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Unsure if I should attend my cousin's wedding...


Seymore

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My cousin is 24 years old. She's a selfish little spoiled brat who will just step over others if it serves her and only her. She's had a history for at least the last 10 years of coming to family gatherings with stories just to get a reaction out of everyone, like "I think I'm pregnant", etc. - these stories are rarely true, but it almost gives my grandmother a heart attack each time.

 

A couple of years ago her mother and father, both divorced since she was 9, passed away in the same year. Once that happened, the family would be lucky if we saw her three times a year. She showed up a half hour late for her own mother's funeral with a lame excuse. She started dating guys twice her age with kids almost her age.

 

About 2 years ago, my father discovered her myspace page, her blog posts tearing the entire family apart with things that weren't even true. My father had bought my aunt a condo and rented it out to her, since due to her cancer treatment sessions and doctor visits, she could only work part time. So my dad took the loss and did it for his dying sister. Once my aunt passed, my dad couldn't afford the loss anymore and had to sell the condo, meaning my cousin had a few months to go. Well, her blog would say "Uncle D is an a**hole, he's kicking me out and won't give me my mother's money (my dad was in charge of the estate and needed to hang onto it for a while to pay off my aunt's finances and get everything in order first). The things she'd say about our family, her own mom and dad and everyone else - were repulsive. I don't think it was right for my dad to peep on her myspace, but the things that were said...towards her own GRANDMOTHER even, in person.

 

My mother would still invite her over on holidays when the family would get together, and she'd say ok, only to never show up and then berate my mom on her blog saying the family hates her and is avoiding her.

 

My grandmother finally sold her house last month. She gave each member of the family their inheritance early, and doubled my cousin's inheritance saying "I'm giving her her share and her mother's, were she here". Grandma invited the whole family out to a nice restaurant to celebrate. My cousin didn't show, claiming she was in Vegas marrying a 47-year old man whom she'd met 3 months earlier. Turns out that was false - she was 4 blocks away from us the entire time, looking for combat boots to wear on her wedding day. Not only that, she's getting married by a mail-order reverend, which I'm not sure is even legal. My grandma said she's dying inside. My father said he's giving them their wedding gift at their one-year anniversary, should they make it that far. My brother and I both know she wouldn't even show to our weddings and are wondering if it's even worth it to attend the wedding - hell, she doesn't even know the date - just "sometime in September"!

 

Would it be wrong to not attend this (seemingly) "farce" of a wedding?

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I wouldn't go. She sounds horrible and a major attention seeker. There may be a few people who get their noses out of joint with you, but if these are your true feelings toward this girl then, so be it. Just because you're related, it doesn't give her the right to be rude and disrespectful! On top of that, she sounds that irrational and flighty that she will probably have a few more weddings in the future too...

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Is the wedding *this* September? As in this month?

 

Anyway, you have two choices really. 1) Go to the wedding and do your best to have a good time and ignore any rude comments from her or 2) Not go, and then incur her wrath and more complaining about how the family doesn't like her.

 

If it were me, I would go if other members of my family were going. But I would also feel guilty for not going, simply because she is part of my family.

 

And you may not have anything to worry about...if she's as flighty as she seems, she will probably "forget" to send your family invitations. To be honest, I'd be surprised if the wedding actually happened, given the information you have posted here.

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Well, one part of me says, "Wow, I feel really sorry for her"> Another part of me says,"There's no excuse for her behavior-at ALL". However, she doesn't know that or she wouldn't be behaving that way. She sounds like an overgrown brat. However, would it be possible to go to just have a fun time and meet some people? If she starts with her weird "stuff", just ignore it. She wouldn't do it if no one paid attention to it.

 

I do think it's bad that she didn't get her mother's inheritance, though. That is pretty bad, and there is no excuse for that at all...

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I do think it's bad that she didn't get her mother's inheritance, though. That is pretty bad, and there is no excuse for that at all...

 

She did. I apologize, I wasn't sure how to word it without dragging it out, and I think I was confusing in my wording. My grandma gave my cousin her mother's inheritance as well as hers. The logic was my grandma was saying "If your mother was alive, she'd get X amount, so I'm giving you X amount plus what I gave YOU." The condition was that she use her mother's share to go to school, which I am 99% sure is not going to happen.

 

Isn't that date the day you have an appointment to have that very serious, life-saving operation that you have already had to wait too long to have? The kusinectomy?

 

Why yes! How did you know? AND it's my cat's birthday!

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