Is "Friends" the Way to Go?

[Burb]

Just got back from lunch with the ex (here's my thread that explains the situation). For the most part, it went well.

 

I told her that I thought that we should take some time off, then try to build a new relationship. She said she doesn't know what she wants, because she doesn't know where we'll be in a few months, so why commit to a new relationship?

 

While this was not the answer I was hoping for, I was ok with it. I realized today that I changed a ton in the two years I was with her, and am more happy right now than I have ever been.

 

She wants to be friends, and almost started crying when I told her I didn't know if that would be a good idea. (I didn't give her a firm answer either way.) She is also rebound dating...when she told me she was going on dates, I said I was a little surprised at how soon she was, and she said "It helps."

 

I know she is not over me. I, however, know that I will be fine without her. I would just rather be with her. I don't feel any different now, after our lunch, than before. While I would rather she not be seeing other people, it doesn't bother me too terribly much.

 

So, I want to hang out with her, every once in awhile, because I want her to see what she is missing. I am working out, have a good attitude, and am, overall, happy.

 

Any advice?

[in_love]

If you can cope with her dating and feel fine then YES friends is the WAY to go.

 

Look mate, dont fall into the "girlfriend" category. Be there for her, support her, be manly, strong and independent. Communicate with her and LISTEN reflectively to her. Be warm caring, strong and very very independent and possibly go on dates too... if she has feelings for you the more you are in her life and the more you show her you are there for her without expecting anything in return the the more you will gain in terms of friendship and a relationship (not necessarily romantic) with her.

 

A true friendship is priceless and maybe one day - unless you find someone new - she will realise just how great a person you are for her to have in her life in a romantic way.

 

Goodluck!

 

Friendship, Respect and Passion follows!

[Jeffrey2095]

If you can cope with her dating and feel fine then YES friends is the WAY to go.

 

Look mate, dont fall into the "girlfriend" category. Be there for her, support her, be manly, strong and independent. Communicate with her and LISTEN reflectively to her. Be warm caring, strong and very very independent and possibly go on dates too... if she has feelings for you the more you are in her life and the more you show her you are there for her without expecting anything in return the the more you will gain in terms of friendship and a relationship (not necessarily romantic) with her.

 

A true friendship is priceless and maybe one day - unless you find someone new - she will realise just how great a person you are for her to have in her life in a romantic way.

 

Goodluck!

 

Friendship, Respect and Passion follows!

 

I agree.

 

If you guys don't find it uncomfortable, and you can be friends instead of exes per se...

 

It could be great.

 

Jeffr