Why she asking my friends to hang out?

[iamconfused5302]

Hello All,

 

I have been in no contact with my ex for a couple of weeks. Dang, I feel much better. Sure, I miss her and still like her but anything I do will not make things better. I decided to do NC, thanks to SD. Anyways, my ex asked my friends to hang out this friday. I think some of the girls are going to but my guy friends are not. She originally met them through me. Why the heck is she doing this? LOL,

[panchala23]

does she have other friends?

[Dako]

If you feel territorial, it won't change the past. I'd assume she wants company, and it's her choice.

Don't expect your friends to take sides.

[l9grl]

were you together for a long time? did your friends become her friends as well?

[iamconfused5302]

We only been going out for 3 months. Regardless, she is good with people. I dont expect my friends to take sides at all. I just dont understand why she is doing that.

[Jess...]

Hello All,

 

I have been in no contact with my ex for a couple of weeks. Dang, I feel much better. Sure, I miss her and still like her but anything I do will not make things better. I decided to do NC, thanks to SD. Anyways, my ex asked my friends to hang out this friday. I think some of the girls are going to but my guy friends are not. She originally met them through me. Why the heck is she doing this? LOL,

 

I can't answer that question for you, but I know exactly what you're going through. My ex did the same thing when he dumped me. He started talking to (text messaging, ringing up on the phone, etc) and then hanging out with MY friends, and has since sort of replaced me in my own group of friends. Which I think really stinks. It has shown me who my real friends are (and I've only ended up with one or two) and I don't know why he had to take my friends when he had plenty of his own. Unless he has to be around them to remind him of me, because he can't have me coz he dumped me. Haha jk. I wish haha.

 

But seriously, it is confusing, and doesn't make much sense, I know. Why hang out with your friends, when she only knew them through you...my ex only knew my friends through me too. Which makes me kinda regret introducing him to everyone, because if I hadn't, I wouldn't have to hear about him all the time, NC would be easier, and I would be able to go places with my friends. Without him there! But I can't, so I guess I just have to deal with it. It makes me so mad though. I never once tried to get in on his friends, and have no intention of doing so. It's just really frustrating that he's all "buddy-buddy" with my friends now, and he's known them for less than a year. I've been friends with them since primary school days, and he walks right in and replaces me. I suppose it could be the fact that he's a guy, and most of my friends are girls, but I don't know. Grr!! lol.

 

Maybe you could talk to your friends, ask them not to tell you anything about your ex, or what she's been up to, if they are going to be hanging out with her. You're in NC, and probly don't want to hear about what she's doing anyway. (Although you're probably wondering lol). Let them know that while it may be ok to hang out with her, you don't want to talk about how it went, etc. Unless of course you're ok with it, and it won't set you back any.

 

Good luck with things, and if anything gets too weird, or awkward, or just plain hard, I guess you could aways get new friends... It's not just that easy I know, I've been looking for new friends since jan this year lol. But it's a thought to consider. I was forced to consider it when I realised more and more of my friends had been talking to/hanging out with my ex. I know we shouldn't expect them to take sides, but if she only knew them through you....(and in my case, he only knew them through me...) then yeah...its a bit complicated lol. I expected my friends to at least have a bit of sympathy or whatever, and respect me asking them not to talk to him until things blew over, but no, they went completely the opposite way.

 

Thanks for making this topic. Allowed me to have a vent. One that I haven't had for a while lol