Does it matter if the younger person has a kid and the other doesnt

[AlwayzRight]

Basically, I really dig this 21 year old girl and I am 30. She seems very mature for her age and has a 2 year old son. I do not have any kids. Niether of us have ever been married but have been in long relationships.

 

What does everyone think about this? Does this make the age gap smaller? I know she is only 21 but does having a kid change things at all in terms of the age gap?

[rosephase]

Having kids doesn't make you mature. But being 21 doesn't make you immature ether. If you like her, and are okay with dating a single mom go for it.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Having kids doesn't make you mature. But being 21 doesn't make you immature ether. If you like her, and are okay with dating a single mom go for it.

 

I second this. Maturity is dependent on personality, not on age and not on whether or not you have children. What is important is if you are willing to be in a relationship with someone who has the responsibility of a child. It will not be the same as dating someone without children.

[pinkrobot]

I agree having a kid doesn't necessarily make her more mature. I mean, if that's the logic then it's like saying my boyfriend and I have a bigger "age gap" than 3 years because he has a kid, so he must be more mature than a typical 27-year-old. It just doesn't work like that.

 

There's nothing wrong with being interested in her, anyway. I don't think 21 and 30 is a big deal...

[glegend]

Some mature faster then others. I do agree with above posters that having a 2 year kid at the age of 21 doesn't change the maturity of people. Having children at a young age does make people grow up faster then they are ready to, and for some thing does happen while others just act their age.

 

To everyone the concept of dating a sinlge parent is different. Personally, I wouldn't date anyone who has an kid at my age. I don't need a child in my life. Now if the kid was mine then thats a different story. I feel that if the person is a little older (early 40') or divorced then dating someone with a child alright.

 

Bottom line is that if you like her and want to date her then by all means go for it. If you don't mind it that she has a child then by all means go for it. Yes, there will be people in your life questioning why you are dating someone with a child but in the end really who cares as long as your happy.

 

As for the age gap. There is nothing wrong with it. My parents have a nine year age gap and it doesn't seem to bother them.