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i met her on the internet, i want us to be together


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i'm sorry if this is long or anything but i'm just looking for some insight and advice on my relationship.


well, right now i'd say the relationship with my girlfriend is now becoming evolved. i can definitely say we've been through a lot. i met her on the internet back in january and we've been friends and then we decided we felt feelings for eachother back in april. we've been together since. about 6 months now


we've never met eachother but we've been talking on the phone for about 2 months now. i love her with all my heart, and i admit - there were times where i questioned myself to be with her. but now, i've realized i really did fall in love with her. because now every girl i see, reminds me of her. she affects me a lot and i really care about her. it's just now we've reached to that point in a relationship where we face problems we've never faced before cause this is our first real relationship with anyone.


i know you might take some importance off for us never meeting but we plan on meeting eachother soon. we've been through a lot actually. trust and such. but now we trust eachother and we're overcoming a lot of problems and always talking them out. it's just the last couple of days i've been wondering if the hope i have for this relationship is strong enough to bring us together for the rest of our lives. this is our last year of high school and it's amazing to me how this far into the relationship - we still love eachother and yet we've never even touched eachother.


through out the last couple of weeks, i've been delving into her character and mind and finding out things about her you never notice about someone until you're in a relationship with them. i'm kinda confused now too because the last few days we've been having shitty days. today, she just told me that she just doesn't like it at all how one day we're okay and the next we're in a shitty mood. she said sometimes she's worried if things are going down to hell.


i'm completely optimistic in this relationship. and she is too. except this whole situation we have to face is so hard for us sometimes. the little things tear us apart that normally wouldn't if we were together.


all i'm asking is just insight and some advice on this relationship to kinda clear my mind. i've been confused and so thoughtful about this relationship because we both never experienced this. i HATE to think that we might not work out, i want us to be together. i have so much hope for this relationship. and even if we don't work out - i just want us to be together before or if we grow apart which i REALLY don't want to happen. she and the relationship has changed me so much mentally and really made me think different about so many things


all i'm asking again, is just some advice and insight on some people who've been here. i'm completely serious about everything and i just need to know someone who's feeling what i'm feeling right now. and how to make the best out of the situation me and her are facing.


thank you so very much.

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i can identify with you because i am in the same situation, same time frame. maybe better, maybe worse. cos you are already planning to meet


as you have spent more time with each other, it's like a real relationship but not completely so. so now your inconsiderate acts are really perceived as such, and not brushed away in the early days of courtship.


during friendship, a lot more is tolerated, since there is no 'loss' of the giving away of a heart. but when it turns to love, then every hurt and rejection and recrimination is a stab into the other party's heart.


this will go on after you meet too. meeting is a new milestone, yes, cos you have more situations to handle now. instead of just voice and text. you have your full 5 senses to love and hurt with.


i guess some might say it's easier to love without sight first. cos it's love of a person's personality. assuming you are not deceiving each other about your personal character. if you put on an internet mask, then when you meet, the deception will come off very quickly, or else you have to continue with your deception until such time as when you are found out or you give up cos it's just not yourself. or maybe you will change to become that 'better' person (very small chance of this!)


all those *beeps* happen in relationships that are made directly too, so it's inevitable between 2 individuals. but you should not accept it as something that will go away with time. it will only go away with time if you understand why it happens and what both of you can do to make it go away.


so you talk it through in truth and with sensitivity. sometimes, it's not really deliberate hurt, but crosstalk/misunderstanding. you may think you are helpless, if she is hurt when you have not intended to her hurt. or vice versa. but if you can both cool down, don't say hurtful things, but ask what is the real root issue, see it from each others' point of view, and be prepared to change on both sides to accommodate each other, then you will build a lasting relationship.

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