heard from you. I guess you're no longer interested. Good luck in your search."

 

If he's interested, he'll respond ASAP. If not, you'll have your answer.

[ladyjane83]

hmmm, I guess im jut impatient. Like I said, now a date has been mentioned I want to set it up!

[bookaddict]

I dated a guy who suggested a date and then never got back to me. I didn't chase him as I wasn't really overkeen on him, could take it or leave it. A month later he gets in contact saying 'what about that date?'. I'm not sure if you he was waiting for me but he seemed a bit too laid back!

 

I would approach him after a certain amount of time and ask if it's on or off and then at least you will know and if he is wasting your time you can move on.

[ladyjane83]

yeah...I have spoken to a few guys who I wasnt really that interested in so wasnt too fussed about setting a date. But I think I'm quite interested in this guy so kind of want to get it sorted. I might wait until the weekend and then maybe email him with my number. I thinks thats better than asking if ts definitly on or off. Its just more of a prompt x

[BriarRose]

Please don't contact him. I would write him off. A man who is interested wouldn't go 4 days without calling, especially since he knows you are interested and agreed to meet him.

 

Personally, I wouldn't have spent 3 weeks emailing someone without a meet-up, but that's me. I like to exchange a few emails, have him call me once or twice, and then meet for coffee to see if there's any chemistry.

[ladyjane83]

So I have decided I am going to just send him my number and then leave it up to him. And I kind of have an excuse to send it because am moving house today so may be offline for a while so if I have a reason for sending it, it doesn't sound so pushy. I'm going for "hey, so I'm moving house today and may be offline for a while. So here's my phonenumber xxxxxxxxxx to let me knor if/when you fancy that catch up one night what do people think? Yes? No?

[Jpo]

I don't really think you can be over eager online. I will ask the second email sometimes. I see no problem with you sending your number, in fact, I think you should have done it weeks ago.