confused_guy84 Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Well, i just found out that not only is my ex seeing someone new, but she's madly in love with him, and he's moving accross the country to be with her (complete with pictures of them kissing, nice). I feel like i'm going to throw up. So ya, learn from my mistakes, dont go on facebook. I just unfriended her and blocked her on aim. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 how long have you two been broken up? Link to comment
confused_guy84 Posted January 26, 2008 Author Share Posted January 26, 2008 Together for a little over 1.5 years, broke up 5 months ago. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 I'm sorry that you are having a tough time with this but she has moved on and so should you. It's hard to see you ex with someone else, I know, but it's good that you are now letting go by blocking her, etc. You have to let yourself heal. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Facebook is a mess. It'd be fine if were actually used by most people for the innocent stuff (old friends, blah blah blah) but it's used for so much now that's it's just crazy. Ditto instant messaging. Even though it's socially acceptable - it's like a tabloid! Except the ones being spied upon, know it and can manipulate things to give off a certain illusion of things. Weird. People make their own tabloid headings and pics. Remember: you only saw what she wanted you and others to see. That doesn't make it reality. And it's not the big picture. It's cruel to torture yourself with her fantasy version of herself. Cruel! Glad you learned the lesson. Sounds like a sucky way to learn. Link to comment
oldspice4me Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Yeah man. I hate facebook. And to think that she was the one that wanted me to get it. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 i got broken up over myspace. I really hate the cyber world when it comes to dating and always try to avoid contact over it. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Remember: you only saw what she wanted you and others to see. That doesn't make it reality. And it's not the big picture. It's cruel to torture yourself with her fantasy version of herself. Cruel! Yep! I totally agree! What she puts on facebook is only the "sugar coated" version of her life. Those sites have slideshows and all KINDS of stuff to make your page more interesting/colorfull. So it adds more to the "wow-effect" of portaying what her life is like. Then she can also choose what she shows to the world and what she doesn't. Of course she is gonna put up kissy pics and pics of them smiling. Heck, maybe she just put up every single one of them she could find.. But it doesn't mean they truly are madly in love. Some people just put them up to show off their new SO/their relationship. I was fixing up/updating myspace and I have only been with my bf 1 month. Yet... the way I set it up (not really my intention) I realised people would soooo get another impression and think we are madly in love already. Maybe it was the pics, maybe it's the theme I set for the page.. Everyone is just seeing the nice parts of my life on there. Link to comment
samantha20 Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 yep that happened to me. I had my ex telling her friends on facebook about how she's got 'a shiny new boyfriend' 6 days after we broke up. Hurt so much. Link to comment
Andy_2007 Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Think of this: Does she think you'd check her facebook page? That all the answer you need to know why she's put all that stuff up. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Oh yea.. that's soooo true.^^^ If I know (and yes she probably does know an ex is checking my facebook... chances are much higher that I will put as many pics up and lovey dovey up the page. Sorta like saying: "eat ya heart out now." Oh... OP was your situation the one where she moved away and ... who broke up with whom? If you broke up with her she is definitely gonna try and shove it in your face. You have a new gf too right? Maybe she figures your happy with yours so why shouldn't she be happy with her new SO. And if she broke up with you and is shoving it in your face, that's just plain mean/unthoughtfull. Link to comment
1HelluvaGirl Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Just say no to facebook/myspace! I know that checking out other people's lives is as addicting as crack, especially if they are an ex who has seemingly moved on from you. However, it's just a forum for a person to project a persona (how they want other people to see them, and not exactly how they are). I had a similar experience -- my fiance broke it off with me, and his new girl posted pics of them all over the web shortly after he left me (trips together, holiday parties with him in the suit he was going to wear to our wedding, etc.). It really was like a slap in the face to me, and I wish I had never seen those pics of them together. I have to remind myself that it is not REALITY. Yeah, there is some truth in pictures, but like other posters have said, people are real selective about what story they want to tell on there. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted January 26, 2008 Share Posted January 26, 2008 Yea.. /waves hands in the air and jumps up and down. Happened to me too. I think it made my break up the most painfull I have ever experienced. 3 Days after my first bf broke up with me, him and his new girl posted pics on msn, facebook, etc. And like an addict I kept going back to it. Instead of running the opposite direction from the fire lol I kept going straight into it. I never forgot that. Oh well. Link to comment
confused_guy84 Posted January 27, 2008 Author Share Posted January 27, 2008 Ya she moved accross the country. I was supposed to move with her a few months later when I finished school. Instead she moved and then dumped me over the phone a week later instead of telling me to my face. The rest of the story is pretty long and not really worth remembering anymore. You guys are right about facebook painting a pretty picture. It still hurts like hell though. No more of that crap, I've finally cut all ties. Link to comment
weephil Posted January 27, 2008 Share Posted January 27, 2008 Had sort of the same situation last few days. Ex-fiancee got back in touch with me in November last year after about 7 months of no contact. I'd pretty much got my head together before she got in touch and although I'd not found anyone else I was happy again. She had set up facebook and asked me to join so i did and she also was on messenger. Last few months we talked a lot over msn (she lives in a different country) and things started to feel like they used to, we both said we still had feelings etc...Last week though she was on-line and over messenger said she'd met someone and he was very special. Was a bit gutted to say the least. I'm glad and sad at the same time but have deleted all contact information and am now looking at a clean break again. Will take time as a lot of the old feelings have been dragged up again but will be fine eventually! Link to comment
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