HELP!! I am trying to figure out if she likes me or not?

[lrw301jl]

Hello eveyone,

 

I am new to the forum and I am very thankful for stumble upon this great site. I have really big dilemma on my hands. There is a girl that I really like and that we work together on the weekends at my second job. She is really great girl. Well, she just broke up with her boyfriend that she had for three years. She couldn't stand him anymore because he gets too jealous. In the recent months, she realize that she is not happy being with him. She feels bad about this and breaking up with him. Well, they broke up about three and half weeks ago. She says that she feels bad in doing it and that she told him that she needed time away from him. She told him that she is just not happy anymore and that she shouldn't stay in relationship that she is not happy in. Well, we have gone to be close with one another after she broke up with him. I wasn't trying to break them and that I think the break up eventually was going to happen. Maybe I have some affect on it. All I said to her is that do whatever makes you happy. Maybe, I made mistake, but I told her that I like her. I don't know if that would back fired on me or not. She told me that she was really glad that I told her how I felt. She told me that she doesn't know and that she is not saying no or yes yet. She think is just too soon. I told her that I just really want to be given an chance for her to get to know because I think I am really great catch for a girl although some of you might think that can come be too cocky. I am nice guy, but I am guy that is has confidence about himself. I realize that all my happiness does not rest on if she becomes interested in me and becomes my girlfriend. To tell you the truth, it would really awesome if that would happen. For the last two weeks, we have call each other more and more. However, at times it seems like that her interests would go up and down. But however, within the last week, we went out to dinner and just two of us. It was really great and that she also invited to go out with her and her friends to the club on last Saturday night. We dance a little bit, it was cool. I telling myself to play it cool and that I just go with the flow. But however is really hard to contain my inner feelings. I just feel something for this and I don't know while. I had tough breakup about fourteen months ago and this is the first time that I really like a girl. I just really having difficult time reading whether she is interested and want to start something with me or just want to be my friend. I know people out there know how I feel when the person that you like tells you that they only think you as a friend. But I am just getting vibe, I don't know is good or bad. But she been the one that is been calling me for the last week and half. I did invite her to go do something tomorrow, if she is up for it. I told her to call me. I try to be funny and joke with her at times. She always tells me you so silly. I think I am making progress, just slowly I guess. She has tomorrow off from work and she only has class until noon tomorrow. But she has friend that just had birthday and they might go do something. When she says that she is going to call me, she pretty good about always bascially around the same time after she gets off work at night. Although we might just talk for about 20 to 30 minutes, we basically talk every night. She says that she will still call, if she is not going to do something with me.

 

Please help on all this, give me advice and tell me the truth on my scenario. I would love everyone's advice and comment. I want to thank everyone right for reading this and that I really appreciate from the bottom of my heart. I am very interested in what the female side says about this, although I look forward to everyone's advice.

 

THANK YOU ALL

Sincerely,

LRW301JL

[phil1981UK]

Hi buddy,

 

Well, i can sympathise with your situation as I am in the same position myself. I would say she is definitly interested but proberbly needs time to sort her head out after the breakup.

 

You havent really said how close you have got, if she hugs you and things like that then you then your doing well, if she dosent have any physical contact with you when your together then it could be just a friend thing to her.

 

All you can do is keep being there for her, dont change anything about your behaviour as whatever your doing seems to be working cos she is calling you all the time.

 

Just try and keep your head together (though this is difficult as I am finding out!) and make sure you dont over or under do things, a difficult balance to get and timing is everything, moving through the stages to a relationship requires good timing!

 

Just hang in there, if its gonna be, it'll be.

 

Good luck.

[badburnz]

You never know.I can sympathise.

When youre hung up on someone and theyre in a relationship you often wind up giving them signals without even knowing it.Paying them more attention than you would other people,flirting,being friendly.Truth is she probably knew you liked her before she even broke up with her boy.

This is where the problem lies.

After a break up,everyone is a little vulnerable.You kind of get used to the whole relationship thang you know,having a confidant,someone special to be with,someone to make you feel good about yourself.It gets to be a comfortable place to be,and as soon as its gone you dont quite know what to do with yourself.So you look around to find a substitute for the good things you just dipped out on,even if you dipped out on them because all the other things about the relationship were crap.

She likes you.No doubt.But does she like you for you,or is she playing with the idea that you can make her feel as good as she felt with her boyfriend?

The most horrible position to find yourself in is that of the rebound boy.

Dont go too quickly with this one mate,because shes probably feeling all messed up right now,and you dont want to go exposing yourself to someone who just wants a pacifier to calm her down in a bad moment.

Best thing I can think of is to just be a friend to her.Take the time to get to know her better.Talk to her about her break up even.Become her friend before you think about anything else.

Most of all,look out for your own best interests,because in her state she could well unwittingly (completely unaware like,no fault of her own)wind up playing with your head in a way that neither of you are going to feel good about in the end.

Nonetheless,best of luck to you.I hope it works out.

[russia]

personally, being a rebound guy is great. but you have to move out of rebound, or else she will thank you and move on.

 

as the rebound guy, you know all her frustrations. so check them off against yourself and make sure you do something about them. it's so much easier than having to find out your faults a few months/years later. you can make yourself look so much better in her eyes, and you have a head start on most men on loving their mates

 

examine if you really love her. if you do, don't be afraid to lose your heart.