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HELP!! What does this mean! I really, really need advice th


JaimeNLuv
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Ok I am a little flustered. As some of you know, I was dating a guy when out of the blue he tells me that he was frustrated about chemistry and said we could be friends. Well, I emailed him about a plan that we had made a week before Thanksgiving. He replied "Thanks cut I can't I received my military orders so I am gone for 2 weeks. I apologize for not answering your emails lately but I think it is for the best. I hope you understand" Did he say that because I was argumentative and he didn't want to argue? Or is it because he wants nothing to do with me and is ignoring me?

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write him back saying "oh ok no problem i understand, when your ready to accommodate yourself with me than you contact me"

 

 

and move on, Jaime listen if you sound eager to get something together, especially after a Break off, your not making it seem like your keeping your end of the "space" to an equal, you need to give someone that, even if you don't want too. it's almost out of respect for that persons feelings, put yourself in his shoes for a sec...i guess is what I'm trying to say is would you enjoy that feeling of being "pressured" into getting back together. answer that truthfully to yourself and i think you have a answer before you..

 

can't say is he is ignoring you, he just might be playing the game we discussed in another post..or it could be to protect himself from getting hurt. from you i can't say because i don't know the situations or details to what you 2 had. hopefully it will be something you can again have back. but time is crucial, and good things come to those who wait.

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I know you are right. Basically I had replied that I understand and that I accept the friendship offer. Than I waited a couple of days and wrote a long letter explaining my feelings and that if he wanted to try again in a few months that is fine but yes, it would be best if we began as friends and move at that pace slowly. If not that is fine and that I appreciated the time that we had and the friendship that we had together. That was a week ago and I haven't messaged or anything since. I still have his birthday gift and I am just thinking about waiting about a month to give it to him. I bought it about 3 weeks before this happened. I figure I will just swing by and tell him I was just in the neighborhood and wanted to drop it off. No chit chat and just be like I am in a hurry so I can read his body language. If he gives me the signs like "oh god why is she here?" than I will keep on moving on. I have been dating. It just seems weird. As for what we had, it may have been short lived but we were very close and he had planned on introducing me to his father. I already met his sisters and all of his friends. I felt very intimidated by his family, he has his masters and working towards a PhD I think, his father is a retired Doctor and his sister is an attorney. I have very little education although I am going back to college to finish up my nursing degree...I am a single mom. He knew about the pregnancy before we met and was really excited to meet her.

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I dated and am getting over a breakup much in the same fashion, also with someone in the military.

 

Mine pretty much did the same thing to me, stating that he found someone else to date and that he appreciated our friendshiop and the things we did together. He met my mother, his brother knew about me and the such. I'm beginning to think that he bolted because he was the one freaked out of the commitment, and the fact that we were getting closer. Mine dumped me via email too, which made him more of a schmuck.

 

I am sad because I miss his friendship and the connection we had, we also only dated for a while (2 months). I've done a lot of soul searching and decided that I really dont think that it was me, yes we were compatible and we got along great, but the main thing sounds like he couldnt communicate how he was feeling. I know my ex couldnt. That is something that they need to face on their own. You cant help them at all on it, which sometimes sucks.

 

What you need to ask yourself, is this someone you would want in your life as a friend? I mean friends lean on each other in times of need. If he bolts when you need him as a friend, I wouldnt consider him as friend worhty material. Cause no one likes to deal with a flaky friend.

 

I think that you have reached out as much as you can to be a friend. You will be albe to see in a while if he is able to ante up and be a friend back.

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