He said we'd get back together...but now he is with her

[X ShadowDreamz X]

My ex and I were flirting a lot about 2 weeks ago, and I asked him if we would ever get back together. He said "yeah" and it wasn't like a "let me just say this to make her happy" kind of answer. Then about 3 days after that, my EX best friend starts to like him and they hook up. I was crushed by this. She tells him stuff about me that isn't true and makes him think I am nasty. Now him and I are just friends. I want to really get back with him. My ex best friend told me that she doesn't even like him that much and that she is just using him to have fun. She said that since everybody likes him so much, she wants to have her turn with him. But when him and I were together we had a serious relationship. She told me not to tell him what she said, and I haven't but I am thinking about it. But the thing is that I don't want him to think I am lying. I am going to be totally honest, my ex isn't the smartest person in the world. How the heck do I tell him that she is just using him?

[Prince]

Okay. First of all. That friend of yours isn't much of a friend. You must do something to get her away from him. Secondly, you must not tell him he's being used straight out. Becuse He will assume you are just jealous of him and her and will not look further. I suggest you concentrate on the idea of you and him getting together again. If you attack your friend, than it will come off worse for you. Approach him, and tell him this. tHan, maybe, if you have gained is trust, explain to him what your friend is doing to him.

[SunnyScott]

Girls often say that "oh I just wanna go out with him to have fun", yadda yadda yadda, but guess what, they end up falling in love with that guy for whatever reason.

 

I read John Grey's book, and he says that women are like ovens, and men are like blowtorches.

 

Just you wait and see, she'll get her heart broken by him, and once he realizes that she loves him, he'll get the steppin, call you back, and then find some other new chic.

 

Not to sound pessimistic, but that's what usually happens. So don't stress out about it. If he's not all that smart, then why do you want him anyway right?

[meanlady1]

Gee,

I really can not undersatnd why you wanna wait for this man or waste your energy, it is not worthy at all ! From what you said, your ex seems a very shallow perosn ( forgive my language) Is he still under 18 years old? or probalbe he is not smart enough lilk you said to understand love Are you sure he is the one for you? ( If he can chage his mind that quick to go with other girl?) Think about it.

 

Have some dignity of yourself and self-esteem.

 

Love

 

Very Meanlady

[PhoenixInATL]

I had a situation like that once. I had been living with my b/f and my best friend was moving back to the area and needed somewhere to go for two weeks. I asked my b/f if she could stay with us and he said okay. Two weeks turned into months. In the meantime, he and I broke up but I had nowhere to go, so I moved into another room. A few weeks later, she admitted to me that she slept with him, but wasn't really interested. She was just using him. Now that the cat was out of the bag, I guess they saw no reason to hide it anymore and started sleeping in the same bed, acting like a couple, all while I was living there. She and I also worked together so I couldn't get away from the situation.

 

After a near physical confrontation, I decided I'd be better off living in my car (Massachusetts in January), but luckily school let me move into the dorm early over winter break. Little by little, he and I started becoming friends again. Over time, her true colors started to show. He also saw she was sifting through my stuff I had stored at his place and was taking the things I had that she liked, even though she had a lot more money than I did.

 

Six months later he and I were closer than ever (friends). He showed me where she hid my stuff (clothes between their mattress, CD's under the socks in her drawer, etc.). We packed her stuff in boxes while she was away for the weekend and left it on the couch. When she came back on Sunday, she didn't know I was in the apartment (I was going through some stuff in the other room). They had blowout and she talked crap about me and tried to play the sympathy card, saying how mean I was to her at work, etc. (not true...didn't even talk to her). That's when I made my entrance, and her jaw about hit the floor. A few weeks later, he and I ended up back together.

 

Sometimes it does come around all by itself. She's not a friend of yours, and eventually she'll hang herself when her true colors start to show. He'll believe that far more than hearing it from you, because I tried to tell my ex early on while I was still living there, and it didn't make a difference.