Two faced? Not who I thought he was?

[nicensneezy]

Hi,

 

I have this friend, Tim* who is very passionate about the same things as me. We'd spend hours (and a fortune at the bar) debating the subjects we feel strongly about. These include atheism, sexism, politics, racism, femminism, gender stereotypes, philosophy, aesthetics, science and lots of very interesting and controversial things. I thought we shared the same opinion on these things, because of how much we'd get really excited about discussing them. We'd send eachother articles and documentaries all the time. I thought i had my true ranting buddy.

 

But just the other night, me and tim were in our usual bar except this time there was one other person. This person introduced me through myspace to a good art life drawing club that would benefit my studies (i'm an art student) and so me and tim go every week and it's very creative and fun. We finally had drinks for the first time with this new person, who tim was unaware of, and it was my first time meeting this new person. We had lots of conversations online, we live in the same city and I am a very social person and the club is very close nit, so it's not just a random stranger on the net, its someone who is very involved in the same things as me, in the same city!

 

Anyway, so the three of us were having a conversation and it started to go down a but of a sexist/ feminist route. Nothing unbelievable, nothing man-hating, just a small "yeah that is a bit unfair"... It was this new person who started it and as soon as I contributed to the conversation, taking the controversy up a notch, the new person looked a bit pained, ok fine, he doesnt share my opinion. But what really upset me is TIM also looked pained and surprised, and the both of them looked at eachother awkwardly, there were raised eyebrows, the both of them were being quite ignorant when I was talking, Tim totally ditched me in this, he looked at me totally sarcastically and patted my back in the most patronising way.

 

The thing that annoyed me is the way TIM acted.. him and I have spoke openly about this partucular subject, with no problems but as soon as someone else dissagrees, he makes me look like I'm totally alone with my opinion, when I'm meeting a friend for the first time. He said it was just embarrassing because this new guy wasnt so sure.

 

I am so surprised at tim, I thought he felt strongly about this subject.. but he appears to care more about what he looks like to others than what he actually believes in.

 

When I confronted tim about the way he treated me and how he totally contradicted himself and made me feel like an idiot.. he denied it completely! and said I was "imagining things" !!??!

 

I'm quite hurt, i thought he'd be stronger than that,

 

NOTE: The subject being discussed was not that bad, or that controversial, it was simply about women in computer games and that was it. I got one word in before tim acted like this.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Take this as a lesson learned that some people are chameleons..they will have one opinion when around one person who has that opinion and will do an about face with their opinion when they are around someone who feels the opposite way. In other words, with people like that you can never completely trust what their true opinions are...they are politicians who will go one way or the other depending on whom they are trying to impress and fit in with.