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hello

 

my girlfriend has been asking me a lot about my past and such. i've gone out with two girls (one serious) and it always bothers her. sometimes she asks me questions about what they did with me in terms of being with me. she also knows how much i felt for them and i always tell her that i don't feel ANYTHING at all for them anymore. and that i mean what i say to her, and i do. very much

 

sometimes it bothers her so much and i try to comfort her. i feel really bad when it happens and i always don't know how to feel or act when she does ask me questions like that

 

any advice?

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Your girl (obviously) has insecurity issues.....if she's asking what your past relationship was like, it's most likely because she wants to see how she compares or measures up, or wants to make sure she doesn't make the same mistakes they did so you don't break up with her. Just a guess, but if she's THAT centered on the subject, that'd be my guess as to why.

 

Let her know that those relationships are in the PAST for you, and that you're not comfortable with her pumping you for information about them, since they obviously didn't work. Let her know that you are concentrating on the here and now, and HER, and that your past relationships have no bearing on the one you have with her, and that it shouldn't be such a concern to her. Or ask her gently WHY she's so concerned. Granted, a lot of partners will ask their guy/girl questions about the "ex", but just out of idle curiosity at best, not with such intensity!

 

I'm going to go with the insecurity thing, myself. If she DOES have insecurity issues, she'll ultimately have to work those out for herself, but let her know that you're not comfortable with being asked on a somewhat regular basis about your past relationships, and that THIS one is the one you want to work on!

 

Mar

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