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never thought it would happen to me...


Stinkweed

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I don't really know how old she is, and I didn't care to ask either. My guess is, perhaps, 37. We met in the most unlikely way and we were together for 2 days. I mean, these are things that I actively believed were BS, and they all happened to me so quickly. We had to say goodbye, and we both cried. I still cry when I look at the pictures of us hanging out together. I cry, because it's not fair that we are not of the same age-group... If only we were, everything would be perfect, because even she said it wasn't the distance, but our ages. And I understand.

 

I've never felt this way before for anybody, and don't think I ever will, at least not for a very very long time. Girls my age have always been rotten to me... Not simply generalizing, because I HAVE tried to look for the ones that aren't, but never had any success, even with the ones I was SO sure were different. And I did this to the point that I started thinking maybe my failures were attributed to me having nothing to offer, or missing a part of my brain or soul... And without thinking this happened (not like I was actively looking for someone older... It just happened somehow. I was the one that did the approaching, by the way). The things she said, the way we both cried... we both gave each other something unique and irreplaceable. She saw what I had to offer, things I had stopped thinking I had. I just wish it didn't have to be over. It's like we are soulmates, so maybe our souls will meet again, and then age will be of no consequence, for we will just be souls.

 

I just hope I never forget a single fraction of a second that we spent together for the rest of my life. I don't want to forget a single smell, texture, thought, sight, taste, or sound. I didn't want it to be over, but if it all at least stayed fresh in my mind for the rest of my life, it'd be good enough for me. We are staying and will keep staying in touch... We will both be okay, I know... But right now I just want to break down and cry because of the impossibility. I hate impossibility...

 

And so write this because I know there is no solution. But maybe someone will read this and understand and perhaps say they were in a similar situation and will show me how they coped... Because right now I'm just too damn sad. I don't know if it was better or worse when I used to scoff at how absurd love stories were...

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Thats a sad story, but you will cherish the memory. It will mean as much to her, too. One of those strange quirks of fate which sometimes happen, and there's nothing to be done about fixing them, not in this life, anyway, as you say. All the best,

offplanet

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By the way, thanks for your reply. Thank you very much for taking the time... Only reply. Makes it even more important to me.

 

I dunno if we'd ever have a chance to be together in life... If it's meant to be it will happen. Right now I am hoping it does, but I know that I will have to move on. And I'm thinking that I will have to go back to the US and how sad I will feel when I do... I just... I dunno. I know there will be more tears shed on my part (hopefully not that many by her... I never meant to make someone else cry). I wish I had something permanent that I could look at that would remind me of it all, no matter how many years from now...

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By the way, thanks for your reply. Thank you very much for taking the time... Only reply. Makes it even more important to me.

 

I dunno if we'd ever have a chance to be together in life... If it's meant to be it will happen. Right now I am hoping it does, but I know that I will have to move on. And I'm thinking that I will have to go back to the US and how sad I will feel when I do... I just... I dunno. I know there will be more tears shed on my part (hopefully not that many by her... I never meant to make someone else cry). I wish I had something permanent that I could look at that would remind me of it all, no matter how many years from now...

 

I really don't know what to say darling. A few years back I had a student who would come and do his practical training at the firm I work for and one thing lead to another and we had something alot like what you wrote in your first post, it was wonderful and we really connected in sow many ways it is hard to describe to someone who was never there in their lives.

 

But as you know it will never work, it is that week/month in a bubble that will not survive in the real world, there are just too many forces in the normal day to day life that will tear it apart.

 

Best would be to see it as something special you will have forever, but life don't allow it and to move on and not to look for ways to try and make it work for it just can't and you know it.

 

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Yes, I know... Which is why I have teary eyes right now. I really do hope I never forget, and really wish we can at least stay friends from now on, even if we can't be together that way anymore.... Thanks for your reply/story. I really appreciate your input and I'm sorry you had a sad ending too...

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  • 1 month later...

So why aren't together since you're so in love? Who cares about the age gap? Tell her how you feel and that you love her, that you can't stop thinking about her and crying over her. The age is nothing.

 

Also, welcome to the other side. It's so much fun here. Age gap realtionships are so much better than the petty dating of young love. I'll never go back to trying to make it work with younger people (my age people).

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Yes we've been together for 2 months already... It's been really rough, and I dunno how long until I mess it up (I almost did already...). It's been really harsh at times, due to MY age and MY problems... Hopefully it'll get better as time goes on.

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Wow your post has really hit home with me. I'm 31, and the woman I've just started seeing is 47. Like you said, I've always had trouble with girls my own age or younger treating me badly, or not having their sh*t together. After my most recent break up of a 7 yr. relationship, I decided to totally give up on girls (not going gay or anything...) for awhile. Well that's when I met her. She actually came up to me at the gym. Long story short, we started to hang out quite a bit, and I was thrown off my game a bit since she's older, and I really didn't know how to go about things since I had no idea what she was expecting. Her relationships have been less than perfect let's say... I decided I was just going to take it as slow as possible and see what came of it. She told me on one of the first nights that we actually got really close and spent a lot of time talking that she wasn't sure if she could do this, b/c it wasn't fair to me. She said she has too much baggage. I ended up being able to convince her to just give it a try. As far as I'm concerned, we ended up meeting for a reason, and this could be the best thing that ever happened to me. It has been absolutely wonderful so far, I can't even believe it.

 

What I would suggest is to take it as slow as possible, and realize that you have no control over what that other person will choose to do. If you are meant to be together, you will be. This person has been brought into your life for a reason. Keep at it, show her you're worth hanging on to! I hope this works out for you.

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Yeah, I think things went kinda fast in the beginning. They've kinda settled down a bit, though. We are trying to make it work. It's not the easiest thing in the world, especially because I bring so many troubles to the table... We have a few cultural disagreements, but I think once we get through this rough spot, things will get easier.

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That's a sweet story. I totally get how you feel. I can't stand dating guys my age, because like you said of women your age, they don't have it all together. I like the maturity of an older man. I just hope I can have my happy ending someday too, hopefully with the man I love right now.

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That's a sweet story. I totally get how you feel. I can't stand dating guys my age, because like you said of women your age, they don't have it all together. I like the maturity of an older man. I just hope I can have my happy ending someday too, hopefully with the man I love right now.

 

I think the most important thing is to keep an open mind. I know for myself, I would have never even considered dating a girl older than me, who was divorced and had kids. Those were three deal breakers. It's amazing that with all that baggage, she still brings a ton less drama to the table than girls half her age. It's very refreshing! It's amazing how you can end up with someone that is the complete opposite of everything you ever wanted, and be happier than ever. Best of luck to you as well How old is the guy you are dating?

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