**** Really need your expert advice ****

[LGLP]

I'm 22, She is 22. Both university students.

 

I don't even know if she is my gf anymore. She went back to her home country, and joined some outwardbound challenge to fix her life (yes she was really lost in her life and depress her parents suggested it I believe). Well That program definitely made her a much stronger person, The program is 8 days long and she met some guy who is 20 and basically hung out with him for about a week or less before she had to come back to Canada for semester of school to start.

 

They have been talking for less than 3 weeks and she changed her relationship status from single to in relationship, but didn't state it was him. However she tells me it is him, and that she is very confused about it too. We've been together for 2 years, but on and off (also not much peopel think we're back together since we had alot of fights before but always made up, we decided to not change our status from single so others wouldn't stick their noses in, we planned to change it back after she graduates this semester)

 

The thing is she had always claimed she doesnt' like younger guys. She claims he can make her cheerful and that he can make her laugh. She claims that I am very sincere to her (I used to make her cheerful and laugh alot when i first started to date her, but relationships don't stay in honeymoon phase that long)

 

Yes we have done everything, she is my first gf and i'm her 2nd bf. She hasn't physically done anything with that 20 year old, that 20 year old is just an average Hong Kong guy who works. While she is an university with a bachelor of arts degree in health science. Me on the other hand I'm an engineering bachelor student at the same university. She has always wante dto be an engineer too (infact she used to be an engineering studetn at U of T, but had problems with first bf and ended up getting kicked out of school)

 

 

 

Here the problem starts like this, please share your thoughts.

 

I treated her very very nice and I even became the super "fun " and cheerful person when she met me (Yea I finally learned to let go of my dullness being with her for 2 years) So i'm fun and cheerful and sincere so that's not the problem. We even had some physical action on you know what, recently. It has been a week since she has set the facebook relationship with that 20 year old. He is all the way in Hong Kong while she is in Canada so there is no physical contact at all.

 

I told her to choose between us, and she says she's confused. She feels that she's cheating on that 20 year old, and she feels she is cheating on me of that relationship thing. I told her it's only less than 3 weeks how can you even consider someone like him who has an uncertain future with a highschool degree.

 

The last day I hung around her, I made her really realyl happy and made her really really turned on into things. But when she got home she ignored me. I asked her why and she says she needs a week to think about things. (she has school and some other issues with her mom so she's really stressed) she claims to want to not deal with relationship at the momment.

 

What do you think she is thinking? She claims to care about me alot. So why does she need to think about who to choose?

 

Why does she need to wait a week? Also she asked that 20 year old if he wants to see her (she claims they won't do anything), and that 20 years old doesn't have the money to fly over to Canada she said she might have to fund him. And the real problem with her is she doesn't want to be with me is becuase she doesn't want to have s_x anymore, but when she's around me she can not hold it in and just does it but regrets after. (she's extremely turned on around me)

 

thoughts?

 

 

*PS after that time I treated her nice a few days ago, I stopped contacting her on purpose. She sent me a small message reminding me to take my medicine and thanked me for not contacting her. I didn't want to talk to her becuase I wanted to see how she will react if i'm going to disapear from her life, since all i have been doing is begging her to come back, but it's not working so I was thinking if I don't give her my attention she'll start missing me.

[Sorrento]

The only advice I really have for you is to go NC and see what she does. Since she is telling you she is confused between you and the other guy, the only thing that will clear that up is you giving her plenty of space. If it were me in that position I would definitely disappear for a while, as much to get my own head around the fact that the person I love is now apparently in some sort of relationship with someone they met less than 3 weeks ago. I'm really sorry for your situation

[LGLP]

The only advice I really have for you is to go NC and see what she does. Since she is telling you she is confused between you and the other guy, the only thing that will clear that up is you giving her plenty of space. If it were me in that position I would definitely disappear for a while, as much to get my own head around the fact that the person I love is now apparently in some sort of relationship with someone they met less than 3 weeks ago. I'm really sorry for your situation

 

Thanks man, I really want her back (i was a *di-ck* in the past like I was all into school and such since my major isn't easy) I sorta feel she wants someone fun becuase I was really boring for a year with her since the first year we were having fun, but fun dies down when you have done almost everything.

 

I wanted her back so I definitely showed her I can be way funner than that 20 year old guy, not only that I showed her I was sincere and I stopped asking her to make decisions on our outings, I just made choices for her (basically be a man, but not rude). After a few days of making her feel very wanted and showed her my love for her. (it took awhile to beg her out, i even went in her house to dragg her out in which something she would never ever thought I would do, since her mom doesn't like me very much as I break dance and thinks i'm a thug... but i'm a university student, i just don't look like her dad who is an engineer, I don't look like an engineer infact I look like i'm business or arts or something)

 

Well after I made her feel my love and fun ness, I decided to ignore her (so far 2 days) And i'm planning to let her grow a void from the fact that someone who cares about her alot suddenly left and make her realize that the 3weeks guy is very uncertain. I'm planning to make her miss me and drive her nuts over me.