i'm confused..i need some advice please

[kdseymen]

Hi everyone,

 

I've been with my girlfriend for 16 months in total and at one point she broke up with me for all the good reasons. I don't blame her for doing that. I deserved it. We got back together and everything has been great. We truly love each other. We talked about our past relationships briefly in the past and that was it, we never opened the subject. We were satisfied with what he had...She recently told me that she had a casual relationship during our 6 month break-(3 months after we broke up) with her friend ..The problem is she didn't tell this to me when we started again although we asked each other about our break..She told me that she's not into casual affairs and don't do them. She says she regrets what happened and she was embrassed to tell me about it and she's never done anything like that in her life before..I was disappointed but I tried to understand it..she's a human being as well..I feel like I have to lower my expectations and get to know her again..If she told that to me from the beginning, I would have been over it by now and much easier...We didn't talk recently and I miss her...but i feel like she lied to me to hide who she really is..I was very open and she wasn't..I am not asking her any questions about her affair and I won't!! I just want to make sure that her affair with her friend was completely over when we started again..and she said yes over and over again..i believe her and i'm not going to question her about it..she's very sweet, loving girl with an awesome career..

 

i am happy with her and want to make this work..and i've done casuals before..but she knew it...i don't know how I should feel..i am not going to break up with her but i need to clear my mind and to move on

 

any suggestions? girls and guys

[Whiplash Girl Child]

If you want to be with her, then you're going have to get over it, because you can't change what happened. Can't change the past, can't change what she did.

 

If it was a mistake that she feels that she made, then fine, people make mistakes.

 

But also keep in mind that people do change.

 

 

If her past behavior is something you can't look past, or forget (which you should do, since, like I said, it won't go away and cannot be changed), then you shouldn't be with her. Be real to yourself. Only you know if you can live your life knowing that she (dare I say it!) hooked up with someone casually (And yes, I was just being sarcastic.)

 

Move on to more important things, and don't turn molehills into mountains.

[SnoopyLove]

It wasn't an affair.. You weren't together at the time.

Forget about it.

[george237]

I agree you wern't together get over it.

[ghost69]

you weren't together. she owes you no explanation. nothing but yourself is keeping this in your head. get over it.