Stinkweed Posted June 9, 2004 Author Share Posted June 9, 2004 I think there is still time. I will try to do it if I see her around. Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 10, 2004 Author Share Posted June 10, 2004 I don't know what to do. What if I see her only with her friends? What should I do? I'm so confused. I want to do this very much. Please help me. Link to comment
Million Dead Posted June 10, 2004 Share Posted June 10, 2004 i think youve got the right attitude dead eyes... if shes with her friends, just try join in the convo... and get ALL their emails, that way it'll seem normal... just act real natural and it'll be fine... oh and good luck with your exams and asking her email. 8) -Million Dead Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 10, 2004 Author Share Posted June 10, 2004 Yeah, but all the girls I always see she hangs out with are complete strangers to me. I don't think it will be very easy to pull that off. Well, I hope I see her alone, or almost alone, maybe I can call her if I see her with her friends. I think that if I call her name (yes, I do know it), she should obviously come alone. I would then give her the letter. Is that a good plan? Today I saw her "alone" in the library. I mean, she was surrounded by people, but I don't think she knew any of them. I wanted to do it anyway, but I just couldn't. I don't know why. Maybe it was because it was too crowded. I don't know. Please help me, there's still hope. Link to comment
Million Dead Posted June 10, 2004 Share Posted June 10, 2004 okay, when you see her next, no matter who is there, speak to her... call her away if you have to, just do it... this is the time where you can prove you have gotten over your anxiety... i'm sure you can do it... i think its an okay plan, to give a letter, but if you do, add something vocal to it... cuz written words sometimes arent enough... tell her you mean every word you say in the letter Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 10, 2004 Author Share Posted June 10, 2004 I finally did it. I saw her inside a classroom presenting her exam. I finished mine much earlier b/c it was much easier (French 3 vs. French 1 At first I hesitated, but the occasion seemed to be so perfect, I decided to not run like a coward. Ok, so I when she came out, I said "Hey", and she didn't seem to have heard, so I got closer and called her name, and at the same time one of her friends appeared. So, I just told her "I just want to give you something", and I gave her the letter. It was pretty confusing. I was kind of concentrated on just her, and suddenly her friend came and stopped on her tracks, and I think she asked her "why did you stop". Well, I gave her the letter and she said "Oh, ok" (She wasn't angry, or anything). She received it in a good way. But I couldn't stick around to say more, because her friend was there and it kind of a surprise to me. I feel so much better now, even though I doubt it will turn out the way I wanted it to. I mean, it should be ok. I just wrote that I wanted to get to know her and keep in touch and I gave her my email. There was nothing offenssive, and I didn't ask her to be my gf, or marry me, or anything weird. Link to comment
Million Dead Posted June 11, 2004 Share Posted June 11, 2004 GOOD ON YOU!!!! thats excellent.... so whats next for you? if she contacts you what will you do then? Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 11, 2004 Author Share Posted June 11, 2004 Well, I gave her my email in the letter. "If" she contacts me, I don't know what I should do. I guess it all depends on what she says. I guess I would try to make friendly conversations. You know, get to know each other. But I don't like to be a pesimist, but I honestly think it will not happen. Maybe I should have done it in a different way, or I should have written different things. I just can't get the feeling that I blew it out of my mind. Oh well, at least I tried... Link to comment
Million Dead Posted June 11, 2004 Share Posted June 11, 2004 you should feel good about the fact that you tried and hope for the best out of what happens... if it all goes to hell, consider it a good lesson for any other girls you meet in the future. Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 11, 2004 Author Share Posted June 11, 2004 It all went to hell already. She saw me today and turned her head as quick as she could. She hasn't contacted me. I screwed up. I don't know what I did wrong, but whatever it was, she didn't like it. I'm beginning to think she didn't even read it, and threw it away immediately after I left. I mean, she received it, and she was so cool about it, but it maybe was all faked. Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 11, 2004 Author Share Posted June 11, 2004 Also, I couldn't talk to her myself, because besides the fact that she definitively has nothing good to tell me, she was with her friends. When I went to see if some of them were gone, she was the one who was gone. Well, what can I do? I played my hand, and still hope it worked, although every day, hour, minute, and second that passes, I know that the possibility of having succeeded is less. What bugs me is: why hasn't she told me to go to hell straight into my face? This doesn't make me feel any better. In fact, it makes me feel just like before I gave her the letter. Maybe I did so horribly that she doesn't even want to waste her breath on telling me to buzz off. Well, who knows what women have in their heads? Still, I don't like to be a pessimist, but I just know that I screwed up. She would have said something by now. But instead, she accidentally looked at me and turned her head as fast as she could and I tried waving, but she had already turned. So, what the heck? What's supposed to happen now? I'm miserable again God, I wish she would instead tell me, right into my face, to go to hell. But no, she hasn't even waved at me. Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 11, 2004 Author Share Posted June 11, 2004 As you can see, I'm feeling very anxious. I'm still hopelessly waiting for something to happen, but I don't know what is going on. Is she supposed to just ignore me from now on and pretend that I never gave her anything? Or is she supposed to tell me to go to hell? I'm trapped in purgatory all over again. Link to comment
wlfpack81 Posted June 12, 2004 Share Posted June 12, 2004 No offense but you shouldn't have given her a letter but rather told her how you felt verbally. I did the letter/card thing once and it was an embarrassment and a failure. Wish I would've paid more attention to where this thread was going or what you were gonna do b/c I would've told you to go another route rather than the letter one. Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 12, 2004 Author Share Posted June 12, 2004 Do you think it's too late to do it verbally? If it isn't, then I could try... Link to comment
wlfpack81 Posted June 12, 2004 Share Posted June 12, 2004 Well, honestly if you feel you still have it in you'd I'd try verbally. Definitely don't make anymore attempts using a letter or card or some sort. Most girls like to have guys to talk to them verbally. Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 12, 2004 Author Share Posted June 12, 2004 Alright. But what should I say? Should I say basically what I wrote her in the letter all over again? What should I do? Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 12, 2004 Author Share Posted June 12, 2004 Nevermind... I mean, I still want to do it, but I can't. So, all I did was ridicule myself. Now, what will she think about me? I made matters worse. I screwed up big time. It's amazing how stupid I was. The worst part is that it's not totally her fault, you know, rejecting me. It's me. I made a horrible mistake, and probably will never be able to fix it. I guess this is the end... Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 12, 2004 Author Share Posted June 12, 2004 would something like "I want to let you know that I really mean every single thing I wrote in the letter", and then ask her email address and phone number work? I mean, I want to let her know that I'm intersted in her. What would be the best thing to say? Link to comment
Million Dead Posted June 12, 2004 Share Posted June 12, 2004 just tell her whats in your heart... tell her you'd love to get to know her better, maybe hang out sometime, you reckon she's a great person etc. just say whatever comes into your head. its usually the best possible tact. Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 12, 2004 Author Share Posted June 12, 2004 I am 100% sure she has the wrong impression about me. I just know it, and I want to correct it. Well, I came up with an idea for when I talk to her. I should tell her that I wrote the letter just in case she was in a hurry, or with her friends, so I didn't have to intrude. Is that a good idea? And well, I want to tell her exactly what you say. You know "I would love to get to know you better, and hang out sometime", well, that. Do you think she is rejecting me already? If she is, then I wouldn't like to seem too pushy. What should I do? am I taking the right path now? Link to comment
abcd1234 Posted June 12, 2004 Share Posted June 12, 2004 By giving her the letter, you created a sort of "barrier" between you. You let her know how you feel but becuase you are so shy in approaching her she doesn't quite know how to respond to it. It has now made her shy in talking to you as well. If you had done it verbally you could have got a more honest reaction from her and probably 'broken the ice' a bit better. You now have to job of talking to her. Personally i would say something like, "I hope my letter didnt scare or offend you but i couldnt bring myself to say it while your friends were around". You have to build up your courage and look for a moment when she is on her own so you dont have to worry about her friends interrupting, then go over and be confident when talking to her. It may take you a few attempts but i know you can do it if you set your mind on it. Remember to think about what you are going to say beforehand so that if the conversation goes dead you have something to say, dont go on for ages just be quick so as to leave her thinking about you. Whatever you do, dont say the words "I am sorry" when speaking to her about the letter, you were being honest and open with her so you have absolutely nothing to apologise for. If you can ask her for her email or MSN then that is great. I wouldnt go asking for her phone number becuase it is a bit one-to-one at at this point and can require a lot of quick thinking to keep the conversation going. MSN and email give people more time to think of responses and so she will probably be more open about giving the address to you. If you set your mind to it then i know you can do well. Good luck mate! abcd1234 Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 12, 2004 Author Share Posted June 12, 2004 Alright. I can do that. Thanks everyone. You know, I realized talking to her isn't as hard as it used to seem. She reacted so nicely when I called her and gave her the letter. Well, about her being alone. I guess I will have to call her, or something, because she is always around her friends, or waiting for them to come, like that time when I gave her the letter. One of her friends came down and looked at me as if I was a creature from outer space, and it sort of freaked me out. It was very confusing. So, I couldn't really stick around. Well, I don't have much time left to do this. I will have to call her even if she is with friends. Well, at least I know it might not be unrepairable. Once again, thanks everyone. Link to comment
abcd1234 Posted June 12, 2004 Share Posted June 12, 2004 Hey, its good to hear that you have changed your view on talking to her I realized talking to her isn't as hard as it used to seem You have obviously grown in confidence, this will help you loads when you meet girls in the future and are unsure of how to talk to them. If she is always around her friends then by all means call her. I wish you the very best of luck, not that you need it mate. abcd1234 Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted June 13, 2004 Author Share Posted June 13, 2004 I hope everything goes well. I also hope that the stupid letter thing didn't harm my chances. And I hope that the look she gave me on Friday is not a "Go to Hell" look. It's that same look she used to give me even before I gave her the letter, so I think it's nothing bad, because when I called her name to give her the letter, she acted very kindly. Everybody wish me luck, because tomorrow will be the hour of truth... Link to comment
pete35887 Posted June 14, 2004 Share Posted June 14, 2004 phew....i'm glad i made it before it was too late. All you've got to do is be yourself. Don't put on an act, or thouroughly rehearse in your head what your going to say. Go up to her and say Hey, how are you, something like that. does she know your name?if not, then "by the way i'm so and so" should come next." Try and be funny in any way possible. right away. Ease the tention by making her laugh. girls love a guy that can make them laugh. crack on yourself, whatever, just don't come out and make fun of someone else all hardcore then she might think your an asshole. Just make small talk. Don't say oh i really like you and bla bla bla. Man my final was really hard bla bla bla which one did you have today, how was that. what are you up to this summer, going on vacation? Say things like that to start the conversation. Don't let it go to long, make sure YOU end the conversation. Don't let it go to where there's nothing to talk about. MAKE SURE YOU LET HER TALK TOO LOL. Don't do most of the talking just start conversations, girls love to talk. dont forget to smile. just be nice and friendly but not to nice. And when you end it say "you seem cool, do you want to hang out sometime", or "it was nice talking to you, we should keep in touch" something like that. (make sure you non chalantly ask for her number too) tell her you and you friends are doing something fun (don't say fun though think of something to do) and ask her if she wants to join you guys, or better, ask if her and a couple of her friends want to join you guys. That one might be better if you get her number and are talking to her on the phone and need a way to ask her to hang out. I'm sure there's plenty of other things i missed that the other guys here could help me out with. right guys? Like some more small talk most importantly. Anyways, good luck and i know it will work out for you. I didn't read this whole thread to watch you fail. When you would say it was over i got pissed, lol. I know you can do it. When I read the post when you said you did it, i was like YYYEEEESSSS. I was really happy for you and i don't even know you. You got this man, it's nothing. go get her. p.s. but don't do the letter thing to anyone again, lol...but at least you broke the ice Link to comment
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