What to do ??

[Jonboy582]

Ok I am very confused at the moment, pretty much the short story is.

I broke up with my girlfriend of two years about 2 - 3 months ago, I then dated another girl for about a month which did not work out. My ex and I (first one) are still in love with each other but because of reasons that are long and cant be bothered to explain can't be with each other right now. So onto whats confusing.

 

1. I'm still in love with one girl

2. I can't stop thinking about the other

3. I am dating/seeing neither of them

 

This is all made worse by the fact I suffer from depression.

 

I think I have bought this confusion upon myself seeing someone else so soon after my previous relationship. At the time it seemed good I thought I was over my ex but I now know otherwise.

 

Anything anyone could say would be much appreciated.

 

Jon

[Celadon]

Well, Jon, I would say that you probably need some space to just "be." The thing is, DOING anything right now (even if that were possible, which it sounds like it's not) would probably only lead to more confusion. If your relationships with the two women are seriously over, the best thing is to spend time healing, reflecting on the good and the bad about each relationship, and even considering how you could improve in the next relationship.

 

If neither woman is pressuring you right now to DO anything, then it might be best to focus on getting out of your depression. That way, you'll be more ready for the next relationship that comes along. Are you seeing a counselor for the depression or taking any meds?

 

I hope things improve for you. Good luck.

[Jonboy582]

Thank you atleast someone replied

 

Well ex number one the thing is there is still something and she wants to be with me but she lacks experience and never been with another guy. To put it one way she believes/hopes we will be like Ross and Rach of friends. Get together have a couple of relationships in between and get back and happy in the end. Many people have told us we are stupid and perfect for each other. But I know for her to ever be happy she needs some space and to gain experience with other guys.

 

And as for the depression its been going on 2 years, I finally confided in 2 people 1 being my ex (2 weeks before we broke up) and 1 my best friend about 3 weeks ago. I made him promise me to force me to go to the Dr's to get treatment at the end of the Christmas holidays if I still have not got to a bearable level of depression. I asked him this as I know I would never get it done myself.

 

Oh as for the ex issue I know what you and most others are thinking. If she really loved you she would be contempt with what she has and all that. But in the end she does not know how to act due to her lack of experience. All she knows is people rarely end up with there first loves. And the people that have had a few years gaps in between i.e. Her Auntie and my big sister and Ross and Rach lol.

 

Well thats all for now

 

Jon