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Gave a Girl My Contact.....Advice needed


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So over the weekend I was at a bar. I showed up like 3 hours after my friends had been there and they were already drunk. One friend got the idea that he wanted to hook his other friend up that night so he pointed out a group of girls and said "I'm going to get us 3 pitchers of beer. You walk over and tell them that we want to drink with them and we are buying." So I was chosen as being the "wingman" to walk over with him so it didn't look too akward. They were out celebrating their friends 25th B-day and they accepted and we started drinking and chatting. I hit it off with one of the girls and we talked for like an hour or so. She said the other guys were nice but she could tell they were drunk. I told her how I got suckered into this and this isn't usually how I go about meeting people and we both laughed.


Me and one friend had to run as we were going to a ball game that night. The weather was kind of iffy so she told me that I should come back if the game gets rained out. I shook her hand and told her how it was a pleasure to meet and talk with her. We walked out and I thought to myself "ehhh why not?" I wrote down my name and email on a piece of paper and ran back in and gave it to her. I said "Hey we are taking off but I wanted to give you my contact if you want to get in touch with me. If not, that's cool too but I had fun talking and didn't want to let this opportunity pass. Have a great night girls and say Happy B-Day to your friend for me." Boom, turned around and left.


I was wondering if any girls on here thought that was a cool way to go about it. Should I have asked her for her contact instead and not gave her mine and put it on her to see if she's interested? That was Sat. night and it's now Wed. morning and she hasn't gotten in touch with me. Think she's not interested? Or maybe she isn't used to a guy giving her his number. I never seem to have any luck lately and I am wondering if I did something wrong.



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I said "Hey we are taking off but I wanted to give you my contact if you want to get in touch with me. If not, that's cool too but I had fun talking and didn't want to let this opportunity pass. Have a great night girls and say Happy B-Day to your friend for me." Boom, turned around and left.


Hey buddy,


Two things:


1. She might be following the traditional three day rule, so there's a chance she might call.


2. Personally, I think you should have been more direct when you gave her your number and said something like: “I had a great time talking to you, here’s my number. Call me and maybe (insert something that was said in the conversation).” Then just smile and walk away.


You shouldn’t have said it would be OK if she didn’t call you – makes it look like you expect her not to which tells her you might not have a lot of confidence. Remember, girls are attracted to guys who are self-assured and confident (not cocky) with themselves.

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Most of the time, if you give a girl your contact details she won't get back to you. Next time... get her number instead!


Not true (well maybe for shy girls). She will not get back to you if she wasn't interested. But I do tend to always get there numbers depending on the circumstances.

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I've done my fair share of meeting guys in the bar when I was single, and when I read your story I saw nothing wrong with it. I put myself in that girls shoes and I had a smile on my face when I was finished reading it! I think it's great what you did!!

So one of two things is going on:


1. She's going to call you, but doesn't want to look to needy.


2. She has a boyfriend or some other good reason for not taking things any further. She was out for a good time with her friends, met a great guy, but in the morning she's got her boyfriend, and her life, and it was just a one night thing that she cannot take any further. (she was just letting loose for the one night)


Either way, it's nothing you did wrong. You played it totally cool and it would have won me over!!

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Personally I don't like putting my fate in the hands of others so I would've gotten her number. You could just outrght ask her for it. Also a good way to do it would've been to do this (credit Neil Strauss). Before you left and without saying anything, take out a pen and paper and write your number down but leave space underneath it. Tear it off and then hand her the blank piece and the pen only. It is then implied that she will give you her number and then trade.

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LOL so far all the guys have told me I did things wrong and the one girl said I did things right. What's wrong with this picture???? ](*,)


Ha ha, probably because every guy is on your side of the fence, whereas I'm on the other!!

Honestly though, I'm talking through experience. I'm an attractive girl, who had a few years of single life (dated here and there) in the bar with a lot of experience meeting men.


Unless this girl is incredible shallow (in which case you do not want her anyway), there is no way that she's going to chat it up with you, be flirty, and have a great time with you just to completely get turned off by you giving her your contact info it makes no sense!! I mean come on, you spend an hour getting to know each other, she really is into you, then something as simple as giving her your info and asking her to contact you if she'd like is going to completely change her impression of you?? Not likely. If I hit it off with a guy and he gave me his number, for sure I'll call him - if I want to persue something further. What you did has nothing to do with her not calling.


Seriously, it's one of the two things I mentioned in my earlier post, mark my words. If she doesn't call, it's not because of anything you did wrong, but she may be one of those girls who was just out 'playing' for the night, but really has no interest in a further relationship. I used to meet great guys, and have a lot of fun that night, but then not call them because I was not interested in a relationship.

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Thanks haha. That makes me feel a bit better. It's not the fact that I really want to pursue anything with this particular girl, it's more of a "I thought we hit it off and I will see if she is actually interested in getting to know me"....I never have given or have got contact from just meeting a girl at a bar. I was in a relationship with a girl for 6 years and then for 2 and a half. Things may still work out with the 2 and a half one, but we are taking a break so I just wanted to test the waters and see if I "still have it" LOL...


Well, her friends were giggling and I asked them what and they said that I looked like someone to them. So jokingly I was like "what I look like your younger brother?" And they were like "No you look like someone we know. Trust me you would be flattered if you saw him." So I guess they thought I was attractive.

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I think I would be too nervous to call YOU, would much rather give my number to them... but she may still call. You gave her email too yeh? I would def email tho, wouldnt be too nervous to do that. Maybe she is waiting nearer the weekend?


If I were you, I'd go to the bar again to try and see her again if you can, that would really impress me! then you can get her digits!


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I wouldn't call a guy who gave me his number. If a guy were interested in me, I would expect him to get my number and call me. That is how it has always worked for me my entire dating life. But hey, that's just me. It may not be how she is.

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I'm confused...if you have a gf why are you giving other girls your number?


LOL long story. We are on a "break" now because she said she was confused and felt her feelings were changing wasn't sure if she was "in love" with me etc. She wanted some space. We are starting to hang out again, but nothing is set in stone. I am just keeping my options open. Like I said, my giving my emai to this girl was just a kind of fun thing to see if she was actually interested and to see if I am able to meet girls at bars and stuff should I really have to enter the "single life" if there is no reconciliation with my GF.

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