Dating a shy woman

[diverp]

Hello all,

I started dating my girlfriend in early January. We live about an hour apart from each other right now. We met by chance. She is a very attractive (to me) and shy woman. She works as a civil engineer and seems to be pretty good at what she does. I am a software engineer and I am doing very well where I work. I am a little quiet with people when I first meet, but I am very open after I have been around someone for a while.

 

So, we have been dating now for about 4 months. We have gone on trips to San Francisco. We started off by her coming to my house for a single day on a weekend and we would trade off and I would spend a day at her house on a weekend. THat progressed to spening an entire weekend (trading off between her place and my place). We talk almost every night on the phone and sometimes I feel like I am trying to hold up the conversation a little bit. A bit of a pause is still a little awkward to me at least and I am trying to fill in conversation with topics more relative to something she would like. I don't know why I feel like that kind of silence feels awkward. It doesn't when we are in person.

 

We are always reassuring each other of how much we love each other's company. I have been laid up over the last month after having knee surgery and she has been very motherly with me, concerned. I like that. She came to my house for a couple of days a couple of weeks ago and we spent the entire time roaming around town, doing the little things and cuddling on the couch. We also spent our first night in the same bed. She is still a little shy and I don't want to push her into sex right away. However, the time we spent just cuddling in bed was almost better than sex on an emotional level. We really have deep feelings for each other at times like that. She has been married and divorced before and dated a creep before and she was a little cautious when we first met. However, I think I am starting to earn her trust. SHe has one of the biggest grins on her face when we spend time together.

 

She is coming over to town for a long weekend this week and I can't wait to see her. She acts the same way towards me. I am very happy. She seems very happy when we are together. I guess the only things I can see in the relationship that I am still unsure about are: her shyness and being quiet, she always appologizes if she yawns or is tired (she is very polite), I am hoping that she doesn't have a scorned past with her ex and men in general that I will have to over come. I guess I would wonder when the proper time would be to start the conversation about moving in together (we live an hour apart and have careers). We aren't too far apart. I don't want to spook her with conversation like that too early, but since she is a little quiet, I don't get a good read on some things either. I don't want to let things go too long and let her think I don't want to go down that path.

 

She is a find. She is intelligent, stable, she has a degree and a career, she has a house, she is practical, she is starting to show a very loving side as she opens herself up to me.

 

There is nothing bad or wrong with the relationship, I just wanted to get opinions on moving forward and how to be with her when she is a little quiet or shy. Thanks

[last resort]

i would wait forher to come see you then talk moving closer to her until she feels scure with you sitting right beside her who knows she might be a sex god or a kissing god under neeth her shyness

[kuhl282000]

Hello

 

Sounds like a pretty special lady to me. Just remember she has been married in the past. And you mentioned a creep, I hate the creeps. So just keep doing what you are doing, take things slow. And remember she has a brain, and can figure out what is right and what is wrong. You feel right for her, and that is a good thing. Don't read anything into the silence, she just might not have anything to say at that time. Just have some fun and get to know her. It will all work out in time. I'm sure you are very refreshing for her, coming from a creep. Be the gentelman.

 

Good luck

 

Kuhl

 

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