grymoire Posted May 14, 2009 Author Share Posted May 14, 2009 well thats good... i guess get to know her better and when her contract is up ask her out, and continue the rel you started building... so are you saying not to ask her until she is just about to leave? wow this is in direct contrast with some advice here... specifically the ones that said i should ask her for lunch again soon.. Link to comment
Mutley Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 so are you saying not to ask her until she is just about to leave? wow this is in direct contrast with some advice here... specifically the ones that said i should ask her for lunch again soon.. Perhaps you should follow your own inner guru? Link to comment
Shudder Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 so are you saying not to ask her until she is just about to leave? wow this is in direct contrast with some advice here... specifically the ones that said i should ask her for lunch again soon.. what does your gut tell you to do? Link to comment
grymoire Posted May 14, 2009 Author Share Posted May 14, 2009 Perhaps you should follow your own inner guru? my inner guru says this => ask her for lunch next week. talk a lot. gently flirt with her. i am very clear about the above. my only question is when to drop the "can i get your phone number" or "what are you doing this weekend? would you like to go to this movie with me" line... that's where i need help. Link to comment
Mutley Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 my inner guru says this => ask her for lunch next week. talk a lot. gently flirt with her. i am very clear about the above. my only question is when to drop the "can i get your phone number" or "what are you doing this weekend? would you like to go to this movie with me" line... that's where i need help. You are the man with a plan. The other stuff will come to you as well. Link to comment
hers Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 Tomorrow is friday. Ask her to lunch. At the end of it say "what are you up to this weekend? If you wanna hang out, let me know". If she says ok, offer your number. But like I said, be prepared for rejection b/c of the ex thing. Link to comment
COtuner Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 Just trust your gut during the lunch conversation. You'll know if the opportunity is there.... Link to comment
COtuner Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 Tomorrow is friday. Ask her to lunch. At the end of it say "what are you up to this weekend? If you wanna hang out, let me know". If she says ok, offer your number. But like I said, be prepared for rejection b/c of the ex thing. That would be good. I've tried that with good results in the past, keeps them from having too much time to think about it Link to comment
Shudder Posted May 14, 2009 Share Posted May 14, 2009 my inner guru says this => ask her for lunch next week. talk a lot. gently flirt with her. i am very clear about the above. my only question is when to drop the "can i get your phone number" or "what are you doing this weekend? would you like to go to this movie with me" line... that's where i need help. get her number next time you see her. just feel out the situation. Link to comment
grymoire Posted May 14, 2009 Author Share Posted May 14, 2009 oh man... today afternoon i actually stopped by her cube and during the conversation i asked her "so are you ready for the weekend?" and she said yes and told that she is visiting her friend to help her move.... and she asked my plans and i told her that i am going to a movie... :sad: Link to comment
grymoire Posted May 15, 2009 Author Share Posted May 15, 2009 So you'll try next week. next week it is! i am gonna ask her for lunch next week and during lunch i am gonna either: 1) ask for her phone number or 2) ask what is doing in the weekend and ask if she would be interested in a movie or hike my gut feeling says to go for #2 instead of phone number Link to comment
hers Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 I'd prefer to be asked out again instead of for my phone number. I mean, when you have a girl's number what do you do with it??? Talk on the phone like you did in high school? I would much rather be asked on a date where we could get to know each other instead of being on the phone trying to do just the same thing. Link to comment
Mutley Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 I'd prefer to be asked out again instead of for my phone number. I mean, when you have a girl's number what do you do with it??? Talk on the phone like you did in high school? I would much rather be asked on a date where we could get to know each other instead of being on the phone trying to do just the same thing. You ask for the phone number to test the waters. If she refuses, has some kind of lame excuse why she can't give it to you then you know your dead in the water. Once you have the phone no, it's 50/50 chance that she will go out. Many women would think asking for a date straight up like that is too fast. A man has got to pace himself. Link to comment
grymoire Posted May 15, 2009 Author Share Posted May 15, 2009 I'd prefer to be asked out again instead of for my phone number. I mean, when you have a girl's number what do you do with it??? Talk on the phone like you did in high school? I would much rather be asked on a date where we could get to know each other instead of being on the phone trying to do just the same thing. yep.. that's why i feel #2 is much better..... if she agress to spend time with me alone then that's a sure indication of her interest level Link to comment
grymoire Posted May 15, 2009 Author Share Posted May 15, 2009 You ask for the phone number to test the waters. If she refuses, has some kind of lame excuse why she can't give it to you then you know your dead in the water. Once you have the phone no, it's 50/50 chance that she will go out. Many women would think asking for a date straight up like that is too fast. A man has got to pace himself. ok.. let's assume i ask for her number and she gives it to me... now what? should i call the woman that i meet every day in person at work? Link to comment
bmwm3 Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 so are you saying not to ask her until she is just about to leave? wow this is in direct contrast with some advice here... specifically the ones that said i should ask her for lunch again soon.. I say this because i dont believe in dating and working together... i have seen to many people make an uncomftrable sitaution after the dating failed... thats why i said talk to her know and ask her out when her contract is up... in june right thats 2 weeks away... but i also see the advangtes of asking her now... i think you should go with what you feel and wanna do... youre the one talking to her and can gauge her intrest level the best.... Link to comment
Mutley Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 ok.. let's assume i ask for her number and she gives it to me... now what? should i call the woman that i meet every day in person at work? I don't know. This is probably an exception. Ask her straight out here. Link to comment
hers Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 I think if you've gone to lunch with her twice, asking what she's up to for the weekend and then saying let me know if you wanna hang out before she has time to say her plans and she says ok, that's when you'll know. I guess I just see asking foe the number as being very pointless. Link to comment
grymoire Posted May 15, 2009 Author Share Posted May 15, 2009 I have gone out for lunch with her only once. Link to comment
grymoire Posted May 15, 2009 Author Share Posted May 15, 2009 when we went for lunch i was talking about sky diving... i told her that i always want to try it but can never get any one to go with me... and she responded "i wish i can do sky diving with you but i am very very scared". does it say anything at all? Link to comment
bmwm3 Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 when we went for lunch i was talking about sky diving... i told her that i always want to try it but can never get any one to go with me... and she responded "i wish i can do sky diving with you but i am very very scared". does it say anything at all? it could be small flirting on her part... or it could just mean she always wanted to go skydiving... its not something i would really read into... i would be more looking for, if she is touchy feely or looks into eyes for a long time.. or laughs almost at all the jokes... Link to comment
grymoire Posted May 15, 2009 Author Share Posted May 15, 2009 it could be small flirting on her part... or it could just mean she always wanted to go skydiving... its not something i would really read into... i would be more looking for, if she is touchy feely or looks into eyes for a long time.. or laughs almost at all the jokes... she hasn't touched me yet.. but i have touched her couple of times and she doesn't say anything. she talks a lot, and smiles a lot. usually its me that ends the conversation and leaves. Link to comment
hers Posted May 15, 2009 Share Posted May 15, 2009 I have gone out for lunch with her only once. I meant by the time it comes around that you either ask her out on the weekend or for her number (whatever you decide on), you'll have gone to lunch with her twice (assuming you ask after your lunch date next week). I wouldn't read into the skydiving thing. It sounds like it's just small talk. Link to comment
grymoire Posted May 15, 2009 Author Share Posted May 15, 2009 I meant by the time it comes around that you either ask her out on the weekend or for her number (whatever you decide on), you'll have gone to lunch with her twice (assuming you ask after your lunch date next week). I wouldn't read into the skydiving thing. It sounds like it's just small talk. yea... somehow asking what's she up to during the weekend sounds better to me than reaching out for the phone number Link to comment
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