How do you stop wanting a girl who has a bf? - Advice Pls

[neoseeker]

Hi all,

 

Im new here and i've been viewing some of the topics for the past few days and their very intresting including the responses.

 

Anyway im in love with my best friend but she already got a bf (he's also a mate, makes it kinda akward). I have finally accepted that i can't do anything to change it, without hurting her i don't want to see her upset. So how do i get out of my system and stop thinking of her being anything more than just a friend.

 

I say to myself every weekend that im going to stop thinking of her as ever being my gf. But when im with her during the week i can't, it's so hard im 19 and she's 16 but when im with her she makes me feel 16 (i know it sounds stupid) and the feelings that i experince when im with her, their just so amazing.

 

I wan't to be just friends when im not with her, but when i am with her i wan't to be more than just friends. It's driving me up the wall at times...

 

Can anyone offer any advice on what to do, anything would be great.

 

Please, thanks.

 

neo|seeker

[neoseeker]

Hi guys,

 

Here's some to the story that i got today. Anyway i decided to send her a txt to see how she was and she told me that she wasn't doing that well. I asked her why and she told me that she had an argument with her bf (my mate) and they nearly spilt up but they didn't, but they were engaged but no they're not but their still together (in a way). Now just as im trying to think of her only as a friend this happens, is this a sign or just a coincidence that this has happened.

 

Can anyone offer any advice please...

 

neo|seeker

[bb13]

I was in a similar situation recently (and I still kinda am but I've been through this part). I was in love with my best friend and she was with someone and they constantly fought and almost broke up. It took about a month from their first "almost break-up" to their actual one. I never did fall out of love with this girl and she does like me as well. Once she gets over her ex, I am thinking that me and her will end up together. You just have to give it time. If you really want to stop liking her, then spend time away from her. Dont talk to her so much and be a little distant. If you can wait until her and he BF break-up then just be there for her now. Hopefully she will realize that there are other options for her and that might come to mind next time they have a fight. If they do break-up make sure you give her (and him) plenty of time heal from the break-up before you make a move. This will make things better for all involved.

[nobody_knows_jericho]

Hey Neo,

 

You can try these:

1) To fall out of love: think of all the bad things about her eg does she pick her nose, she smells, etc. all the dirty nitty gritty you can find or know about her, perhaps this will give you a second opinion.

2) You can be the noble man, really endure that painful feeling of knowing you can't have her, and just hold on, wait till something bad happens to their relationship, be there for her, etc... and just keep on holding, praying that your perseverance will pay off

3) You can fight for your love and tell her! Do not care about your friend, say your love is real and she is worth fighting for. Try and if you failed, at least you tried.

4) But really i think, you haven't been out much. When you go out to see the wider world, you'll find that there are a lot of wonderful and beautiful girls out there. There's a very good chance that one of this girls will really love you. Try talking to at least one of these girls out there and your perspective will widen. In the meantime, do your best to be desirable.

[wickedbusa]

Just a few words of advice from my previous experiences. Since she is involved with someone right now, try to do your best to not get emotionally attached to her. She will need time to recover from this relationship should it really fail, and if it does fail and you get with her, there is a good chance you will be the rebound relationship that will never work. Just be there for her and hopefully everything will fall into place. Good luck to you.