Very good excuse required

[allypally]

Hi,

 

Can anyone think of a very good excuse as to why I can't make it to the cinema tonight with my ex.

 

Bear in mind he has already paid for the tickets.

 

Or if I did go, how should I handle it? He will be upbeat because he is about to go off on a lads weekend with lots of attractive women to boot, DJ each night, parties, sun, you get the picture.

 

 

Thanks.

[headunderwater]

Umm why were you going to go in the first place and why is it you don't want to go now?

 

Just tell him you changed your mind.

[Weeblie]

Well, why don't you want to go? Just cause the next day he's going to hang out with a bunch of people at an event that might have attractive women there? Are you worried about being jealous of him? Worried about getting attached?

 

Personally, I'd go to the cinema, have an awesome time with him. Flirt, joke around, and enjoy the show. End the night in a friendly kind of way and go on with my life. I'd make sure that I go to the event with no expectations from him and leave with no expectations, so that way I don't get my hopes up and I'm able to relax and be myself.

[bronte]

I guess you could tell him you're not feeling well--but I really think all the excuse you need is that he's your ex and you don't want to do it!

[tangi39]

Just say "It's too uncomfortable" for you. He can ask someone else to join him.

 

If you're broken up and don't want to see him as a friend- Then I see no reason not to just be upfront and honest. Just say you'd rather not go.

If he doesn't understand, too bad.

[hamsalad]

Well, why don't you want to go? Just cause the next day he's going to hang out with a bunch of people at an event that might have attractive women there? Are you worried about being jealous of him? Worried about getting attached?

 

Personally, I'd go to the cinema, have an awesome time with him. Flirt, joke around, and enjoy the show. End the night in a friendly kind of way and go on with my life. I'd make sure that I go to the event with no expectations from him and leave with no expectations, so that way I don't get my hopes up and I'm able to relax and be myself.

 

Make the best of this event and when he's gone off with the lads, use that time to reflect and maybe even make a final decision on what you want to do with the relationship.

[allypally]

Just getting cold feet really. He has been contacting me every day. As I have said in previous posts he has been carrying on as though there has been no break up and pulling out the stops.

 

Just don't really feel like going, although the film is the new Indiana Jones one, it could be a bitter sweet experience.

[hamsalad]

Just getting cold feet really. He has been contacting me every day. As I have said in previous posts he has been carrying on as though there has been no break up and pulling out the stops.

 

Just don't really feel like going, although the film is the new Indiana Jones one, it could be a bitter sweet experience.

 

Hmm, now that I think about my last post, maybe I was wrong. Perhaps just shut if off altogether and make a clean break. See that movie with some good friends instead?

 

I don't want you to be yanked like a yo-yo. Be good to yourself!

[qwerty1984]

it depends if you're expecting things from him or if you think he is from you and what you both want....

 

if you want nothing and you're both trying to move on, tell him you have a date!!!

 

good luck!

[allypally]

Querty, thats an idea except we had already agreed to go to the cinema a few days ago and he also booked the tickets a few days ago!

[hamsalad]

What's the cost of a ticket compared to your sanity?

[allypally]

Lately, nothing. As it is I have to work late.

 

1) should I stand him up so he'll leave me alone? Personally, I wouldn't want someone to do that to me so think this is a bad idea.

2) should I just trot out the standard and lame 'have to work late' excuse?

3) Or should i tell him to ask his potential gf along instead of me??

[hamsalad]

Don't stand him up. Not classy no matter the situation.

 

Don't lie.

 

Tell him you just don't feel up to it. The truth. If he asks why, just tell him.

[Weeblie]

Ok, I guess I'll be doing some backtracking also. This is the guy that you broke up with in the other thread, right? Didn't you ask for some space too?

 

It sounds like he's back to being all clingy. So I'd just call him up and cancel. As for an excuse...I like Tangi's suggestion of just being upfront and honest. You don't feel like going, you don't feel like going.

[allypally]

Yes, this is the guy i broke up with and asked for some space - so yes, he has been being clingy and going out of his way to 'make things right' so it would seem - just too damn late.

 

Have an hour to go before I'm due to meet him so quite short notice, however the film doesn't start until 2100hrs UK time!

[qwerty1984]

tell him you're gonna be late, but still go and only do the cinema part, not the pre drinks/dinner - then you don't have to talk, but you're still doing what you said you would

 

maybe don't make plans next time unless you're sure??

[Weeblie]

Short notice or not, cancel! Don't feel guilty about it. What's the point in spending an evening with someone you really don't want to be around right now? Like hamsalad's been saying, take care of yourself.

[allypally]

Querty, that sounds good like good thinking to me! The only thing is he lives 45 mins on the other side of the town where I live, however, it still gives him enough time to get something to eat and get back into town again.

 

All I can say is, it seemed like a good idea at the time as I wanted to see the film.

[hamsalad]

We all have our opinions here and like to help, but it really is up to you.

 

Just think and do what you want to make yourself happy.

[allypally]

Would rather have a quiet night in continuing my unpacking, so will cancel!

[hamsalad]

Would rather have a quiet night in continuing my unpacking, so will cancel!

 

I am glad you were able to make a choice, whatever it was going to be.

 

Relax and enjoy yourself.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

If you were going to meet someone and they cancelled on you at the last minute..would you be happy? I think it is very rude to cancel on someone at the last minute for no good reason. You committed yourself for selfish reasons (wanted to see the movie) and now you will cancel for selfish reasons. Whatever happened during the relationship is immaterial...it is not a very nice thing to do to cancel on someone at the last minute just because you don't feel like being in there company. Suck it up, go to the movie and then don't bother socializing with him ever again after this. You made a commitment and it is rather late to back out now. It would have been a different matter if you had chosen to back out a couple of days ago.

[trash mail]

the truth never hurts, it just empowers.

[arcadefire]

I would just go. Any other excuse will just hurt him, I feel, since you broke up with him. While you are there with him, act platonic, and then afterwards if he asks you out for another time then you can say that you can't because you asked for a break.

[tulip rose]

Simply tell him you dont want to go. You broke up with him?

Why on earth would you have said you would go in the first place? You've torn his heart out, don't let him think he can get it back. This whole thing is kind of selfish from wo to go.