I'm back and here is an update.

[Justaguy21]

Okay, I'm back. I was absent from these forums for about six months now. I went through a really bad break up with my ex girlfriend of three years. I took a lot of advice and unfortunately, played my cards right and wrong. I did the right things and I did the wrong things, I guess that's what lifes all about. Well anyways, I left these forums with me meeting my ex for the summer since she lives down here but goes to a different college, two hours away. Well, summer went great, at first, she was still very attracted to me since I went to the gym twice as much, got a tan, and so on. I was being very independent and went out with my buddies a lot more often.

 

She responded very well and soon wanted to date again, BAM, I'm in. Well I got too comfortable and she said i was moving to fast and expecting too much out of her so we went back to friends. We went back and forth like this 4 times throughout the summer. By the end of summer, I was so just fed up by pretty much dedicating my whole summer to her, that I was a broken man who just got annoyed with the presense of her. She started making out with guys she just met a party, and lying to me about it and then telling me the truth later and how she dosn't want me to think less of her.

 

The last day I saw her, we basically just fought and she said we should be friends but she dosn't know what is going to happen to us (Confused B.S.) and she didn't have time to talk because she had to go to some movie with some people she just met.(Being Selfish) Okay, well since that day, we have talked off and on, once a week and been just friends. Well I can't keep myself from telling her the truth and basically calmy and nicely tell her that I still want her back (Last Weekend) , she says she dosn't know what to say or what she wants STILL, and that she wants to be friends for right now and work from there. Well, I think it's a cop out so she can still meet other guys and have no responsibility but keep me on the back burner and so on but I seriously dont even know why I'm still talking to her.

 

She has some awesome points to her and the only thing I hate is that she is so unstable as a person. I've dated about two dozen women since her and met my share of pretty ladies but none have struck my interest to be exclusive with one of them. She isn't even that pretty and my buddies tell me all the time that I'm way out of her league but I'm so not superficial when I'm in love. I'm a great looking guy, going to med school, and pretty much got my path straight. So anyway, she tells me every week that I talk to her that she hasn't dated anyone since she has gotten back and that knowone strikes her interest there and has only kissed one guy at some dance but it meant nothing but then again she could be lying. My friends call me crazy and so does everyone else and maybe I just want her since she pretty much the only girl I can't get and it's driving me mad. My buddies tell me all the time that she is probably sleeping around with a bunch of dudes but I don't like to think of women my age being like that because I hate how guys can sleep with whomever and be cool but right when women do it they are sl*ts, which is so dumb.

 

Listen, I need advice, bad. I was doing so good until she told me that she wants to take things slow and now I think there is a chance. I could sit here and write a whole another page or two about more info about us but basically the situation is this. She broke up with me, we've been parted for about 7 months now, we dated off and on in the summer, stayed physical(which of course never helps) she went back to school and has a billion guy friends, says she misses me and how hot I'm but the idea of us still really scares her, she never wants to talk about us, says she's afraid I'll think less of her since "My view of her is more important then anyone elses and how she values my opinions of her over everyone" and I'm driving myself crazy here with thoughts of her.

 

Help me out my brothers and sisters and I apologize for all the gramatical errors,but I don't have time to proof read.

 

 

-Justaguy

[Guest]

Well, maybe she actually is still deciding what she wants. I could be wrong, but she does seem to be acting like it, for the most part. You are still getting the "special person" talk, so that's always a good sign. All I really have to say is just keep giving her time. Have hope, but don't get your hopes up. Keep positive, but don't expect anything.

 

About moving too fast. This is pretty expected when getting back together. Sometimes one person does, sometimes both, and sometimes neither do it. You feel as though you've already gotten to home plate, so why have to start at first base again? But, you just have to agree with her on that, in she's probably throwing out what's happened before, so that the new relationship is just that, new. I'm assuming you two didn't slee together the second week you knew eachtoher the first time you went out, and so the same things going on here. Its confusing, but it does make sense.