Hopeful

[mandellin]

I just wanted to say for all those of you who are scouring this board looking for a glimmer of hope....

 

My boyfriend I recently reconciled. It has been a long,hard,and very painful process....but it was worth all the effort.

 

Things are very different between us but in a incredibly good way...sometimes reconcilling does work. I am not saying every time - but if you are both willing to work very hard on it and on yourself and look into counseling/relationship therapy.

 

Best of luck to you all.

[Lavender25]

I just wanted to say for all those of you who are scouring this board looking for a glimmer of hope....

 

My boyfriend I recently reconciled. It has been a long,hard,and very painful process....but it was worth all the effort.

 

Things are very different between us but in a incredibly good way...sometimes reconcilling does work. I am not saying every time - but if you are both willing to work very hard on it and on yourself and look into counseling/relationship therapy.

 

Best of luck to you all.

 

Could you give us some more details?

 

How long were you broken up? Did you do NC? Who initiated contact? What was the reconciliation process like?

 

LOL. I know it's late but I just want to revel in your success.

 

At least give me a good bedtime story

[mandellin]

Well....we have been together for three years minus a short two week seperation and the recent four month seperation.

 

We never actually NC - but the communication was shoddy at best. Sometimes I went a month not hearing from him. I quit my job and moved out of my apartment - got rid of my job,boyfriend,and apartment all in the same month.

 

I moved back in with my parents. I also started traveling all over. He moved away also (we lived together in sin). Long story short he found out his mom has cancer and he started calling me a lot more often. Eventually things just fell into place and we have reconcilled. He (yes this was his idea which is like crazy) asked me to start going to couples therapy with him at church and we met up and have been talking/working things out ever since. We have both changed in leaps and bounds and everything is very different. So much better. Hard to explain,really but life experiences can really change people. Sometimes the little things that are at the heart of the argument aren't really worth fighting over and you don't realize that until you lose someone you love.

 

So many times on the getting back together thread is anger,fear,insecurity,and negativity...just wanted to be positive for once. It is one of the changes he asked for in me (because sometimes I tend to lean towards the pessimistic side of things).