Faking an orgasm?

[CrazyKarl13]

Hi.. I don't mean to sound rude or what not.. but my boyfriend has never made me come to an orgasm. I kind of feel bad because he tries so hard and there really isn't too much he can do.

 

As bad as it sounds.. I wanted to know what some ways are that you can fake an orgasm. Like what kind of sounds do you have to make or what usually happens when you do? Also, do girls usually squirt anything when they orgasm.. I heard that some do.

 

One last thing, what does an orgasm feel like? When im having sex i feel like i get really intense butterflies and I'm not sure if that means im close.. or it's just pleasureable. And as far as the clit goes - when he rubs it a lot i feel that's uncontrollable and i automatically try to pull it away because it is too much to handle. What do i do? Let him go.. ?although it feels kinda of weird/nice at the same time.. Sorry its hard to explain lol But any advice would be grateful

[The Morrigan]

Honestly - I'd do a little "self exploration" yourself and find out what feels good when you do it - you'll be able to recognize the sensation of coming close to an orgasm after you've had one. You might be coming close when you get that uncontrollable feeling - but it can be hard to let go when it's still unfamiliar. It's pretty unusual to orgasm during intercourse without any other stimulation for a girl, regardless of what porn can lead both guys and girls to believe - so I'd seriously ask around here for some masturbation tips, find out what "works" for you, and then show him - he'll be a lot more appreciative if he knows what you like and knows he can give it to you than if he realizes you're not getting the same level of satisfaction he is. And it'll leave you feeling a whole lot more enthusiastic about sex knowing you can both give each other that level of pleasure.

[Frodo Baggins]

The funny thing is, many guys have never seen a female orgasm. At least not in person, so basically anything you do to fake it will be good enough. Guys are easy creatures to encourage; intense "participation" is more than enough, louder moaning, faster breathing, tensing up, basically the more intense you become, the more a guy is likely to think a woman is having an orgasm. It can get "messy," but it's not often the case, and he probably won't be expecting it, so don't worry if there isn't any "squirting." Just look like you're really into it, and he'll be fine. It'll buy you time until you find out for yourself what a true orgasm feels like, then you can pass that info on to him, and he can help get you to that level for real, and you won't need the act as much anymore.

[CrazyKarl13]

thank you soo much for all of your help! and yes, i don't want to fake it for long because i think it's wrong.. but i still need time to figure things out. i know it sounds like a stupid question, but i really do not know what it's going to feel like when i orgasm. i think maybe sometimes my boyfriend is too direct when he touches the clit and touches it right on, instead of around it, to the point where i can't take it anymore. does that sound like a possiblity? also when i get like some kind of cramping or major butterflies.. or to where it feels like i have to pee.. is that coming close? lol i really dont know what im doing. im such a nerd!!!!

[Ash]

Do yourself a big favour and don't fake it. It doesn't really get you anywhere, and if (and when) he finds out, you'll both be really upset I think. There are some parts that are very difficult to fake, and unless you've actually had one, you won't know what they are. And even if you have had one, you might not be aware of it.

 

By all means, get excited, and do all those things Frodo said to do, except the tensing up part.

 

From what you say, have him try some less direct contact. If you get to the point of not being able to take it, and the majot butterflies feelings, then why don't you take over from him and see if you can finish it? At least the first time or two until you get the hang of it. Then he should be able to take you all the way.

 

But for sure, keep working on having one, and try to avoid faking.

[in_the_mirror]

omg i thought it was just me who had the problem but me and my b/f have figured out that when he gives me oral that i orgasm. the clit thing is exactly the same with me and his fingures may be to much pressure down there. im sorry if this grosses you out but a tongue is a lot nicer and can get you to come. i wouldn't fake it cuz that just might make him upset if he finds out. hope this helps

[Derek]

As others have said, it is totally normal for women to not get off on just "normal" intercourse.

Especially the missionary position with guy on top which seems to be the default alot of people do, ironically is a poor position for the woman.

There is another way of doing the missionary position which can work,

but it is rather involved. (Coital Alignment Technique is the technical term)

 

Most people recommend a women learn the orgasm by herself before

expecting it to work in the bedroom.

Adding in other things like oral and foreplay first with other things helps the woman get warmed up before even getting close to the intercourse part. Different positions as well.

 

BTW, you mentioned feeling like you had to pee, well I am surprised that no one else mentioned that that is a normal feeling for a g-spot orgasm,

(like if you had pee'd just before sex, then get that feeling again so fast, you know it is something else) Women feel like they have to bear down

and burst when they orgasm and it isn't pee at all.

It can take some trust, but for that you just let it all hang out and don't

worry about cleaning the sheets til later on. Read up about G-spot

orgasms.

 

 

[kome]

PLease do not fake it. When he finds out he will be so depressed even more than he is right now.

 

Faking it makes us males feel very very insecure about or sexuality and crap.

 

Just let him keep trying and chugging on until he gets the spot.

 

but just for you im gonna tell you a scret about your body. You have a female "prostrate" that resides between the urethra and the upper vaginal wall. He might have to finger you because it is a very hard spot ot hit.

You can try to do it your self. Lay down on uyour back, insert your index and middle fingers into your vagina. Make a come here motion towrds the upper part of your vaginal wall until you get a certain spot of it all nice and hard. This is your G-spot! Once you find it tell him fast so that you can have hours on end of hot sexual intercourse!

[geeknerd]

i would tell him what you are experiencing and tell him how he could "improve". dont fake it tho

[boxcar1134]

hey there, i had the same problem as you. no matter how hard my boyfriend tried he couldn't help me orgasm. i thought about faking it but then i didn't want to hurt his feelings. so we kept trying and trying. it's all a matter of practice and finding out what you like. it also helps when you find your G-spot. just keep at it. practice with him and also by yourself. be very vocal and let him know what you like and don't like.

 

 

hope that helps......

[neva_black_n_white]

in my opinion, i wouldnt fake it. i mean for starters its kind of wrong like you said. and its not too nice a thing to do, even though it would be easy to get away with. for seconds what would you do if he honestly thought then that was what pleasured you but in all honesty you would like to notch it up a factor.

 

i mean what would you do, suddenly not become stimulated by it, and him think, hhm whats going on here. id be honest and tell him what you like. as said before, explore your own body so you can apply these findings to him. also if you talk to him whilst your doing this, tell him where it feels great, how to get it better, if you want it harder, faster and all the essntials to you having a good time. then you'll get there.

 

how do you feel about him going down on you? that works a treat.

 

kel

[SAVage20]

Wow, I thought I was the only one that has never had an orgasm. I am also wondering what one feels like. Whenever I do a little business with a vibrator, it feels great! At the end, I "pee" (is it pee? is it something else? I don't know)... I would say it's an orgasm, but I didn't feel the "waves of pleasure" that everyone's talking about. And I'm not tired or anything either. I don't scream or thrash around. My husband is getting kinda upset with me for not being able to have one. He says he feels less like a man. I feel so bad sometimes! Anyway, if anyone could offer any words of encouragement or support or anything, it'd be appreciated...

[neva_black_n_white]

random fact of the day, for all those who want to fake.

 

my twin has just informed me, to fake an orgasm you can burn more calries than having a real one. so other than wanting to loose weight i protest because of moral issues. good look girlies and men.

 

kel

[The Captain]

tell him that you cant orgasm and ask him to provide clitoral stimulation as well