WANTED: Your ideas on how to trust

[Princess777]

I wanted to ask the forum for ideas on building trust with your partner. I don't mean after your partner has cheated or whatever, but rather with someone who has given you absolutely no reason not to trust them, and you just want to work on improving this part of yourself. What methods can be used to build trust, which is a fundamental part of our relationships, including marriages, and keep that trust, besides exhibiting trustworthy traits ourselves? Please be specific.

[abcd1234]

Before you can build trust with your partner you have to realise that it will take time, if does not come instantly, it is gradually built up.

 

You have to show them that you are a person who can be trusted and that you DO trust them. You have to be able to talk to your parter openly about what is on your mind and in turn, they will learn to trust you. They will begin opening up more and soon enough you will have built up a stable relationship because you can fully trust each other.

 

Hope this has helped

 

abcd1234 (its my 100th post, hooray!)

[mahlina]

I wanted to ask the forum for ideas on building trust with your partner. I don't mean after your partner has cheated or whatever, but rather with someone who has given you absolutely no reason not to trust them

I will NEVER trust anyone who double crosses me. That might be my flaw, but it's just my instincts to protect myself.

 

In terms of trust, starting on a relationship, clean slate, without any resentment, trust builds over time. It's not like it's something instant. Although, there are some guys who I intuitively trust. I think that it's this instant connection, so I base it on instinct, and how well we bond.

 

In terms of 'Method':

I really don't think that there is one, all except to just be yourself, let things flow, and respect your partner. Don't try too hard to impress. If so, then the relationship is not worth investing.

 

A healthy and strong relationship should be based on the 'gift' of friendship itself. It's about enjoying each other's company. If people have to go out of their way to prove a friendship, or a relationship, then it does not sound natural. It sounds more forced than anything. It just seems fake. But a simple gesture will do. Like being supportive of each other during a time of need, or just in general.

 

For me, it's simple: TRUST=HONESTY=RECPRICAL FRIENDSHIP=TIME= SELFLESSNESS=GENUINE SINCERITY, and CHEMISTRY.

[Nifty_Swifty1]

Trust is a hard thing. it's something completely unnatrual. What it comes down to is a choice. Noone can ever "prove" themselvs trustworthy becouse you never see what goes on when you are not there. You simply have to decide that you believe that person cares enough about you to aviod doing something you would disaprove of. That is after all what love is. It's putting someone else before yourself. Thats the deep part of life. If you only are concerned with you and yourslef life is so very shalow. If you find someone that will put you above all else you are truley blessed. That is something you only seem to find once in a lifetime. If you don't believe that person would put you first and formost... Well, that wouldn't be a place I would wan't to put myself.

 

God Bless

[woopsydaisy]

Great topic.....it amazes me how common this topic is and how essential trust is in relationships and life.I think ( as others have said) trust needs to be built up over time and has to be earned. People are a pain in the *** sometimes and they let you down and its so disheartening... and there is many diffrent levels to this.. depending on the type of relationship you have with the other person, persons, or most importantly yourself.I find that the issue of trust is sooooooo complex and in intimate relationships in particular.I have been in relationships were in the past an individual cheated on their partner and blown the whole issue with trusting themselves not to commit adultery... and then that issue has manifested into a new relationship in the way of not trusting their loved one (me) and spolilt it from the beginning, because that very person had made a mistake..such a shame.

I think the important part about trust issues is finding out why you dont trust a certain person..is it something they have done or is it something what has happened in the past, and your worried that they might let you down.And then dealing with that, and letting it go if possible..and working with thease issues with your current partner so he or she can understand you and help you deal with it.