Dreams of Ex

[Tears May Fall]

I have dreams of my ex ALL THE TIME!! They usually involve me somehow running into her, sometimes with her new boyfriend, sometimes with us happening to mess around again, sometimes us getting back together. Its very mind boggling and disturbing when I wake up and have to face reality that I did not see her again. ( We broke up a while ago, but I cant get over here still)

 

When I was in relationships, Id almost never have pleasant dreams of the current partner, but rather dreams that I was getting caught in an act of adultery or lying.

 

I almost never have pleasant dreams though. I still dream of my late father coming back to life and knocking at the door. I have dreams that I get into car accidents. Dreams that I get very hurt and end up in the hospital (injured, paralyzed, etc). Dreams that I get arrested or in trouble with the law. I have dreams that im killing people. I have dreams that I am commiting suicide or get chased to the point where I give up and get killed, although I can never recollect the time of death and usually wake up right before im actually killed.

 

Just last week, I had a dream I was being arrested for a DWI after crashing into a cop car.

 

My dreams are disrupting my life. I sometimes dont want to go to sleep because im afraid of my dreams. Other times when im having a pleasant dream (lets say me and the ex getting back together) I dont wanna wake up outta bed because id rather remain in my dreams. Its all disturbing because its tough to face and discern from reality thereafter. Its just that it all feels so real. Obviously my dreams are not in my control, but I feel the subconscious mind has a strange link with reality and your day to day thoughts.

 

Anyone have similar dreams? Or thoughts on these dreams im having?

[sternship]

* * * * ive had exactly the same dreams and don't know what to make of them.....it's frustrating isn't it but then what can you do about it? it's in the past i suppose and you will always remember something from it. i don't know what to say other than that i think it's quite normal to have that type of dream....man best of luck with it all

[tin_tin]

Totally. This week ive been having some weird dreams

 

 

I had a dream last night about the ex.

 

We were driving in my car along a country road, the road was slippery and i was trying to keep the car on the road.

Then we got out the car, left it there. Then started walking together.

 

 

Must mean something

[Considerate Empath]

This is very normal. I, too, have a very active "dream life" and quite good memory of most of my dreams, even though most slip away from me. Your dreams, I would assume, is a part subconscious part conscious decision about desire to keep it as or remove it from your memory while you're still half-asleep. This is only a theory of course, but if the previous holds true I would also think that some dreams - bad dreams or nightmares to the most part - that makes you wake up suddenly makes you more prone to remembering them.

 

...but I feel the subconscious mind has a strange link with reality and your day to day thoughts. ...

 

Of course your dreams are linked to the events and thoughts of your day to day life. Your dreams are basically your subconscious mind showing or telling you (most often, obviously, you have to interpret it right to understand "you") your innermost fears and hopes - and all it's got to work with is whats stuck in your memory and imagination, for example what you've seen, done, and thought of. The function of your subconscious is simply to guide and help you towards what you want the most, as well as to warn you of possible future events.

 

However, you do have some control of your own dreams. Sometimes you can choose to replay memories (to see loved ones again or be reminded of happier times, to be reminded of their deaths because to forget is to insult their memory, to simply, ironically, be reminded of reality and have some tough love) or choose to act out in your dreams to get it out of your system or just because you can - in contrary to the real world. You can also (the classic) choose to escape the boring, harsch, hectic or pleasant reality by maybe manipulating scenes and faces of certain movies or fantasies you have on your mind to make you the hero or villain of the story.

 

This is all very theoretical, of course, though derived out of common sense for me. The dreams I have are usually about me learning to fly or some very weird stuff I'd rather not get into The ones I like the most are those of the rarest kind in my book - the ones in which I am conscious and in total control of the dreamworld. My creativity usually don't follow though, so usually I just close my eyes in the dream and make myself wake up.

 

Who knows though, maybe, if you consider every thought and piece of memory a bee and your brain as a hive, the bees that choose to rest and the very bottom (being the most desirable resting ground, they fight over it and the strongest group gets it (or simply first come first served?)) makes out the details of your dream?

 

To fear is to worry. To worry is to prepare. To prepare is to control. To control is an illusion. The sooner you let go of the illusion of control the sooner you can let go of your fears. Sorry if this seems confusing and unhelpful, but to quote Rubeus Hagrid of the Harry Potter universe: What's comin' will come, an' we'll meet it when it does.

 

Don't stay miserable and dwell on what was versus what is now in comparison. It is harder, I know, but you have to move on with your life, otherwise it will destroy you. Remember on the good times you had with your ex, but rather than living there while reminding yourself that those times are no more - focus on making precious, new memories that are just as happy, if not happier, than your previous ones. Good memories can save your life.

 

I apologize for the length of this reply and the many clichés

 

 

Best wishes,

 

//C.E.

[Considerate Empath]

Totally. This week ive been having some weird dreams

 

 

I had a dream last night about the ex.

 

We were driving in my car along a country road, the road was slippery and i was trying to keep the car on the road.

Then we got out the car, left it there. Then started walking together.

 

 

Must mean something

 

Can mean loads of things, it's up to you to interpret it as you're the one with all the details of your life

 

I'd say the car represent your relationship though and more slippery the road gets the closer the relationship comes to end. That could mean either your relationship as a couple or the relationship you have now. The ending where you walk off together could mean that you either want to stay friends or an impulse, semi-conscious thought of your relationship being like a movie and you two walking off into the sunset seems like a happy ending. Maybe you want her back? Like I said - only you can tell

 

 

//C.E.